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Ball: Exeter

Date: 24th April 2010
Theme: Egyptian
Price: £55
Verdict: Although I’m not sure I like the idea of being “lured to the dancefloor by a snake charmer”, this ball looks like it will be a truly exotic occasion, boasting a bazaar, shisha den, Bucking Camel, mountains of food, and even a coconut shy, all for a very reasonable ticket price. In terms of music, Oxford University Big Band

, Out of the Blue and a silent disco will do the job very nicely. You’ll find me in one of the Bedouin tents.

Ball: Hertford
Date: 24th April 2010
Theme: Gala of the Gods
Price: £55
Verdict:For one night only, you will be transported to Ancient Greece. Well, you probably won’t, but there will be waiters dressed in togas and long false beards to make you believe you have. Hertford’s ball will be held in the Union Gardens, and will feature standard ball fare: a photo booth, Grecian feast, silent disco, and cocktails from “the legendary Hertford Bar”.

Ball: Corpus Christi 
Date: 30th April 2010
Theme: Medieval Ball
Price: £50
Verdict: I am slightly relieved that the Corpus Ball is in fact a black-tie event and does not demand medieval dress, yet it still looks set to provide entertainment in such diverse forms as a ‘Medieval Battle’ and ‘Inflatable Jousting’. For those of you who don’t wish to pose for photos in the stocks, there will be dancing accompanied by period instruments, unlimited medieval-themed cocktails, and a hog-roast to indulge in (although the “vegetarian patties” sound a little less appetising). Most excitingly, sweet treats will be provided by the glorious Patisserie Valerie. Sounds like a good and relatively inexpensive way to spend May Day if you can cope with the naff theme.

Ball: LMH
Date:30th April 2010
Theme: Arcadia
Price: £130 (dining) £90 (non-dining)
Verdict: Once you’ve battled through the website for this ball, you’ll find the challenge was worth it – LMH promises a “pastoral utopia”, which will somehow incorporate a Ferris Wheel and some of the UK’s top DJ talent. A three-course meal will be provided for those with a dining ticket, but food ranging from a Hog Roast to oysters will be available for those coming later. Champagne and G&Ts will be the drinks of the evening, followed by hot spiced cider to warm up early-morning revellers.

Ball: St Hilda’s
Date:1st May 2010
Theme: Made in Manhattan
Price: £55 (dining)
Verdict: With the ever-present risk of their ball descending into an overpriced excuse for a jazz evening, Hilda’s will have to be ambitious in order to truly pull of a Manhattan feel. While their website is full of the poetry and cliché about the ‘city that never sleeps’ it will be interesting to see how they recreate the New York ambience come May. If they can pull it off then it will be a classy event but there’s a thin line between glamour and tawdry. However, at £55 including dinner, it may be worth the gamble.

Ball: Teddy Hall
Date:1st May 2010
Theme: The Eastern Promise
Price: £85
Verdict:The Teddy Hall ball hopes to immerse you with an Eastern haze of shisha with all sorts of entertainment on offer, ranging from novelty acts like snake charmers and belly dancers to the headline DJ set by Pendulum. It should be a luxurious evening with Persian rugs to lie upon while either drinking a variety of cocktails or oriental teas in what their website describes as a ‘verdant desert oasis’. Lush.

Ball: Balliol – CANCELLED
Date: 8th May 2010
Theme: Speakeasy
Price: £70
Verdict: One wonders quite how, after last year’s disastrous attempt, Balliol could quite have the stomach to put on yet another ball. Going for a theme nearly identical to Queen’s is a bit of a mistake, but they have managed to bag DJ Yoda. Maybe it is unfair to judge a ball by its predecessor, but given that last year the alcohol ran out at midnight, maybe the prohibition era theme is appropriate. Fingers crossed Balliol can show, this time around, the quirky spirit for which they are famous.

Ball: Keble
Date: 8th May 2010
Theme: The Alchemist’s Ball
Price: £70
Verdict: Gold and eternal youth are the buzz-words of this original theme. Intriguingly titled highlights include a pampering ‘Purification Room’ and a ‘Gold Room’ casino. Check out their seriously impressive website. Live music and comedy are promised, as is a silent disco. Will Keble have the Midas touch? Let’s hope so.

Ball: Lincoln
Date:8th May 2010
Theme: Carnevale di Venezia
Price: £75(non-dining) £110 (dining)
Verdict: Lincoln’s masked ball looks to be a classy occasion. The carnival atmosphere is captured by jugglers, fortune tellers and magicians. Dinner includes a three-course meal in Lincoln’s Hall. Showcasing the best of Italy and served by masked waiters, a pizza, ‘caffe’, and scoopfuls of G and D’s ‘gelato’ complete the night. The ball is also notable for its links with the Venice in Peril Fund, which aims to preserve the magical but environentally unsound city. Money raised from the ball will help them with their vital work.

Ball: Somerville-Jesus
Date: 8th May 2010
Theme: The Paparazzi Ball (holding out for Lady Gaga, are they?)
Price: £95
Verdict: Hoping to live up the success of 2007 when it topped a Cherwell/OxStu Poll, the Somerville-Jesus Ball is allegedly going to be an ultra-glamorous affair, though their website has a little bit too much neon and Vegas imagery for me to believe this. VIP guests remain top secret. Celebrity themed, complete with red carpet, casino and 3D disco, the triennial ball wants to make the A-List of summer balls, but must work hard to avoid being more Now than Tatler.

Ball: St. Hugh’s
Date: 8th May 2010
Theme: The Secret Garden
Price: £85
Verdict: Cleverly using their greatest asset (the enormous gardens) as the ball’s theme, Hugh’s has a lot of room to being doing some fantastic stuff. Billing itself as “a commemoration ball without the price tag” they are planning on going all out with Victorian decadence. So far the website tells of a steam train, a massage parlour and morning tea on the patio, and rumours about alumni Hot Chip playing suggest that this ball could be well worth the visit to North Oxford. Hugh’s also claims to be hosting the first environmentally-conscious ball, which ties in with the garden theme, though the steam train perhaps doesn’t.

Ball: The Queen’s College 
Date: 25th June 2010
Theme: ‘Tender is the Night’ – Prohibiton Era
Price: £100
Verdict: As it is, the website is not giving much away, apart from a rather pretentious quote from Keats – a connection to the theme which only English scholars might deduce. However, at the higher end of the price range one should hope for great things. The fact that their 2004 ball was notable for the presence of Chesney Hawkes, however, doesn’t fill us with confidence.

Ball: Wadham Quadricentenary
Date:26th June 2010
Theme: –
Price: £120 Non-dining
Verdict: Unsurprisingly the theme is quadricentenary so there will be plenty of references to Wadham’s history and tradition. Eager to not put on a tacky or faux-posh event, Wadham have gone for a more alternative ball with two stages of live music which will feature DJs, bands and acoustic sets. They will also be embracing the best of traditional British cuisine with pies and bangers and mash both featuring. It looks as though Wadham will be doing everything possible to ensure that this is a successful commemoration, while maintaining a classicly Wadhamite “alternative” twist.

Ball: New College Commemoration Ball
Date: 26th June 2010
Theme: The Cave of the Golden Calf
Price: £195 Dining
Verdict: This is the big one. Unlike Magdalen, who held the Commemoration Ball last year, New have decided to go with a theme. The name is not picked out of the Indiana Jones reject pile, but a reference to an upper class London nightclub of the early twentieth century, suggesting an attempt at Wilde-esque bohemian decadence. Although little to no information has been given out as of yet, and even our spies in New are keep tight-lipped, I think it is fair to say beg, borrow or steal a ticket; it’s going to be huge.

Ball: Green Templeton College
Date: 19th June (Sat of 8th week)
Theme: Diamonds are Forever
Price: £150 (“VIP”) £75 (regular)
Verdict: Bond? A bit of an obvious theme and one that’s resulted in a gun and bullets providing the backgroud to their website (actally quite an informative one), but at least GTC are making a big effort. They’re going to have to work extremly hard to pull off their promise of recreating the romance of all the iconic 007 scenes, from an ice palace to the tropics, and a full casino. I only hope the “Octopussy” circus tent is better than the film. Their License to Kill zone offers laser shooting, racing and a sit-in helicopter simulator – sounds like fun if your attire is sufficiently… practical. I suppose the gorgeous Radcliffe Observatory is worthy of a film theme, and Saturday of 8th week is a good date to party.

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