Tuesday 10th June 2025
Blog Page 1167

OxStew: IS hails ISIS vote of confidence over magazine name

Alex Stronell
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OxStew: IS hails ISIS vote of confidence over magazine name

Middle Eastern terrorist group Islamic State has hailed the decision of student-run magazine ISIS not to change its name. Last term, Oxford magazine ISIS ruled out any suggestion that it would change its name in light of its unfortunate shared title.

Praising the magazine, established in 1892, a spokesperson for the Islamic State told Cherwell, “We thank the magazine for holding steadfast despite the unwarranted pressure to change its name. This decision will clearly do much to raise the profile of Islamic State. After all, ISIS represents the caliphate’s longest-running independent namesake.”

The Islamic State spokesperson, dubbed ‘Journo John’, thought to be acting as the group’s press officer and image consultant, continued, “This development firmly establishes the axis of IS influence – from Mosul, to Tripolitania, to Chibok and St Aldates.”

In the same statement, the Islamic State expressed its support and admiration for the reserve Oxford Blue boat Isis, which swept to victory against Cambridge in last month’s Boat Race, and also ruled out any suggestion of a name change last term.

Journo John continued, “The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant feels that it shares many values with Isis, not least perseverance, endurance, and a pervasive inferiority complex. With a look of exultation, he added, “Clearly sharing a name with a crew that many thousands of British students look up to as second-best will do much to further our campaign for radicalisation of the youth in Western Europe. Besides, I’ve always considered myself something of a Dark Blue.”

Meanwhile, Syrian President Assad has pledged a “merciless onslaught” against the magazine and rowing crew. In a statement released yesterday evening, the Syrian government denounced Oxonians for “furthering the cause of Islamic extremism through the flagrant inflexibility Syria has come to expect from Oxford societies”.

Kurdish forces fighting IS were more laid back in their approach despite the magazine’s decision. “Personally, I am a light blue,” General Barzani told Cherwell from the front line. He continued, “But I don’t hold it against the Isis crew. They won the race fair and square. The river did indeed flow Dark Blue.”

ISIS editorial staff and Oxford University Boat Club declined to comment on the issue. 

OxStew: Council buckles in lead up to election

E. Miliband
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OxStew: Council buckles in lead up to election

Oxford City Council is struggling to cope after a sudden influx of student registrations to vote, sources within the Voter Registration Department have confirmed.

Reports suggest that the council was suddenly inundated with thousands of new applications last week, as students came to the realisation that democracy might actually have an impact on their lives.

“The situation is dire,” Hugh Gradgrind of the council’s Voter Registration Department told Cherwell. He continued, “My office is literally buckling under the weight of these new applications. We received about 12,000 last week, the vast majority from Oxford colleges. Budget cuts have exacerbated the issue; we simply no longer have the man-power to process all these registrations.”

Staff at the Voter Registration Department have reportedly been working around the clock in an attempt to register the new voters in time for the election.

“Clearly this must mean that students have taken a sudden, giant leap away from apathy,” student commentator Joe Smiles remarked. “It’s good to see that students are awakening from their WKD-induced inertia, and starting to realise that voting is a civic duty”.

Another historian recounted their realisation that voting could make a difference. “I remember it vividly. It was 1am and I was on the Park End cheese floor, when suddenly it came to me, like an epiphany,” second year Pembroke student Jeremy Hacksworthy recounted.

He continued, “I don’t know if it was the Jägerbombs, or the S Club 7, or perhaps a mixture of both, but suddenly it hit me, in my bleary-eyed vodka-fuelled haze, like a divinely-inspired vision: if I vote, especially in a marginal seat like Oxford East, I might actually make a difference, I might actually change the course of the election.”

Senior sources within the Oxford Conservatives have expressed dismay at the news. Speaking on the condition of anonymity, a senior campaigner told Cherwell, “Our campaign strategy in Oxford revolved almost entirely around a goodly portion of students being deregistered. I remember chinking glasses when we heard OUSU despairing at low registration. Now all our efforts are in ruins.”

Academics have also reacted more negatively. “Typical Oxford students,” complained an Oriel lecturer. “Why is it that they must always leave submissions right up to the deadline?”

Punting to the Riviera

Summer Taylor
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Punting to the Riviera

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Concept and Styling: Rosie Gaunt and Summer Taylor

Model: Fay Kitiyakara

Photographer: Bethany Gaunt

Location: Salters Steamers, Oxford 

Why we should keep the Human Rights Act

Bella Sankey
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Why we should keep the Human Rights Act

This letter was sent in response to Jan Nedvídek’s article discussing the Human Rights Act.

Sir,

In his comment piece of 6 June 2015 (Strasbourg having a say on British civil liberties), Jan Nedvídek states that “any judicial decision made by the Supreme Court in London can be overturned by the Strasbourg court”. This is incorrect. The Strasbourg Court is not an appeal court and the Supreme Court is the final arbiter of UK law. The Human Rights Act is clear: British courts are not required to follow the judgments of the European Court of Human Rights blindly – they must only ‘take account’ of them. Domestic judges can, and often do, depart from Strasbourg case law to take account of the United Kingdom’s own laws and traditions. In a number of recent cases, including on whole life tariffs, the Strasbourg Court has revisited and refined its earlier judgments following detailed reasoning on an issue by the Supreme Court applying the HRA.

Repealing our HRA would only make matters worse – Strasbourg judges would be denied the chance to consider a British interpretation of European Convention rights. Before the HRA, British courts had no say in human rights decision-making, and British claimants had to take their cases to European Court instead. One of the main reasons for the HRA’s creation was to end the cost and delay of the long road to Strasbourg. Under the proposed “British Bill of Rights and Responsibilities”, if people’s rights cannot be enforced properly by UK courts, they will have to take claims to Strasbourg – taking us back to the bad old days of decade-long waits for justice and sky-high costs.

The common law has a proud history of protecting fundamental rights, but when Parliament legislates to override common law rights or oust judicial oversight, the common law provides no recourse. The nature of the cases taken to Strasbourg before the HRA came into force show the inadequacy of common law rights protection – from the criminalisation of homosexuality and the ban on gay people serving in the armed forces, to the lack of a legal framework governing the actions of the security services and corporal punishment against children. But far from being an alternative to it, the Convention gives hard-edged protection to many common law values.

There are also huge benefits to being part of a multilateral system that protects human rights – not least the wisdom that Strasbourg judges have brought to recent cases against the UK relating to indefinite retention of innocents’ DNA; discriminatory stop and search without suspicion; and the right of a British Airways employee to manifest her religion by wearing a small cross around her neck.

Mr Nedvídek also states that the Government’s policy “does not eradicate human rights”. This is true – but, according to former Justice Minister Chris Grayling’s October strategy paper, it will limit the use of human rights law to the “most serious cases”, with “trivial” cases struck out of court and re-draft the meaning of substantive rights – an unambiguous statement of the Government’s intent to end the universality of human rights and let partisan politicians decide which rights we deserve, and whose matter most.

The HRA was introduced with cross-party support in 1998. It enshrines into law the European Convention on Human Rights, Winston Churchill’s post-war legacy, drafted by some of our greatest legal minds. It is one of the few laws that requires the state to protect our safety and national security, and it has let countless ordinary people – soldiers, survivors of rape, domestic violence and slavery, bereaved families, journalists – hold the state to account.

Cherwell readers can learn more about those the HRA has helped, and why we are fighting to save it, at saveourhra.org.uk.

Yours faithfully,

Bella Sankey

Director of Policy, Liberty

Experimental Theatre Club

Mark Barclay
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Experimental Theatre Club

The experimental theatre club was once the stuff of legends. Rowan Atkinson, Richard Curtis, Michael Palin and Ken Loach to name but a few of its historic participants. It is therefore surprising that its resurrection has not received much buzz. Indeed at a recent workshop there were just eight people. It was great for us lucky eight, but it soon became apparent that it would be a real loss to Oxford drama if this fantastic group were not receive a greater place in the drama world. 

At this particular event ‘Words, Words, Words’, Katherine Bussert, co president of the society, led an interactive workshop in Shakesperean rehearsal technique. As we soon found out, not knowing your lines before rehearsal was a far more serious issue back then than it is now. Rather than receiving a complete script actors would receive only their lines along with the lines that immediately preceded their own. This was the only cue they had. If as was often the case, the actors did not know the full story, they would come on stage during rehearsals without really knowing what was going to happen.

This ‘method’, or probably just a practical reality in Shakespeare’s day, creates an extremely interesting rehearsal dynamic as we soon found out. After being separated into groups we were thrust on stage and made to perform a scene in which we each received only our lines. For one thing, it forces you to be much more aware of what you’re saying and how it relates to what everybody else is saying. You genuinely have to listen, not only to work out what’s going on but simply to know when you’re supposed to come in. Perhaps once actors become proficient in this type of method, they learn to be much more sensitive to their fellow actors. It is a method which indeed does not allow much scope for focusing only on your own performance.  Directors take note. 

Hopefully directors, producers and actors will indeed take note of these events in future, for having chatted to Bussert post workshop, it seems the ETC will have much to offer to future productions. She envisages the ETC as a resource people can tap into in order order to pick up new ideas, discuss and develop their projects or just even get a fresh pair of eyes on their work. In this regard, the production of Zennor at the Northwall Arts center was an encouraging showcase for what the ETC can do in collaboration.

The nice thing about ‘words, words, words’ however was that it wasn’t just for theatre pros. Its been a very long time since I had personally done any proper acting and yet in spite of my dire butchery of Polonius, I felt welcomed to mangle away my lines. This accessibility, in addition to the great potential it has to stimulate Oxford drama, is why the ETC deserves greater attention. I very much look forward to seeing what they come up with next. 

Preview: Twelfth Night

Mark Barclay
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Preview: Twelfth Night

Twelfth Night is one of the most difficult of Shakespere’s comedies to pull of. Firstly the story is just bloody convoluted. In fact both stories in the play are bloody convoluted. Secondly, it is bloody long. But on a good day, its one of the funniest things you can watch. From a preview its hard to know whether a production will border on the sublime or bore you of your seat. But the omens are looking very good indeed.

One of the really encouraging omens is the novel interpretation that director Chloe Cheung has brought to the table. A cursory glance at the theatrical skies (stalking their facebook page) will tell you that this production is set in the roaring twenties. Prolonged celestial divination will take you to their excellent trailer, filmed like an early black and white Hollywood film. Chatting to Chloe and the cast, you can see why this decision makes a lot of sense.

The twenties like the late Elizabethan era, were years on the cusp of modernity. For the Elizabethans this modernity was embodied in a burgeoning rationalization of the known world. For the roaring twenties however, this was a modernity defined by a fragmentation of the known world. Yet both periods represent fundamental shifts not only in the assumed epistemology of an epoch but also the assumed norms of social and sexual life.

This liminal status of thitherto un-breachable norms invites all manner of comedic potential. Most obviously this involves the possible jokes from confusions of gender, sexuality and class. Yet any confusion presupposes an established code the transgression of which gives these misunderstandings their subversive (and comedic) weight. The key difficulty therefore enlies in the fact that the presuppositions of the twenties are not the same presuppositions of the Elizabethan era. Put crudely, racy 1600s is probably tame 1920s. What will be fascinating therefore is how the fledgling transgressions of the Elizabethans square with the fledgling permissivity of the twenties. At worst the intermingling of contexts will appear out of place. But at best it might offer a cross cultural-historical dissection of the nature of transgression. In the redrawing of the boundaries the same in every era? Is the emancipation from gender and sexual norms connected to a parallel emancipation in class? Most tantalizingly what can this tell us about the new freedoms of our own postmodernity?

The further possible difficulty is that the nature of the two modernities are so different. Yes both periods elicited social change, but perhaps the two periods are simply too incommensurable with each other. For example the angular deconstruction of space in cubism versus the flowing baroque in the art of Rubens. This is not merely an aesthetic disjunction, but evidence of a fundamental break in the very conceptions of the world. With this in mind it begs the question of whether the common denominator of sexual and social progress is adequate grounds to group the two together.

How these issues will be treated and ultimately resolved I think is half the draw of the production. Such an audacious premise demands attention and on these grounds alone you can be sure that will be one to watch. The other half of the draw is the wonderful cast. Enthusiastic to the bone, their energy and buoyance could really be felt in the rehearsal room. Francesca Nicholls brings a breathy and exasperated aloofness to the role of Olivia. A characterization which works perfectly by allowing her to naturally switch from disdainful aristocrat to effortless flirt in seconds. Other highlights include Lucy Clarke as the rambunctious Belch. Her interaction with Maria played by Violet Adams is wonderfully entertaining. Their natural rapport bears witness to their previous dramatic collaboration. All in all this promises to be a fascinating addition to late Trinity Garden play fodder, but its potential pitfalls cannot be denied. But I very much look forward to finding out what the end result will be. 

Preview: Yesterday

Mark Barclay
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Preview: Yesterday

Yesterday is an innovative piece of new writing by Stephen Hyde and Katie Hale. As new writing goes this is a pretty bewildering case. Written as a musical, it is a story told by three female characters linked by their relationship to one man. It is a bewildering because the writers have taken a particularly different approach to telling the story. Not only is the telling of the narrative fragmented by the multiple narrators, but the chronology of the story they tell is itself fragmented. For what we hear are not simply three different but sequentially coherent voices, but three perspectives on the story telling different moments of the story.

It is a particularly intriguing form of storytelling, not least because it is set to music. Not content only to introduce variation in time and perspective, the writers have also segmented the story with differing musical styles. Each perspective on the story is characterized by its own musical style and motifs. In the scenes I saw the more conventional Sondheim esque musical form was well and present: soaring choruses , group harmonies and the like. But intriguingly there was also a big band style jazz piece, which made for a refreshing change.

From my preview it was not yet clear how this fragmentation of time, perspective and music was going to interconnect. If however on the night it does, then this could be a truly stupendous achievement. The intricacy both aesthetically and conceptually of such a piece would make it one of the most stunning bits of new writing this year. Nonetheless I’m still not sure whether the script has the potential to do this, let alone whether it actually will.

The overarching story the audience will have to piece together is told by the wife mother and mistress of a man we never see. The story concerns his life told through his interactions with these significant women in his life. I’m still not too clear what is special about this particular man or what it is abut his life that makes it dramatically interesting. But I’m sure on the night we will be rewarded if we stick with clues we are given. If these narrative clues coalesce in order for a conceptual and aesthetic coherence to emerge, then this ambitious fragmentation could indeed be the achievement that it elusively promises.

Interview: Brian Lara

Annabel Hazlitt
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Interview: Brian Lara

Brian Lara is a self-proclaimed superstar. Declaring so in the Union is a bold move, though, when you hold multiple cricket world records, and are the face of a PlayStation game, it is a title perhaps justified.  “The Prince” is best known for his ridiculously high cricket scores, and is an icon of the game, with a name that means something even to the generation who never saw him play.

I unashamedly began the interview with a cliché; which innings was your best? However, surprising me straight off the bat (no, I’m not sorry), Lara claims the best feat was not his individual innings, but the team performances. He cites the record for the highest chase in test cricket; 418 against Australia along side winning the ICC trophy in 2004,  “a couple of other wonderful test match victories that we’ve had”. However, I continue to press him on his own innings, basically playing a game of which world record is better. Lara claims that every record he had was “down to destiny”. The situation had to be perfect, it was because of this that he managed to score the big runs. He “never had any intention of scoring them… it was just destiny”.  

A Google search of Lara will not only bring up his incredible cricketing scores, but also his continued struggles with his country’s Cricket Board, a precursor to the problems of Dwayne Bravo, Chris Gayle, and the Englishmen, Kevin Pieterson. However, Lara is clearly proud of Caribbean cricket, especially its place in the islands’ independence movements. The West Indies is a unique test cricket team, in that they do not represent one single country, yet cricket has brought those represented islands together, ever since the team gained test status in 1928. For Lara, the “most significant period was around the 1950s, 1960s where the West Indies were becoming a force to be reckoned with within the cricketing world”. The appointment of the first black captain, Sir Frank Warren, in 1960, was hugely important as “you have to understand that the majority of the West Indies is of African descent and Indian descent and that to have someone representing the majority was very important at the time”. Lara was keen to stress the relationship between the people and cricket, and the role in which played in the independence movements, as it “spoke a different language, it spoke for the people”.

This link between the people and the game is one that Lara continued to focus on, as it is present in all aspects of cricket. When I pressed him, a clear icon, if cricket needs heroes, the answer was a resounding yes, partly for this reason. Lara argued that “in all teams there are going to be people that stand out” and “it is necessary that you have those guys who people pay money and go through the turnstiles to see. They don’t really want to see an entire team performance, there are going to be one or two individuals that are going to drag people out of their homes and into the stadiums”. Though cricket is a team sport, Lara seemed convinced of perhaps is own position as an individual player, and, indeed, “superstar”.

Since the glory days of West Indian cricket in the latter part of the 20th century, West Indian cricket has been on the decline, and commentators have pointed to the individualism so lauded by Lara as the root of this problem. When I put this point to him, however, it was met with emphatic disagreement, citing “a lot of other calamitous stuff happening in West Indies cricket” as the reasons for their poor current performances. Lara went on to emphasize that the problems facing the new coach Phil Simmons, came not from over individualistic players, but from the administration.

It is clear that Lara’s own disagreements and problems with the West Indies Cricket Board continue to affect him, and his view on the current struggles by players. Lara claims that “being a former player, I am very sympathetic to any player, be it Chris Gayle playing in Australia and the IPL or Dwayne Bravo who is doing the same. None of these guys grew up thinking about franchise cricket or playing cricket professionally abroad. They all wanted to represent the West Indies, and I know deep down inside they still want to. 

The struggles between administrations and players are not new, as is evident in Lara’s view of the West Indian Cricket Board, yet players such as Gayle or Bravo have an option that was not open to Lara; franchise cricket. Avid listeners of TMS and followers of cricket will be well aware of the fear that some feel over the future of test cricket, with the rise of T20, and this is a matter I put to Lara, himself one of the most iconic test batsmen in history. Lara was very firm that “test cricket definitely has a place.” However, Lara sees any potential threat to the game in its long form coming not from the upstart of the IPL, but from the fixed triangle between India, England and Australia simply playing each other. Although this can bring people to watch games and makes money for home boards, he believes the triangle to be “a little bit of a negative” as there are nations that “want to play test cricket and they’re confined to just playing against the minnows. Not being in the big league is an issue”. For Lara, this is the crucial problem that the ICC needs to address, as “it is very important for West Indies cricket, as our history really lies in test cricket”.

Having made it very clear that men do not grow up dreaming of playing franchise cricket, Lara adds that he believes the IPL to be a “wonderful addition to the game”. As many supporters of its introduction claim, he sees it as “necessary” as the “game slowed down and crowd participation was less”. He returns to the link between the people and cricket, and the best part of the IPL is that it has brought a “new spectator” into the world of cricket. T20 gives an opportunity for those who do not enjoy cricket in its longer form to appreciate the game, and, for that, Lara is “very much pro the IPL”.

Throughout the conversation, it was evident that Lara strongly believed in the power of the people in cricket, and felt in solidarity with players shunned by their boards, yet supported by the people. I therefore confronted the proverbial elephant in the room; the matter of KP. When I asked him about his views on the matter, Lara pointed to the recent appointment of Andrew Strauss, emphasizing that “it was so unfortunate that the man in the position now in terms of the career over Kevin Pieterson or any future player…. is someone who doesn’t have any pleasant things to say”.  Though he acknowledged that the recent victory over New Zealand in the first test was “pretty excellent”, the psychological effect on the team due to the “quagmire over KP” will be telling in the Ashes. Australia are coming to England this summer, aiming to win, and, in Lara’s words, “it will be tough to scrape even one”. 

Though cricket is a team game, Lara is clearly of the view that individuals should be celebrated, and I therefore asked whether, the composition of a team should be thought about, or you should simply put out your best XI to win a game. Lara retuned to his point that cricket is about and for the people, stating that “if you asked the man on the street, he’d want to see Kevin Pieterson in the team, as he is a part of the best team in England.” Lara falls directly in the Piers Morgan camp of “he should play”, as “all other trivial matters should be handled as big boys should handle it”. Having made this point, Lara goes on to emphasize that he himself had “tussles with the board” but they were not made public, and, at the end of the day, if the best team contains Kevin Pieterson, “so be it”. 

Lara clearly has strong views on cricket, and I asked him whether he would do an Andrew Strauss, and return in some official capacity to the game. However, it is clear that the wounds between himself and the West Indies Cricket Board have not healed, as it claims it is too tough for him to get involved if the “cricket administrators remain the same…with the same archaic thinking”. He sees his role as giving advice on an individual basis to young batsmen, but not in an official capacity with the West Indies team. Many have tried to shake up the system in the West Indies, and many have failed, due to the “close knit environment”, and Lara sees the future of West Indian cricket as “continuing to be sporadic”. The problems between administrations and players did not begin with Brian Lara, and they certainly did not end with him, yet he is a perfect example of a large personality, and wonderful cricketer, who has been forced to distance himself from the game. 

There are many issues facing cricket at the moment, exemplified by the situation of KP, yet Lara sees the game as being “pretty much healthy”. He claims the strength of of franchise cricket lies in the lack of cricketing boards, yet it is really up them how the game as a whole develops. The future lies not with the big traditional cricketing nations, but with the minnows, and growing the game worldwide. With constant innovations, such as the IPL, and expanding the game to more countries, Lara was confident that there would a long future for cricket, in whatever form.

 Lara claims to be the best in the world, and has the numbers to back it up. What I can’t help thinking is; its such a shame that he has been alienated by fat men in suits. Cricket needs heroes, and we shouldn’t drive away the ones we have.

“Sexually perverse” nuns unearthed

Alex Doody
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“Sexually perverse” nuns unearthed

Archaeologists have made an unusual discovery in the foundations of a hotel in Oxfordshire located next to the former Littlemore Priory. During the excavation by John Moore Heritage Services a total of 92 skeletons were discovered, 35 of which were female. Amongst the skeletons were thought to be some of the nuns at the Priory of Sandford, who were claimed to have died in disgrace following accusations made of their odd sexual behaviour.

One of the skeletons was the body of a woman buried face-down. The position she was found in traditionally signified penance, and implies that the woman was a sinful nun, who had been buried face-down in order to atone for the sins she had committed in life.

The fact she was buried outside the Priory also suggests a potentially sinful past – nuns were usually buried within the priory walls, hinting at her outcast status.

Paul Murray, the leader of the archaeological team, was quoted in an article on Ancient Origins entitled ‘Numerous skeletons of sexually perverse Nuns discovered in Oxford’ as saying, “Burials within the church are likely to represent wealthy or eminent individuals, nuns and prioresses.

“Those buried outside most likely represent the laity with a general desire to be buried as close to the religious heart of the church as possible.”

It is thought that the woman may have been one of the sinner nuns who inhabited the Priory in 1525 when Cardinal Wolsey dissolved the nunnery after accusing its inhabitants of immoral behaviour.

Originally founded in 1110 as a Benedictine house, the priory had found favour with Henry III. According to Ancient Origins, in 1517 an inspector by the name of Edmund Horde discovered that the Prioress had an illegitimate daughter, and had stolen many of the Abbey’s valuables in order to pawn them and raise money for a dowry.

She had forced many of her nuns to go without food or clothing. One of her nuns had also had an illegitimate child. The Prioress had attempted to cover up her behaviour, but other nuns exposed her, and the Priory was ultimately dissolved by Cardinal Wolsey.

Of the former Priory, only a small fraction remains – as a derelict pub. The skeletons have been taken away by researchers from the University of Reading for further analysis, after which they will be reburied on consecrated ground. The site of the burial ground will become part of a hotel development.

Singer fills blank space in Merton JCR

Ellen Milligan
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Singer fills blank space in Merton JCR

Merton JCR passed a motion on Sunday making Taylor Swift an honorary member of their common room. The motion, proposed by Taylor Swift enthusiast Rhys Clyne, passed unanimously with no opposition.

The motion stated, “In these dark times of constitutional confusion, the JCR could use a guiding light. To that end, Taylor Swift looks like our next mistake. After all, Taylor Swift can make the bad guys good for a weeeeeekend.”

The motion continued, “It’s gunna be forever, or it’s gunna go down in flames, or it may lapse in one year unless renewed.”

The JCR intend to “send Taylor Swift an open letter informing her of this great honour, and extend an invitation to visit Merton College at any time”, as well as mandating the Entz Reps to play a minimum of three songs by her at their next bop and to refer to the current Warden of the college, Sir Martin Taylor, as ‘Sir Martin Taylor Swift’.

When asked if he is hoping to have Taylor Swift visit Merton, Clyne commented, “She’s just a girl trying to find a place in this world, why not at Merton? We’re currently drafting a letter, and if she does come we’ll shake it off, of course.”

In the same open meeting, Merton JCR also passed a motion to make the bar manager, Dave Hedges, an honorary member.

Clyne commented, “Dave has worked at Merton for 28 years, and has been our beloved bar manager for 17 of them. He’s seen three different wardens, five different domestic bursars and thousands of students. He is an absolute legend and integral to college life. He’s been a spiritual member of the JCR for years, we just made it official.”

Merton JCR President, Daniel Schwennicke, commented, “Personally, I welcome the initiative to make more use of the possibility of electing Honorary Members, and I think Ms Swift is very deserving of this honour, mainly for the reasons so meticulously laid out in the motion.

“Our bar manager Dave has rendered a great service to the College and its students, and perhaps deserves the Honorary Membership on more tangible grounds. But I’m really quite pleased about both motions.”

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