It should go without saying that nothing looks worse than effort, and that to appear scrupulously attired bespeaks an earnestness in preparation even more tiresome to behold than to deploy. Not only this, but the expectations thus created are needlessly high, waving the fastidious flag for all to see and inevitably despair. Already we are too tired to finish this paragraph without assistance, fittingly, from Oscar Wilde: ‘To have done it was nothing, but to make people think one had done it was a triumph.’
The truth in these observations is told by the great many who tack too far in the opposite direction, trying to remain calm but often failing even to remain casual, slipping instead into carelessness. At the extreme one finds the curious case of the intentionally careless, an utterly bemusing state, which makes no sense when written and even less when put into sartorial effect.
When in doubt, defer to someone with a keener eye than thee, who is signally concerned with the features of attractive male dress, having personal experience of both its features and its fit. To wit, the best shopping assistance comes from the gay male associate, and if this is not provided by the shop you should feel free to bring your own, a practice known in some parts as BYOG. A passable alternative is the attractive female associate, but help from any other quarter is easily more trouble than its worth.
When it comes time to compose an outfit from your closet – now appropriately curated – bear in mind that most sartorial offences come in threes: matching belt, shoes and bag; or shirt, tie, and pocket square. Try to think in terms of exceptions or surprises, such as, ‘Surprise! Pink and orange work better than you think’, while maintaining a sense of proportion by confining your exclamations to one part of your outfit, perhaps the furnishings for an otherwise simple suit. The main thing is not to banish all thought of coordination, but to treat this as an afterthought, leaving you that much closer to the sartorial vanguard, almost by accident.
