Want to do it like they do on the Discovery Channel? Rebecca Fry on the surprising similarities between human and animal behaviour.
My very first lessons in love came courtesy of eighties rock star Pat Benatar. Educated at an all-girls school from the age of four, I grew up barely aware that there were two genders. Opportunities for experience-based learning were seriously limited. Still, listening to the car radio on my way home from school, one thing was clear: love is a battlefield.
Later on I became a teenager, met boys at Bacardi breezer infused house parties and probably even held their hands. Once or twice. I was growing up, trying new things, experimenting with my sexuality. Or was I? I began to realise that I was heavily influenced by my surroundings. Why was I so sure that sexual relationships involved the opposite sex? What was wrong with experimenting with other girls? Or even with myself? Our society teaches us that some sexual practices are natural, whilst others are considered perverse or even perverted. It was time to look to nature itself for some answers.
Brought up in relatively liberal, post-feminist Britain, which sees women succeeding in almost every walk of life, I still can’t even imagine making the first move. "Don’t act too interested, don’t text him until he texts you, and definitely don’t sleep with him on the first date," is typical of the relationship advice that most girls receive from male and female friends alike. Human dating etiquette dictates that female promiscuity is unnatural while men are genetically programmed to thrive on the so-called thrill of the chase.
In the animal world things are very different. Recent genetic research has revealed that females who mate with several different partners produce healthier offspring, giving them an evolutionary impetus to play the field. Female chimpanzees take this to the extreme, with some on record as having copulated with eight different partners in 15 minutes. Others have racked up an impressive total of 84 sexual assignations in just eight days. Lionesses are also voracious lovers, demanding sex at least once every half hour during their five-day heat. But the sauciest species has to be the female dunnock. These otherwise rather uninspiring birds are known to sneak away from their partners for a quickie in the undergrowth with different, genetically superior specimens. The minxes.
Yet in spite of widespread evidence of animal promiscuity, we humans still subscribe to the view that monogamy isn’t just natural, it’s everything we’ve always wanted. Right? Weaned on a diet of Disney classics, relationships always seemed simple to me. All you had to do was grow up, marry the local prince and live happily ever after. Wrong. With divorce rates at an all time high, forever seems to have become a relative concept. And it’s no different in Oxford. Though the majority of my close friends are in long-term relationships, I’d be hard pushed to name one that hasn’t "slipped up" one drunken night at the Bridge. But though fairy-tale romance eludes most of us, it hasn’t stopped me subscribing to the improbable idea that my soul mate is out there somewhere.
A quick glance around a card shop on Valentine’s Day might easily give the impression that it’s the same for animals. Cuddling bears and cooing love birds abound. But while the love bird itself really is monogamous, it’s one of the very few species that is. Genetic testing tells us that most birds live in pairs but are unfaithful to their partners, flying off to copulate with other birds at the earliest opportunity. Birds aren’t alone in this: studies show that less than 3% of mammals practice true monogamy, probably because it has very few evolutionary benefits.
Excluding black vultures, termites and prairie voles, it’s fair to say that most species sleep around. But it’s not just for fun. New research conducted by the University of British Columbia in Vancouver concludes that monogamy is in fact a risk factor for extinction. Apparently species that live in pairs or small harems are more likely to die out than those that live in large harems. In the Ghanaian nature reserves, studied colobus monkey species, which have few mates, died out an average of 18 years after the reserves were established. Green monkeys and baboons, which tend to live in large harems, are both thriving in the reserves. Similarly, monogamous duiker antelopes were eradicated after just 10 years in reserves where the more promiscuous buffalo continues to prosper. In the natural world, monogamy isn’t just difficult; it’s bad for your health.
While monogamy is rare, more contentious sexual practices such as homosexuality, masturbation, and even paedophilia are common to animal interactions. Once again, the animal world turns human stereotypes upside down. Though we’ve come a long, long way since Victorian times, the fact remains that most forms of sexual expression that don’t fit into the boy-meets-girl box are still regarded with some suspicion. In spite of the efforts of Oxford’s LGBT Soc, not one of my gay friends feels comfortable enough to kiss their partner in public. And though Friday night TV shows like Sex and the City may give the impression that we’re all happy to discuss vibrators, anal sex and X-rated fantasies over brunch, the reality is very different. Most of us tend to giggle and look the other way, retreating behind our menus before the discussion even gets off the ground. It’s a far cry from the criminal charges faced by practising homosexuals as recently as 1967, or the mandatory hospitalisation of those suffering from the "social plague" of masturbation in the 1700s. Still, with influential leaders like Archbishop of York John Sentamu supporting the 1998 Lambeth Resolution which rejects homosexuality as "incompatible with scripture", sexual freedom remains an aspiration rather than an actuality.
Animals seem much more comfortable with sexual experimentation. Dolphins in particular have discovered the secrets (and the pleasures) of free love. The mammals have been recorded trying to mate with seals, sharks, turtles, eels and even humans. They also engage in homosexual activity, rather amusingly involving blow hole penetration, and, if all else fails, will masturbate. Masturbation is in fact very common in the natural world. As Peter Boeckman of the Norwegian Natural History Museum points out, "masturbation is the simplest method of self pleasure. We have a Darwinist mentality that all animals only have sex to procreate. But masturbation has been observed among primates, deer, killer whales and penguins, and we’re talking about both males and females."
Homosexuality is also widespread. There are male ostriches that only court ostriches of the same gender, pairs of male flamingos that build nests, mate and even foster unwanted chicks, and same-sex chinstrap penguins who form long-term partnerships. Homosexual contact can also serve a bonding function. According to Mr Soeli, organiser of a recent exhibition on homosexuality in the animal kingdom at Oslo Natural History Museum, male big horn sheep will have sex with other males just to be accepted. The social relationships they form will later allow them closer access to the females of the flock. Closer to home, the bonobo ape, which shares 99% of our genetic makeup, will often choose same-sex action over offers from the opposite sex. Research suggests that 75% of bonobo sex is non-reproductive and that nearly all bonobos are bisexual. Devotees of sexual experimentation, these primates will use sex as way to relieve stress, regardless of prejudices or gender barriers. Perhaps slightly more worryingly, they will also attempt to mate with sexually immature apes, as will smaller seal bulls who have haven’t had much luck with the more well developed ladies.
Though the home truths brought out by scientific research into sexuality have provoked widespread controversy, they represent an important step towards the realisation that, in the animal kingdom at least, almost anything goes. The taboos that pervade human society just don’t seem to matter. Whether you’re male, female, gay, straight, faithful, promiscuous, it’s all good, and it’s certainly all natural. Perhaps my early learning with Pat Benatar was wrong after all. It’s society’s expectations and conceptions of sexuality that are the real battlefield. Love? Well, that’s another story.
