I may as well come clean before we begin: I hate 3D. So when I read that Fitch Ratings had forecast 3D box office takings to fall in 2013, I was positively gleeful. Sure, I conceded, the decline would start off slowly. But soon enough 3D would be out of our lives, once more consigned to bad B-movies and novelty screenings at theme parks.
3D films are certainly not new – there’s been a fairly steady stream of them since the man-eating lions of Bwana Devil in 1952. From 2000 onwards, most 3D films being made were kids’ flicks, horrors and IMAX educational movies. But then came 2009, and the phenomenon that was Avatar. I tried to like Avatar,really I did. But warmongering, sentimentality and stilted acting aside, the 3D just got in the way for me. Audiences disagreed, and it became the first film to gross over two billion dollars.
The runaway success of Avatar prompted many production companies to retrofit their upcoming 2D films into 3D. In many cases, this resulted in the slapdash addition of a few ‘ooh’ moments which did little to justify the increased ticket price. But now, filmmakers are consciously choosing to make their movies in three dimensions. In recent years we’ve seen The Avengers, Life of Pi, Brave, The Hobbit and even Werner Herzog’s Cave of Forgotten Dreams through the little red and blue windows. Not forgetting, of course, the artistic triumph of Piranha 3 Double D, which as far as I could glean consisted of David Hasselhoff, CGI killer fish and a hefty dose of sexual objectification.
If anything, 3D makes films more one-dimensional. Our eyes are drawn to the object popping out of the screen instead of considering the depth and composition of the shot as a whole. Flying daggers, pointing fingers, trees which loom high above you – no more than flashy gimmicks with all the nuance and subtlety of Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus.Most cinemagoers are perfectly capable of enduring a two-hour feature without losing interest. If you feel it necessary to hurtle lethal objects towards the audience’s retinas every three minutes, it’s probably because your dialogue and plot are lacking. 3D is not a substitute for a quality script.
The shift towards 3D really got going when TV providers jumped on the bandwagon. Samsung, Panasonic, Toshiba and LG amongst others now sell 3D television sets, and Sky has its own dedicated 3D channel. 3D was being treated as more than just a fad: it was billed as the future of entertainment. The thought of every TV show being made in 3D filled me with dread. When I come home and kick back in front of the telly, the last thing I want to do is have to put those naff little plastic glasses over the top of the ones I already wear. The lurching shifts in perspective are so headache-inducing that I think I’d have to give up on watching things altogether.
But now, a glimmer of hope. Perhaps 3D is finally starting to die. The report by Fitch Ratings highlights that despite an overall rise, US box office takings for 3D films have not increased in the past two years. They suggest that this may be due to its higher ticket prices putting off consumers. Despite this news, the novelty has not yet worn off for directors, as a string of new high-profile releases will be shown in 3D this year. You can get your fix of action in the form of Star Trek: Into Darkness; frippery from The Great Gatsby;fun from Monsters University and god knows what from One Direction: This is Us.
It is reassuring to know that 3D isn’t invincible. As it stands, I don’t think its popularity is robust enough to warrant a full-scale conversion in every living room in the land. But I doubt it will disappear from the silver screen for a while yet. And why should it? If people enjoy the experience and are willing to pay the extra money for it, who am I to deny them? I only hope (naïvely) that we’ll see an end to films being made in 3D for the sake of commercial success alone. Litter your film with protruding space missiles if you so desire. But don’t neglect the understated beauty of two dimensions. There’s still plenty of people who prefer it.
