Tuesday 21st October 2025
Blog Page 1777

Oxford student survives storm

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One Worcester student had a different kind of tree in their house this Christmas.

Eleanor Wilkinson, a third-year classicist, was awoken on the 13th December by a huge beech tree falling through the roof during a storm. She described a “deafening crash which shook the whole house.”

The tree fell into her parents’ bedroom, landing on the side of the bed where Wilkinson’s mother usually slept. She was away on the night but her father was taken to hospital, having suffered severe damage to his ear.

The family were moved out of their home while surveyors were stabilising it with scaffolding, though they eventually did return. Having found the house cramped and stressful, however, she decided to return to Oxford early.

Wilkinson told Cherwell that it had been “a terrifying experience.” She stated, “It was all fairly surreal and I felt quite shaken up for a week or so.” The incident has also affected her Oxford work, as the student has since been unable to access her books and has taken time out to help clean-up the house.

Despite the negatives, the Worcester student said that she was grateful that there were no more severe injuries, and that her mother was away in London, stating: “I hate to imagine how much worse it could have been had this not been the case”. She even found a positive from the incident and its subsequent reporting in The Sun, posting a link on Facebook remarking, “it isn’t everyday you pose for the Sun in your pyjamas.”

Mass resignation at St Hilda’s MCR

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The St Hilda’s College administration has been accused this week of causing much of the college’s MCR committee to resign, after various members left their positions prematurely at the end of last term.

MCR committee members at St Hilda’s are normally elected in Trinity term, and carry out their roles for a full year. However, seven members of the 2011-12 committee, including the President, Vice-President and Treasurer, announced their resignations in November, having served for just one term.

A member of the St Hilda’s MCR, speaking to Cherwell this week and claiming to be “familiar with the events that happened last term”, alleged that these resignations were the result of an ongoing conflict between the MCR and SCR.

The MCR member, who wished to remain anonymous, said that conflict arose after disagreement surrounding an MCR cocktails event, which had been scheduled to take place in St Hilda’s MCR on Guy Fawkes Night but was cancelled shortly beforehand.

The MCR member’s account of events suggested that college authorities stopped the cocktails from taking place, on the grounds that the MCR, as they saw it, had not followed correct procedure in arranging them.

The member claimed that “This event fuelled a state of confusion within the MCR, as the MCR was no longer sure of what the college rules were for running events”, and also criticised the college Dean, Dr Margaret Kean, claiming that when asked about the rules “she gave snippy remarks and avoided answering.”

The MCR member continued by alleging that meetings were held following the incident between MCR and SCR representatives, but that “no resolution was reached in the course of those meetings, as it seemed that the SCR was unwilling to hear the other side or make any concessions.”

The member gave an account of events leading up to the seven committee resignations, saying, “It was quite apparent that events had reached a stage in which the MCR Committee and the college administration were no longer able to work together.

“This breakdown exhibited itself as the administration’s breaking of agreed protocols, the administration’s unwillingness to communicate new rules to the committee, and the administration’s unwillingness to take steps to resolve the contention between the committee and its representatives.

“Given these circumstances, the MCR Committee felt that they were no longer able to work in an environment where what had been agreed upon was randomly changed, while the new rules were not being communicated.”

However, the source criticised the manner in which the resignations were handled, saying, “The resignations were poorly announced. The MCR body was not made aware of the underlying problem with College (only the committee knew what was going on). Likewise, the college was not officially informed of the reason why the MCR committee was resigning.”

The St Hilda’s JCR President, Sarah Finch, though not endorsing this version of events, seemed to accept the notion that some kind of conflict with the SCR was to blame for the multiple resignations, telling Cherwell, “I can’t really comment on the details of what happened, but I understand that it was a clash with college. It’s a shame that things went to such extremes, but a new committee has been elected now, so that is good news, as Hilda’s has a really strong graduate community.”

By contrast, those MCR committee members who resigned last term have offered alternative explanations. In a joint email, they told Cherwell that they left the committee “principally in relation to time commitments”, saying, “These were all roles that people had taken on in Trinity term last year, before knowing their schedules and commitments for 2011-12.”

They denied that the MCR cocktails were cancelled by the college against the MCR’s will, saying that the decision not to hold the drinks was due to the fact that they coincided with a memorial event for Chao Cao, an engineering fresher at St Hilda’s who died in tragic circumstances last term.

Outgoing committee members also refuted the claim that “the MCR Committee and the college administration were no longer able to work together”, claiming that they continued to organise “events planned both prior to and following the cocktail party, and which were, where relevant, agreed with College.”

One resigning member, speaking individually, added, “There were some misunderstandings and miscommunication between the MCR and college but certainly nothing sensational. As one of the members who chose to resign, I can assure you that my decision entirely based on
time constraints as I explained at the college and MCR committee at the time.”

Dr Georgina Paul, Tutor for Graduates at St Hilda’s, echoed the account of outgoing committee members, and suggested that relations between the MCR and SCR are now healthy, saying, “Communication channels between the MCR and the relevant College officers are functioning excellently as the incoming MCR President and her team set about organising a schedule of events for the forthcoming term.”

The Dean and the Tutor for Graduates issued a joint statement, saying, ‘The College is grateful for the hard work of the outgoing Committee members and is looking forward to working with the current MCR Committee this term.’

Councillor’s comments cause backclash from residents

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An Oxford councillor reviewing a bid for the construction of 26 student flats in East Oxford has labelled some complaints against the bid ‘frankly offensive.’ Tony Brett, a councillor for Carfax Ward and Chairman of its Planning Review Committee, said that the language used in emails to him sounded ‘horribly like the racism of the 60s, the homophobia of the 80s and the sexism of the 70s.’

He cited emails from residents claiming that students ‘are incapable of talking quietly or without using offensive language in every sentence […]along with continuously playing loud music.’ Another email from a resident said that the ‘community is being destroyed and controlled by the universities and their students.’

Mr Brett, an alumnus of Corpus Christi, said, ‘It is very dangerous to start making assumptions about people’s behaviour based on who they are rather than what they do. There has always been a bit of ‘town/gown’ tension in Oxford and I suspect there always will be.

‘It’s true to say that student numbers have increased quite significantly in the last five to ten years but I don’t believe that should be any reason for all people in Oxford not to be able to get on with each other and live in harmony. We hear about resident/student battles but my view is that students are also residents and as much a part of the community as everyone else.’

Ed Chipperfield, Chairman of the nearby James Street Residents’ Association, criticised Mr Brett’s choice of comparison. ‘Residents, including students, should feel free to raise objections to planning or voice criticism about how their environment is managed. Tony has carelessly abused the trust that people place in him as a councillor by ridiculing people’s honest opinions in a public arena.’

He pointed out some tensions in his area, saying, ‘There are a few issues that everyone agrees need tackling. We have a real problem with antisocial behaviour, particularly late at night and especially after Fuzzy Duck’s at the O2. I can’t speak for everyone in East Oxford, but I can let you know what I’ve seen in the last six months. People kicking walls over, knocking bins off their stands, climbing lampposts, urinating through people’s letterboxes, urinating through garden fences, falling over in front of moving traffic, two cases of ABH – there’s more, but this gives you a picture.

‘The real friction is just a simple fact of numbers: there’s an expanding amount of students in a very small area, making locals into a smaller proportion of total population than ever before. You can’t blame people for wanting to live here. If the proportion of students is allowed to rise without check, then we’ll see a lot more independent traders shutting down because they can’t sustain their businesses.

‘There is no divide between students and locals in East Oxford. Clean streets, safety at night, thriving local businesses, a good night’s sleep without disturbance – what’s good for locals is good for students, too.’

A spokesman for Oxford University said, ‘The University of Oxford is committed to playing a role in the local community and minimizing any disruption to Oxford residents. We are the city’s largest employer; our world-class museums and our various green spaces are free to enjoy; our medical research directly benefits local hospital patients; we work closely with local schools, including primary schools; and over 3,000 Oxford students are involved in volunteer work, many of them locally.’

The spokesman also said, ‘The University of Oxford provides extensive accommodation for its students: at least two and often three years of accommodation for undergraduates, in contrast to most universities, which provide one.

‘The University is committed to creating more student accommodation to further ease pressure on the local rental market. Student accommodation developments are undertaken not just for the benefit of students but to ease the pressure of a large student population on city residents by taking students out of the rental market.’

St John’s officially Fairtrade

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St. John’s announced this week that it has officially gained Fairtrade status, and become the eleventh college to join the Oxford Living Wage campaign.

Uchechukwu Ukachi, John’s JCR President, told Cherwell that the changes were achieved through the collaboration between the JCR, MCR and some members of the college staff.

He said the changes were “fantastic”, adding, “the JCR believes that this is just the beginning of our commitment to Fairtrade and living wage.”

Although Oxford Brookes became the world’s first university to attain Fairtrade status in October 2003, and Oxford itself has held Fairtrade City status for over five years, Oxford University has not yet become Fairtrade. The University would need over two thirds of colleges to conform to Fairtrade Foundation rules to qualify.

Philip Coales, JCR Vice President, said, “The Fairtrade certification is a strong move and we are also looking into sustainable fish sources. Soon the only cod served in college will be a healthy portion of Modern Warfare.” Edward Love, Environment and Ethics Officer, said it was “an absolute pleasure” to see the college officially become Fairtrade.

Following discussions which began last year, the college will also ensure that all scouts see their wages increased. Those with a GNVQ (General National Vocation Qualification) will be paid a Living Wage while staff without a GNVQ are encouraged to obtain this qualification for a further pay rise.

The Living Wage Campaign, which “calls for every worker in the country to earn enough to provide their family with the essentials of life”, sets the Living wage at £7.20 an hour, an increase of nearly 20% on the national minimum wage of £6.08.

The Chair of OUSU’s Oxford Living Wage Campaign, Carys Lawrie, called the changes “a great achievement”, adding “we are hoping this will lead to increased pressure on other colleges to follow suit.” Speaking on the campaign, she said “We aim to have everyone in the university understand why the Living Wage matters, and more specifically to work towards having a campaign in every college which does not already pay the Living Wage. We are also hoping to encourage those colleges who do pay a Living Wage to work towards accreditation as Living Wage Employers.”

Dan Stone, OUSU Charities and Community Vice President, commented, “This decision shows a commitment to ethical employment practices and the just treatment of workers across the globe. We welcome the decision and hope that other colleges will follow suit despite the tough economic times”.

Birmingham University Injunction

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Birmingham University has recently been granted an injunction that criminalises any occupation of university property for the next year.

The injunction follows a recent occupation of an abandoned campus building and other protests which have resulted in sanctions against students.

Tessa Gregory, a solicitor at Public Interest Lawyers who is acting on behalf of Birmingham students, described recent events as being ‘a shameful attempt by the university to prevent students from exercising their lawful right to protest.’ A Birmingham University spokesperson claimed that the injunction would have no effect of the right of student protest on campus; ‘it merely covers the unauthorised occupation of campus or buildings.’

Other universities have also resorted to legal action to end occupations. Sheffield University have recently withdrawn a similar injunction last week after successful negotiations between student occupiers and university authorities. Students at Royal Holloway were also threatened with a high court injunction, although the occupation ended before the university resorted to such action.

Asked to comment on the Birmingham injunction and Oxford’s response to a future occupation, an Oxford University spokesperson stated that the University ‘fully supports people’s right to protest, as long as it is within the law. We do not support occupying University buildings as a means of protest. Any response to a particular protest would depend on the circumstances.’
In November 2010 the Radcliffe Camera in Oxford was occupied by a group of students as part of a wider protest against public sector cuts. The protest ended after more than 24 hours when the police managed to break through a door.

The National Campaign Against Fees and Cuts has placed the blame on the increasing privatisation of higher education. They say that certain principles, such as freedom of expression and democracy on campus, are being lost, as ‘high paid university executives are cracking down on all forms of dissent on universities’ campuses.” They will ‘fight this draconian injunction in court’ as well as disregarding the injunction in practice by organising more protests at Birmingham University.

Blagging The News: Republican primaries

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Mr Jones: I must say, Romney’s narrow victory at the Iowa Caucus doesn’t surprise me. I’m just shocked at the speed with which Gingrich’s star waned and Santorum’s waxed!

Mrs Jones: I’m of the same mind, my dear. What with Romney taking first in New Hampshire, he’s a shoe-in for the nomination in Florida.

Are you perplexed by potical postulation? Desperate to keep up with the Joneses, but at a loss for what to say at the dinner table? Cherwell is here to help you perfect your chit-chat.

What:

Candidates compete against each other in each of the 50 states, to see who will eventually be nominated as the Republican candidate for the Presidential elections in 2012 at the Republican National Convention in Florida. The Iowa caucus, a series of meetings, which took place on January 3rd, is the first of these showdowns. Most of the rest of the contests, including New Hampshire which took place on Tuesday, are primary elections.

Who:

The front runner is Mitt Romney, who won both Iowa and New Hampshire. Apart from Jon Hunstman, whose campaign we suspect has peaked with a third place finish in New Hampshire, Romney is the only sane candidate. Others include Ron Paul, who is running to become President of a government that he vehemently opposes in principle; Newt Gingrich who, apart from having a ludicrous name, has managed to recover his campaign (ish) after being abandoned by his entire staff; Rick Santorum, who has taken a break from opposing all things gay, to almost win the Iowa caucus. Cripes. Oh, and Rick Perry who is batshit mental. Some consolation can be found in the news that Sarah Palin wannabe Michele Bachmann dropped out of the race after polling a dismal 5% in Iowa.

Soundbites to wow with:

‘It just goes to show how unrepresentative the Iowa straw poll is. Michele Bachmann has pulled out of the race, despite winning there.’

‘Although Republican candidates have to appeal to a significant core of conservatives and evangelicals, elections are always decided in the centre – Romney’s the only one who can challenge Obama.’

Don’t say:

‘Rick Perry’s social views really encapsulate the values of compassionate conservatism.’

‘Newt Gingrich is a family man.’

Corpus Christi cans OxStu

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Corpus Christi’s JCR has voted to suspend its subscription to the Oxford Student.

The decision comes after the student publication produced a series of articles concerning the “debauchery, anti-Semitism and nepotism” witnessed at the Oxford University Conservative Association (OUCA)’s recent events and gatherings. Certain members of Corpus’ JCR, who featured heavily in these articles, feel that the newspaper targeted them unfairly.

Corpus Christi’s JCR president, Kezia Lock, told Cherwell how the JCR’s decision to unsubscribe resulted from the direct and disruptive nature of the paper’s attack on certain JCR members. “These stories were not factually accurate. Some JCR members went in to counselling following the publication of the articles.”

Lock has branded the OxStu’s behaviour as “unfounded harassment” which could be avoided “if the OxStu abided by the Press Complaints Commission’s standards and ethics, which they say they do but clearly don’t.”

The Oxford Student has fought back in defence of their journalistic integrity. OxStu editors Nick Megaw and Laura Simmons told Cherwell that “none of our reporters deviated from the PCC code of conduct, and all stories printed in the paper were based on verifiable facts and checked by lawyers, and thus we consider any accusations of libel or harassment offensive and unfounded.”

The motion to unsubscribe from the newspaper passed with an overwhelming majority. Those proposing the motion declared that “The Oxford Student on a regular basis publishes potentially defamatory articles about our college and its members. It is comprised of student journalists desperately trying to make a name for themselves. It shows little journalistic rigour or integrity.” Felipe Monge Imedio, proposing the motion, stated that “it is morally wrong for us to finance attacks on our own college.”

A JCR member seemed to share Imedio’s sentiments, commenting, ‘Cherwell is to The Oxford Student what a crystal phial of aged Cognac is to a beaker of tepid cat urine. The former exudes elegance, and sparkles with effortless sophistication and tantalising finesse; the latter is rancid, unsubtle, and unappealing to all but the crudest of observers. Corpus, it follows, has shown a commitment to taste and quality, which other colleges would do well to imitate.’

Jim Everett, another Corpus JCR member, made a speech during the meeting in favour of terminating the JCR’s subscription, saying, “Corpus is a welcoming and close-knit college and we cannot accept unfounded personal harassment of our members.” Everett has claimed that other Corpuscules believe that other colleges should stand up against the bullying of individuals in the press. “Such harassment is not just levelled at Corpus members.”

The JCR President Kezia Lock has circulated a draft letter to be sent to the newspaper detailing their reasons for unsubscribing.

However, Lock’s letter remarked that the OxStu is not the sole target of the JCR’s criticism, and suggested improvements that the student press could make. “If you ensured your writers actually subscribed to the code of practices and conduct outlined by the Press Complaints Commission, rather than merely asserting that they do, other individuals will be protected from going through what some of our JCR members had to and such poor journalism will not be published in the future.”

Lock said that while the JCR is not under the illusion that its unsubscribing will “cripple the OxStu economically,” the money saved will go to the charity Reporters Without Borders.

5 Minute Tute: Nigel Farage

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1) What is Euroscepticism?

The word makes it sound like it’s people who are sceptical of this idea of a United Europe but who have yet to make up their minds, perhaps. That’s why the word ‘eurorealist’ is being used more and more by younger people.

But for the ease of understanding and perhaps to keep it easier for the media, it’s come to mean people who don’t trust the EU and want to change our relationship with it. Thus it doesn’t just include people who want to withdraw and replace our relationship with a free trade deal but people who perhaps think that we can remain inside and renegotiate treaties.

2) What do Eurosceptics think the UK’s relationship with the EU should be?

Well, once again that rather depends on the definition and the different clauses in that. I can only answer for me in that I want the UK to withdraw from the EU and replace the current situation with a free trade deal and friendly relations with our neighbours. Fundamentally, I do not want the UK to be a second class European country, I want her to be a first class global one and that can’t happen whilst we remain in the EU.

3)  Wouldn’t withdrawing from the EU damage the UK’s international standing?

Quite the reverse. Right now, we don’t even have a seat on the World Trade Organisation. How is that any good for our international standing? Of course there are other things which could help such as stopping pointless, costly wars which maim and kill our young men and women but we should be out there dealing with the world, not with a group of countries who are introspective and have a declining influence.

4) How much do you think Euroscepticism in the UK will be boosted by the current Eurozone crisis?

The figures already show a trend which was on the increase has just had a real boost. Before the EU was something that was ‘over there’ and it was all to easy to ignore the every day effects it has on our lives, particularly with a political class and media happy to perpetuate that. But now it’s all over the news, it’s costing us money and of course we’ve seen two democratically elected governments kicked out and replaced by ones which the EU considers to be suitable. Whatever you think of politicians like Berlusconi or, say, Gordon Brown when he was Prime Minister – and what a disaster that was – the people had the choice to kick them out through the ballot box. That’s what this country did. I’m sure if we were ever given the option on voting for the EU leaders they’d be surprised at the reaction from the people who they prefer to ignore.

5. Has David Cameron’s veto made a difference to UKIPs support and Britain’s long term future with the EU?

I was pleased with David Cameron’s insistence that there be no new Treaties which would not provide safeguards. However I do not think that any Treaty which grants more power to the EU is in the country’s interest nor do I give much value to ‘safeguards’ or ‘red lines’. The simple fact is that the EU wants to put a stop to these Anglo-Saxon ways of international finance as they are ‘not British’ and indeed the desire to control, regulate and fundamentally ban hedge funds was proposed in the European Parliament by a German MEP in 2006.

The generation gap

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Old and young have been pitted against one another, presumably since the first day a human being actually actually made it to retirement age. The young have always been sent to toil, fight and otherwise suffer to defend the elder generation, and a set of comforts that they too might enjoy one day. And now, as at every other time of strain, the young across the world have had to shoulder the bulk of the burden. In the UK the bill for higher education has been handed to students with barely a second thought, while any cuts to pensions must make it through lengthy negotiations. In France and Spain almost half of all twenty-somethings languish jobless, while their parents remain well-paid and unsackable.

The division is most extreme in America, where almost ever major issue is a clash between young and old. Obama’s attempt to extend health insurance to the young met with bitter opposition from well-off old people; the values of an older generation and the laxer morals of the young continue to provoke vicious clashes. Yet politicians tend to reach out to each group only through euphemism: conservatives lament the passing of time, while liberals prefer to talk of the future. The Tea Party and the Occupy movement are drawn almost exclusively from old and young respectively, and instead both implausibly claim to represent all ‘real’ Americans.

The question, then, is whether this long, sprawling economic crisis, by exacerbating the divisions between old and young, will lead politicians to break the taboo and actually talk about generational conflict. It seems unlikely, not least because nakedly pandering to a particular group of voters tends go down badly even with those voters themselves. Self-interest looks best when dressed up in a grand narrative, a tactic that has reached a zenith of absurdity on the America right, where any attempt to channel spending to under-50s amounts to a socialist conspiracy to end Western civilisation.

The patchwork of values that has for so long sustained indulgence of the old is wearing thin. The state today is expected to provide on the basis of need, not age. The mantra about having worked hard all one’s life rings hollow when that work was for private gain; though no politician would survive long calling for television and fuel subsidies to the elderly to be cut, they would hardly fare better calling on the young to be proud to serve their elders, an exhortation that would have seemed quite normal only a few decades ago.

Still, the young remain weak as a political group, not least because of our tendency not to bother voting. Whatever disadvantages we may suffer as a group are masked by the fact that our individual lives are, in general, constantly getting better, as we receive first paycheques and find first homes, but the latent tension remains. The odds of a youth political movement emerging to promote investment in education and reforms to pensions are therefore quite negligible, but a more honest discussion of the conflicts of interests between young and old may not be far off.

Start as You Mean to Go Wrong

1) Every year as January 1st rolls around, we all try to think of interesting yet achievable New Year’s resolutions to improve ourselves or broaden our horizons. Every year I fail to last more than a week.

Starting out with overzealous determination has in the past seen me actually join a gym, cut out chocolate, cut out crisps, cut out most of the foods that I enjoy but someone, somewhere is telling me I’m not allowed. One year I just vowed to try to be a ‘nicer person’ – clearly a year lacking in creativity and willpower. Come the first day back at school faced with a 7am alarm, an empty box of cereal and a freezing cold bus journey, that one went swiftly down the pan, as the bus driver can attest to.

I guess the sentiments behind New Year’s resolutions are generally to be admired — well-worn encouragement to eat healthily, exercise and generally try to be a better person can’t really be faulted. Or can it? It’s Christmas, I’m on holiday, just starting to settle in to that well deserved, luxurious bubble of having absolutely nothing to do when suddenly I’m pelted from all sides, not only with the realisation that collections are looming and that I’ve procrastinated away an entire month in front of the BBC’s (seriously disappointing) Christmas TV schedule. But also with the demand to stop enjoying myself and start belittling myself. Because really, the basis of any New Year’s resolution is essentially that; find something wrong with yourself and ruthlessly determine to change it. Furthermore, the feeling of self loathing is tripled by the inevitable failure to resist the family sized Dairy Milk bar at the bottom of the shopping bag or to drag yourself to the gym after working an 8 hour shift in the middle of the January sales.

So this year, like all the others, after realising I just cannot be bothered with the trauma of making a New Year’s resolution, I am not going to make one. Or maybe I will, I’ll make a handful of them. My New Year’s resolutions are to eat as much chocolate as I want without vomiting, make no effort to choose the vegetarian option in Hall to try to be healthier, exercise as little as possible and drink an excessive amount of alcohol throughout Hilary. All of which are fully achievable and will no doubt make me feel a lot better about myself.

2) On New Year’s Day, I had a revelation. I felt like utter shit. My head was pounding, my mouth tasted of sick, my tongue was furry, my eyes were blurry and my voice was gone along with my dignity. My tired, twenty-year old body wasn’t standing up as well to New Year frivolities as my lithe, teenage one had. This was my plan.

Give up the drink. Give up the grey mornings spent staring at the dull porcelain of the toilet and the mourning of headaches and pains and anxiety and paranoia. Give up forgetting what has happened the night before. Give up the disgraces and embarrassments. Give up the damaging of your finances, so often multiplied by poorly judged rounds. Give up the tiredness. Give up the long walks in a confused, lost state around areas you have known all your life. Give up putting on weight and damaging your teeth and the bruises sustained in fights. Give up the apologies made without any memory of what is being apologised for. Give up the sad realisation that the only time you can converse well with other human beings, laugh and feel like you have a connection to other people is when you have had at least two pints. Give up the horrible soul-searching over whether you owe or are indeed owed drinks. Give up the random chats with members of the public who at the time seem highly talkative and very engaged in conversation but are just bored and sober. Give up the drunken texts to parents or teachers or exes. Give up the frapes and apologising for the damage done by frapes. Give up the competitive conversations the next day about how much everyone drank. Give up the discovery that you can’t remember what the music was like. Give up the unbelievable struggle of working the next day. Give up the saddening feeling of having to lie on a doctor’s form because your mum is looking over your shoulder at the alchohol consumed section.

If there were this many reasons to give up anything else, you’d give it up too.

3) I’ve always been proud of my college. I admit it has its flaws- for example we’ve no spires, or gargoyles, or chapel or classic architecture, which defines most Oxford colleges. However, despite its lack of popularity, the Gatehouse building (if you’ve seen it, you’ll try to forget it) and our ‘humble’ campus (some of the staircases used to be the St John’s servants’ quarters), the one thing St Anne’s does have, and prides itself on, is its food. We like to eat. And we’ve won awards, you know. The time where the sustenance of our hall is at its best, when the cuisine is at the peak of succulence, when our kitchens are abundant with mouthwatering odours, is inevitably at our formal hall.

I was innocently talking to a friend at Queen’s about this exclusive event, and it got me to thinking that perhaps 2012 is the year where I will escape my cosy college comfort zone and have a taste of what you other colleges have to offer. So, reader, you’ve heard it here first; this year I resolve to eat at every Oxford College Formal Hall.

My first barrier for this ambitious challenge: I only know about ten people from different colleges. The second barrier: I don’t own enough fancy clothes. The third barrier: I have 24 weeks of Oxford term to try and squeeze in the other 37 college’s formals. Lets remain optimistic – it’s do-able right? All I have to do is somehow accumulate 37 new friends, each from a different college and persuade each ‘new friend’ into allowing me to tag along to dinner without gaining a reputation as the girl who invites herself everywhere (we all know one).

My bank balance will take a serious hit from my future 37 dinners, not to mention my waist size, but for the good of Cherwell, and of 2012: bring on the courses.

4) I’ve tried all the obvious resolutions: go to the gym every day, hand in all my work on time, don’t have Hassan’s on my way home every night. Invariably they decline throughout January until it’s third week and they’ve become: go to the gym once this term, hand in all my work at some point before finals, alternate evening meals between Hassan’s and Macdonalds, for variety’s sake. So this year, I’m jumping on my parents’ bandwagon and going for the slightly more pragmatic, although still highly beneficial, approach.

Firstly, I’ve decided to really make an effort to really avoid inappropriate moments. Seemingly simple, yes. But the breadth of this resolution means that firstly, it’s a good talking point. And, more importantly, I can choose to define its success as I see fit. It might seem that there’s not much involved in this, however, I can assure you that if I’d been as determined as I am now to stick to this last year, I would have avoided a not insignificant number of red-faced moments. If only I’d checked the ‘To:’ box on that e-mail that I sent to my tutor, not my tute partner, stating that: ‘I have no idea what I’ve even said in this essay. I’ve read an article and a half and I think one of those was about the wrong text. Please save me in this tute.’ I coud have saved myself a very miserable hour discussing why exactly it was that I’d only read half a relevant article. If only I hadn’t accepted the dare to walk into the Christ Church pizza van and try to teach them exactly ‘how I’d do it’ if I were a chef. Which I,of course, am not. I think I’ve made my point: with a little more consideration, my year could prove much less humiliating. And if it doesn’t work, then at least I’ll have some good sconce-fodder.

Secondly, I’m going to go to all of my lectures this term. Well, you need to have something unattainable, for tradition’s sake.