Booze cruise: Corpus Christi Beer Cellar

The Pelican and the Tortoise are iconic

Image: George Taylor

Located under the grounds of the prestigious college, down a gloomy staircase, is the humble Corpus Christi Beer Cellar. With its low ceilings, well-stocked bar and lively regulars, the space feels like it has ancestry in prohibition America. From its comfortable purple booths situated in spacious alcoves perfect for social drinking to its iconic IKEA red stools in the welcoming bar area to its copious shelving to place a pint on whilst you throw a dart or pocket a pool ball, there are many ways to enjoy a drink in this fabled establishment. So let’s talk about those drinks.

The Pelican! Named after our college mascot, the majestic fish-eating bird is concocted from a shot of vodka, another of Bacardi rum, half a Hooch, Blue Curacao and a dash of grenadine. Traditionally served in a plastic pint cup, this drink comes to you in a vibrant blue-red blend which quickly becomes a disturbingly grey haze. In fact, it tastes as grey as it becomes, a worryingly unnatural colour. At £5 it is perfectly serviceable for pres, potentially too sweet but does incredible work as a mid-bop pick me up. A huge shout-out goes to the Classics fellow at Corpus who invented it during his undergraduate years here.

The Tortoise is much the same, but green. Produced with a dash of lime, 2 shots of vodka, Midori melon liqueur, topped up with lemonade and a dash of Aftershock, the greenish colour reminds one of the urine of a man that hasn’t had water for a week. The avor would best be described as indistinct apple – it tastes like a slushy that’s been left out in the sun. It’s safe to say, neither of these drinks is winning any awards for avour but the high alcohol content and verve with which they’re served makes them well worth the money you pay for them.

This brings us on to the main event: Lance the barman. Lance hails all the way from South Africa and he comes with the same accent, charm and hospitality. He truly is the highlight of any evening spent in the Beer Cellar. With a decent sound system, the background noise of profanity as another pot is missed in pool can be drowned out by the indie tunes curated by local DJ talent, Tom Hopper. In conclusion, the cheapest pints available are £2.10 each: what more could you ask for?

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@caleblebster