Preview: V-Card

In a term where weโ€™ve been starved of student drama, anything new is met with significant fanfare. While itโ€™s tempting to be cynical, this play lives up to its own hype. In V-Card, written by Alison Hall, Hazel is every inch the typical student โ€“ until her friends find out sheโ€™s never had sex. They set out to โ€˜helpโ€™ and chaos ensues.

Hallโ€™s writing is sharp and amusing, capturing everything from electric flirtation to cringy small talk to overenthusiastic but seemingly well-meaning housemates; the script is never afraid to get awkward or ridiculous. There is always a risk that student playwrights will slip into angst or slapstick, not doing justice to their subject matter. However, rather than catering to extremes, Hall instead cleverly and humorously addresses a variety of attitudes to virginity and sexuality. While this nuance is evident in V-Cardโ€™s writing, the show also serves as a fundraiser for GALOP, the UKโ€™s only specifically LGBTQ+ anti-sexual violence charity.

Ellie Fullwood is brilliantly expressionistic and believably innocent as Hazel while Lorcan Cudlip Cookโ€™s God โ€“ yes, God (Jesus also appears in the show) โ€“ is authoritative and ridiculous in equal measure. Glyn Owen, as Freddie, is perfectly boorish and surprisingly realistic, carrying off salmon-coloured trousers and a penchant for sadism. The cast all interact with assured ease, a difficult feat when working virtually.

The show was originally intended to be performed in a traditional format. However, the small matter of a pandemic quickly altered that. Hall told Cherwell that, while the news was initially โ€œquite disappointingโ€ฆultimately, making it into a radio play was a blessingโ€. With the other pre-lockdown option being socially distanced heavy petting, a radio play seems more authentic, particularly considering the productionโ€™s liberal attitude to sound effects; I, for one, am curious to hear Smurf Bukkakeโ€™s song โ€˜Iโ€™ll Think of England When We Fuckโ€™ and then to immediately repress all memories of it, unlike the play, which looks to be one to remember.

V-Card is piercingly shrewd, confidently witty and has adapted excellently to its current circumstances. Hazel may or may not lose her virginity, but youโ€™d better not lose your ticket.

Image credit: Phillip Olney.

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