Tuesday, May 20, 2025
Blog Page 1817

Like a moth to a finalist

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A moth infestation in St Peter’s third year annexe on Thomas Street has caused havoc in the run up to finalists’ exams.

The college Bursar confirmed that the college would be taking action against Kingerlee, the company responsible for filling the roof cavity of the building and utility cupboards with inadequately treated wool, which attracted moths to rooms on the top floor of the building.

A spokesperson from St Peter’s said, “We noticed the problem early in the year and have done our best to treat the symptoms in order to minimise disruption to students. We have offered alternative accommodation but the students have opted to stay.”

One student living in the annex commented, “Some days I have killed literally hundreds of moths. My room is covered in splats, as is the corridor. It affects work as they fly around the desk lamp. Cooking utensils often have to be cleaned before use. Moths have flown into food and drink.”

The moths were first sighted in early January, and spread to lower floors in the building. Students contacted College officials in February and an extermination company sprayed the entire top floor in April.

Although this reduced the moth numbers for a few weeks, it failed to kill the root of the infestation and moths continue to irritate students taking finals.

The Bursar said, “The only solution is to remove the walls and ceiling and replace the insulation. We cannot do this until after Finals but the problem should be resolved before next term. The College will be pursuing a claim against the builder.”

JCR President Robert Collier said, “College staff have been extremely cooperative in helping the students through these unfortunate circumstances, and were very fair and reasonable during our discussion overcompensation.

“The college has immediate plans to remedy this situation before the beginning of Michaelmas.”

The JCR has negotiated an agreement on compensation for those students affected.

Kingerlee declined to comment.

Uni investments aren’t ‘armless’

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Concern over the morality of Oxford University’s investment in arms has this week resurfaced following an article published by the Oxford Anti-War Action Movement in journal The Lancet.

The article condemned University investments in “BAE systems, Raytheon, Lockheed Martin and other arms manufacturers” that totalled an average of £4.5 million a year from 2008 to 2010.

The investment in Lockheed Martin in particular was singled out. In April 2010 the University held £1.4 million worth of shares in the US-based company which manufactures cluster munitions, which are illegal in the UK.

“Saying you have a socially responsible investment policy while investing in cluster bombs and depleted uranium is like telling the world you’re tee-total while embarking on a binge”, said Ashley Inglis on behalf of the Anti-War Movement.

But Inglis says that their protests are having the desired effect. She explained, “There has been an instant response to our comment in The Lancet: it has been picked up by various journals worldwide.

“We predicted that the University’s image, already tarnished by its investments in the arms trade, would suffer further deterioration if the Council chose last June to ignore its ethical responsibilities and refuse to divest from arms manufacturers. This is now happening.

“The word has gone out far and wide that Oxford University has no ethical standards whatsoever.”

The University has however stressed that it regulates its investments carefully.

A spokesperson stated, “The Socially Responsible Investment Review Committee is responsible for looking at these issues. The University invests in funds, not individual companies.

“In June 2010, the Council of the University of Oxford set a restriction on the Fund regarding the direct ownership of companies whose activities contravene the Landmines Act 1998 and the Cluster Munitions (Prohibitions) Act 2010. OUEM Ltd reports compliance with this restriction regularly to the Investment Committee.”

However, the decision by the Council in June 2010 concluded that they would only monitor investments where they were “pooled” rather than “direct”.

Inglis argued that the social responsibility procedure is “not a policy but a procedure – a procedure for taking ethical concerns and passing them through a discussion process totally devoid of intellectual and moral rigour”, and highlighted the prominent role of companies such as BAE in selling arms to regimes such as Colonel Gaddaffi’s in Libya.

She added, “It’s time Oxford University showed some of the intelligence it’s supposed to be famous for, engaged seriously with this issue and divested from the arms trade.

“We will be writing to members of Council to draw their attention to our comment in The Lancet. Thereafter we are going to take this to Congregation, which represents the entire University, and which can force the Council to reconsider this deplorable situation”.

Student opinion seemed divided. Politics student Lauren Potter commented, “On the one hand arms investment can be beneficial to the security of our country and the protection of democracy and humanity.

“But when it is revealed that the University’s investments are supporting those such as Gaddaffi’s, a line has to be drawn. I don‘t want my money, even indirectly, to support such an immoral debacle.”

Hertford duck up on river

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As always, Summer VIIIs brought scenes of fierce competition and ruthless determination to the Isis. However, the greatest victim on Friday was not the pride of the losers, but a female mallard that was tragically killed on the river.

Hertford’s M2 boat, racing just past Donnington Bridge were startled to see the body of a duck, floating upside down near their stern between the boat and the bank. Although the exact circumstances of her death are, as yet, undetermined, it has been assumed that either a collision with the boat itself, or with one of the blades, brought about her untimely demise.

One of the rowers in the fateful boat, Gregory Lippiatt, denied responsibility, claiming, “To be fair, we don’t even know for sure if she was dead. I mean, she could have just been sleeping in an awkward position, or perhaps she was testing how long she could hold her breath.

“The fact that we were in the vicinity, thrashing about madly, blades going in all directions… well, there’s no way to know for sure that the two things aren’t a coincidence.”

His team-mate, Geoff Nelson, was more apologetic about the incident, saying, “Hertford M2 had no intention of killing any wildlife during our races. We would like acknowledge that this was a freak accident on the river. We apologize to Mother Nature for our transgression.”

Ex-rower Lucy Marriott, was horrified to learn of the incident, commented, “Ducks’ lives are precious! They deserve more rights than rowers, it’s their river after all.”

Despite such recriminations from duck-lovers across Oxford, one team member, Seaver Milnor, though not on the calamitous boat, defended his team-mates, “Though I don’t study Law, at least in my country ‘murder’ would require the intent to do bodily harm. This I suppose is a case of hit-and-run resulting in involuntary manslaughter, er, duckslaughter.”

One rower from Hertford stated, “M2 are rubbish, the only thing they could bump was a duck. They hit the duck as they crashed into the bank trying to escape a bump.”

Out of respect for their victim, the team took a moment of silence on Saturday when passing the spot where the duck breathed her last..”

An RSPCA volunteer confirmed to Cherwell that ducks do not have right-of-way on the river She did add however, that “Ducks are usually clever enough to get out of the way” and that in the dog-eat-dog (or indeed boat-kill-duck) world that we live in, “wildlife has to take its chances.”

Ex-Presidents clash before panel

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James Kingston, who was President in Michaelmas 2010, claimed that his successor James Langman was guilty of “action that was liable or calculated to bring the Society into disrepute” and “abuse of office with the intention of financially or materially benefitting the offender”.

This was in regard to Langman’s response to Kingston’s cancellation of Sri Lankan President Mahinda Rajapaska in Michaelmas 2010.

The Union released a statement at the time, explaining that the Sri Lankan President was cancelled due to security concerns and the “sheer scale of the expected protests”.

Langman allegedly then travelled to the Sri Lankan High Commission in London to apologise in person for the decision, extending an invitation for Rajapaksa to speak just a few days later, during his term as President.

Kingston, who had a finals exam in the afternoon, was not present at the hearing, and said he was “extremely unhappy” with the outcome.

“There has been a clear breach of natural justice in that neither I nor my witnesses were able to attend during exams”, Kingston said.

The panel decided that Langman had “no case to answer” in Kingston’s claims.

Sidders, who also organised the SDC hearing noted that complaints need to be heard within 28 days of being passed. She noted that Kingston had plenty of time to lodge a complaint without clashing his commitment to exams.

In a separate case, the SDC meeting cleared Hasan Ali and condemned accusations against him as “frivolous”.

Ali faced a vote of no confidence from fellow Standing Committee members in Hilary term for failing to host a guest speaker, and for providing “conflicting, contradictory and incompatible explanations of this failure to complete his official duties”.

Seeking to recoup some of the cost of the hearing, the panel fined ex-President Laura Winwood, and James Freeland £40 each. Ash Thomas, who was not present at the hearings, also received an £80 fine.

The Union said that Winwood and Freeland were fined less “in view of their candour and cooperation with the proceedings”. Thomas slammed the panel’s findings as “totally unjustified”.

Ali was initially condemned for “failure” to host a guest speaker and providing “conflicting, contradictory and incompatible explanations of this failure to complete his official duties” in a series of extraordinary meetings, held by the Standing Committee of the Union in 7th Week last term.

At that time Ali was running for President in Michaelmas 2011, although he later lost to Izzy Westbury in elections that were held on the Friday of 7th Week.

In a statement released by the Union, Ali said he was “relieved” by the committee’s findings.

However, he added, “It just worries me – and it should worry every member of the Union – that elections are no longer conducted on merit, rather, on the basis of who can smear whom the most in the student press.”

Railing against Grayling

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The New College of the Humanities this week faced vehement criticism and scepticism from students and academics alike.

Many have speculated that NCH, a privately funded university, is the answer to funding cuts to the humanities from the government, and that it will  rival to Oxbridge’s teaching standards.  

Niall Ferguson, a distiguished television historian who will teach at NCH said to Cherwell, “I am very enthusiastic about this venture and have been reading with incredulity some of the criticisms in the media this week.

“The best universities in the United States are, with a few exceptions, private institutions – not least my employer Harvard. The same can be said about the best secondary schools in Britain.” 

Ferguson continued, “Only a fool would oppose the creation of a liberal arts college like New College. Anyone who cares about the teaching of the humanities in Britain should be cheering on Anthony Grayling, and hoping that others will be emboldened to follow his example.”

However, students have condemned the university for the £18,000 annual tuition fee which only a small minority of privileged students will be able to afford. 

David Barclay, OUSU President slated the NCH, and stated, “The New College of the Humanities is a clear foretaste of the dystopian future the Coalition Government’s policies will lead the higher education sector into. 

“It is an affront to Oxford’s tradition of working to improve fair access to high quality undergraduate education, and yet more cause for the resounding vote of no confidence which we have now delivered to the Government.”

However, Dr Wendy Piatt, Director General of the Russell Group, said, “We welcome competition and we are relaxed about the growth in private universities, like the New College of the Humanities, as long as such institutions do not put significantly increased pressure on the already high-cost student support system.

“It would be unlikely that the NCH could join us if it is to be a teaching-only institution.”

India Lenon, a third year Classicist at New College, commented, “‘The founders claim that their new university will rival Oxbridge, but I’m not convinced this will be the case. 

“There will be two sorts of people who apply: students not bright enough to get into a good state-funded university, and students who are spellbound by either the word ‘Oxbridge’ or the ‘big names’ in the new place’s prospectus.”

Oxford Education Campaign have organised a protest next Friday, to greet Grayling when he arrives in Oxford to chair a talk at St. Antony’s College  to show their discontent at  this “unjust private institution”. OxEd Campaign urge students to “Fill in an application form online, telling them  you plan to win the lottery, rob banks, etc in order to pay the 54k”.

Musings on Brideshead

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When the curtain goes up on this new adaptation of Brideshead Revisited next week, nearly one thousand well oiled, Oxbridge code-breaking minds will judge me. Yes, ‘Ye shall be judged… ye shall be judged’, the words from Luke, 6.3738, echo back at me, like the tolling of a leaden knell. I have taken perhaps one of the most fiercely well-loved novels in the English language and I have transfigured it into just under two hours of theatre. This somewhat disturbing fact has induced me to muse, as the hour draws ever closer, on what actually makes a good adaptation of a novel in the first place.

As I have mentioned before, what I have chosen to bring out in this adaptation is the tragedy of the piece. In order to present Brideshead as a modern tragedy, I have written the play so that the audience is guided through it by Charles, its narrator who – in the manner of the narrator in Tennessee Williams’ The Glass Menagerie – will constitute the link between the audience and the action and, by sharing with the audience the reflections of his future self, will create an unbearable sense of dramatic and indeed tragic irony. Through the development of this close relationship between the protagonist and the audience, I hope that the audience will be able to take away Charles’ ultimate realisation about the futility of wasting one’s life in search of an idyll that never existed. This ultimate message is not as hopeless as it initially sounds. Charles’ belated arrival at a state of self-knowledge is preferable to never coming to this realisation at all, as is tragically the case with Sebastian.

I believe that the true power of Brideshead lies in its apocalyptic depiction of human interaction, centred on the self-destructive relationships between Charles, Sebastian, Julia and indeed the entire Marchmain family. In order to achieve this absolute focus, I have also reduced the number of superfluous characters that are required to people a novel, but have no place in an intense emotional drama. Although I have retained many of Waugh’s iconic lines from the novel, I was also compelled to write a lot of new material and even some entirely new scenes, the success or failure of which will on whether or not the timbre and register of my lines is identical to Waugh’s. I certainly hope it is.

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Ultimately, Brideshead is neither a paean to decadence and velvet smoking jackets, nor a celebration of the age-old Oxonian stereotype. It is simply the tragic and moving story of a man and his search for something to fill the empty void within himself and to alleviate the harshness of reality. Although at first glance, the trailer might suggest otherwise.

Interview: Emmy the Great

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It’s an often wondered-at paradox that to write meaningful songs, songwriters have to have significant life experience, yet as a professional musician that experience can be hard to come by. So when Emma-Lee Moss’ atheist fiancée suddenly left her for the church, amongst all the pain there was a small but crucial silver lining.

‘It was extraordinary. It happened overnight. I cried for days and days – and then I thought, oh god, but this is going to be so good for my career! All these emotions are such great material!’ She is able to laugh wryly about it now, but the pain of the situation is evident.

The album she had tentatively begun changed tack as she realised ‘that it had to be about this.’ Writing became a way of regaining strength, a ‘great comfort’: ‘It had to save me from what happened and keep me going. Writing an album allowed me to express what I thought and felt. It made me feel like a person again.’ The title of the album, Virtue, expresses what the album meant to her. ‘I’ve noticed that in fairy tales, women only make it through the woods when they keep their virtue. Little Red Riding Hood could only escape the wolf if she didn’t stray from the path. And that’s how I felt that summer – I could only get through this terrible thing if I stuck to my path’.

While the album obviously had to be personal, she never wanted it to be all about her. The album contains a backing vocals from a whole cast of characters, given names such as The Protagonist, Hysterical Ladies and Nuns, a deliberate decision: ‘They could be both me and not me’. The characters take their basis from stereotypes which she felt herself fitting into and reacted against. ‘We were only two months away from the wedding, and at that time I felt so much like a woman – I was a bride, one of the oldest and most universal cultural roles, and my experience of getting engaged is that you really feel the age of that tradition, the sheer volume of people who have been in your place with your feelings and anxieties and hopes. You can feel a million movie scenes, images of Diana, Jackie O, your own family mythology with its wedding photos down the generations, and to an extent you can say that you know exactly how they felt, because you felt it too. And then I was a jilted lover, and I’ve never felt so feminine. The first thing that pulled me out of my post-engagement funk was that the sense that we all have an opportunity to represent our gender in a positive way, and sitting about crying and not moving on with my life was not that. I want to write, like they say, what I know, and what I know is what it feels like to be a female in my situation. I don’t want it to be exclusively for women, though, I think if I’ve been as honest as I could about my feminine reactions to things, or concerns, then it should be interesting for men too.’

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Her last album, First Love, contains many narratives which are often shocking, notably one about a woman who has been raped and decides to keep the baby. Yet she has said that these situations are imaginary, for who could be alive if all these things had happened to them? This attitude to song-writing has continued: ‘I’m able to take a true situation and then change it how I want it. It can have its basis in reality but it doesn’t have to be the truth. Who’s to know? The Cinderella story goes back so many generations, and everyone has a different version, no-one knows which is the “real” version.’ Faced with a situation over which she had so little control, being able to manipulate situations like this must have been extremely empowering.

Fairy tales, Greek mythology and saints’ lives are important inspirations, creating a poignant mix of gritty reality and otherworldliness. ‘I love saints’ lives. They’re like the Hello magazine for past times. They’re what people fed on, they’re inspirational. When I was deep into reading about saints’ lives, I loved the idea of having a patron saint – a protector – but I was secular. I started to think about what my protectors could be, totems or emblems that made me feel watched over, and I started to pull these ‘protectors’, or personal saints, out of the songs. Sylvia and Iris (who wasn’t originally supposed to be Murdoch but it sort of works I guess), Trellick Tower, Cassandra, Hansel and Gretel (that one didn’t make it on the record)…They did genuinely make me feel stronger and I do genuinely still think of them alongside the album. I almost called it ‘Personal Hagiography’!’ She makes a face.

From hearing Emma speak, coming to terms with her fiancee’s new-found Christianity seems to have been a character-forming experience. ‘I read and read, I armed myself with knowledge so I could be totally informed.’ She even did an Alpha course, yet the deeper she got into religion, the more she found herself reacting against it. ‘I’ve been to churches where people have gone up to the front and claimed to be speaking through God, and I just want to tell them they’re wrong!’ Yet there is a spirituality to Emma, and she would not call herself an atheist but agnostic. ‘There are so many beautiful stories in the Bible, but they need to be taken as metaphor.’ She was turned off Dawkins having heard a story of his writing to a seven-year-old on her birthday to tell her that there was no soul – for Emma the soul is important, and is what can be nourished and bared through art. ‘Art is a window into the soul, a way of leaving something behind and expressing yourself.’ Yet she is not a poet: ‘You can get away with a lot more as a lyricist.’

Despite the success of her first album, a career in music is not set in stone for her. ‘I’m still deciding what I want to do with my life. I wonder if I should be a musician because music isn’t my whole being – I don’t care about the Rolling Stones and the Beatles. Books are my thing really, I’ve wondered about going into publishing. But if my music is pleasing others then that’s great, and it feels like the right thing to be doing now.’

In early days she sang backing vocals for Noah and the Whale, and has often been linked with the ‘nu-folk’ scene of artists including Johnny Flynn, Laura Marling and Mumford and Sons. But when I mention this she pulls a face: ‘I don’t understand why people always lump me together with them. I don’t see similarities between my music and Johnny’s music, though I like him very much as a person. I’d rather be likened to singers like Adele or Lily Allen. I wish people would ask me about other musicians – Lightspeed Champion, who made me, or Euan [Hinshelwood, her long-term musical collaborator who came up with the guitar palette for the album], whose band Younghusband is literally the other half of Emmy the Great. It’s weird I’ve never been linked to Three Trapped Tigers, when Tom and I have been working together for four years and he wrote all the piano parts for our music, but I do get linked to all these people who I have met a few times if at all.

‘I understand it’s a stylistic thing, but we feel like comparison is redundant because we were coming at the ‘folk’ (singer-songwriter is more appropriate) aspects from a different angle. We think in decades, we’re not trying to write in a particular style. I don’t mind what someone wants to term us as it’s personal to them, but ultimately I think the term ‘pop’ carries more opportunities. If we’re ‘folk’, I think it’s in the way that Leonard Cohen was ‘folk’, not because of our instruments or politics, but because the songs are lyric or story driven with a singer-songwriter at the centre of the arrangements. When we started out we wanted to sound like Glasgow-indie or Chamber pop, now we want to shake that off and move forward in a different way. I don’t know where we’ve ended up though. I always liked our Myspace music description “Salutations to the Goddess Mooncup”.’

I can’t survive ‘er

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Having woken up in a particularly foul mood this morning, I’ve decided to have a rant. The subject of this rant will be Beyonce and her sudden ability to piss me off, a lot, despite having been a pretty big fan of hers – yep I said it. This new found disdain was sparked by the video for her latest song ‘Rule the World’ . There’s so much wrong with the video, and the song for that matter that I don’t even know where to start, but here goes.

B is pretty much famous for having crazy videos, but they’re usually fun and uplifting, everything a pop video should be. I don’t know a single person who doesn’t love ‘All the Single Ladies’ and let’s face it we’ve all tried that dance move in our rooms at least once. Besides the overly dramatic intro which sees Beyonce dressed in white riding into some kind of wasteland on a black horse, it’s the used and overused trope of men versus women in a spontaneous dance- off is what really got under my skin. Furthermore the basic feminist rant that her lyrics suggest, ‘I’m repping for the girls who taking over the world’,  is slightly undermined by the fact that she is gyrating around wearing close to nothing in practically every scene of this five minute long piece of torture. Sure the dancing is a testament to a woman’s ability and freedom to use her sexuality and all that jazz but in the end she’s just using her body to sell the product, which sadly for us is a botched up mish mash excuse for a pop song. ‘My persuasion can build a nation’, GOD let’s hope not. Now I’m no prude, but there’s no way my kids will be taking their cue from Miss Knowles unless its from her Destiny’s Child days, now there’s a girl band who knew about good old family values, remember ‘Nasty Girl‘ what happened to that B?

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Wow, I sound like a jaded fan that’s been let down by their biggest idol crossed with a version of my grandmother! Nonetheless this vid just seems like a self indulgent form of megalomania, note the flag with Beyonce’s face on it at 0.07 seconds, it’s pretty hilarious. Having hyenas on chains like she’s some kind of Nigerian gangster is pretty outrageous too, it seems that Beyonce got lost somewhere on her way to super super stardom and now finds herself among the those narcissistic stars who just can’t tell when they’ve gone too far. Sadder still is the sheer shlockiness of the actual song.

Diplo has basically gone and shot himself in the foot, albeit a very lucrative injury, by collaborating with Beyonce on this one. The song makes little to no sense as it’s essentially five long minutes of B whining over misplaced interjections of that electro riff that we all loved so much circa Notting Hill Carnival 2009. I’m even sadder because Pon De Floor has now been ruined for me forever more. Never again will I be able to listen to Major Lazer without conjuring up the image of Beyonce licking her finger in a golden suit of armour, and that really pisses me off. There’s nothing worse than a non-song and the incessant drums and pulsating beat doesn’t come anywhere near to covering up the total lack of melody on this nauseating excuse for a song. I just wish B could return to making hits like ‘Crazy in Love’ now there’s a song you can groove to. I’d love to say that ‘Rule the World’ is just a – terrible terrible – slip in judgement but the video for one of her other recent songs has left me feeling hopeless, and I fear we’ve lost her forever. ‘Move your Body’ ends with Beyonce imploring us to ‘Wave the American flag’ I think I’ll pass on that one thanks. Allegedly having written more than 70 songs for the new album ‘4’ which drops on June 28th, I fear that the star has traded in quality for quantity, but I’m sure she won’t suffer from it. Her fan base is simply too devoted: check this out – warning its not that funny, but gets the point across.

My rant is over and because I hate to leave you on a low note, here’s a playlist of some good pop music from the finest female pop stars the world has to offer. These songs do exactly what they say on the tin. Enjoy!

PS: Having just found out that ‘Move Your Body’ is part of the American campaign to fight obesity I feel a little guilty for slagging it off… nevertheless the point remains, Beyonce’s love of tuneless songs with un-subtle lyrics is sad and underwhelming to say the least. Let’s hope there are a few bangers on ‘4’, I’m not sure how much longer I can listen to ‘Single Ladies’ on repeat.

The Placebo Effect

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The placebo effect is one of the best examples of ‘mind over matter’; we are able to affect our bodies through our beliefs. Most commonly referred to with respect to pharmaceuticals, a placebo is a simple sugar pill administered under the belief that it is a drug, which is found to have positive effects on an individual’s health. Many new drugs are sunk before reaching the market as they are no better than a sugar pill. The power of the placebo gives it use as a medicine, but some would argue that such deception is unethical. I would argue that this is not the case.

The scope of the placebo effect is wide. Sugar pills labeled as muscle relaxing drugs caused muscle relaxation, whilst the same pills labeled as stimulants induced muscle tension. When used as painkillers, placebos were found to be half as effective as aspirin and half as effective as morphine, despite morphine being a much more powerful painkiller.

A study of a valium-like drug found a yellow variant was preferable for treating depression, and a green one for anxiety.  Placebo capsules elicited stronger responses than placebo pills, whilst an injection of saline solution (with no known therapeutic effect) proved even stronger. Sham surgery, where a surgeon makes an incision and then pretends to perform an operation, was very effective, especially that involving hi-tech machinery.

To be effective, the deception involved must be well maintained. Participants under the illusion that a drug was more expensive were more responsive to its perceived effect. Branded packaging also proved more effective than bland boxes. This effect is not restricted to placebos: some people find branded, expensive ibuprofen to be more effective than supermarkets’ own brand products, only because its looks better and costs more.

The placebo effect is not limited to medicine, and can be observed in everyday life. Hotel cleaners told that cleaning hotel rooms constituted ‘good exercise’ lost weight and felt healthier. In the 19th century, patients were admitted to a local hospital with food poisoning symptoms, having been told tomatoes were poisonous. This is an example of the ‘nocebo’ effect – the reverse placebo effect.

What is the physiological basis of the placebo effect? It is unclear, but we believe that expectancy interacts with other neuronal and physiological systems. It is also suspected that association affects the patient. This was demonstrated by having patients take genuine medicine with a sweet drink, then observing the drink elicit the response of the medicine. However, research into the placebo effect is difficult:  from an ethical perspective, the researcher is deliberately withholding medicine from an ill patient.

This is the key point; many believe that lying to a patient and providing ‘fake’ medicine goes against a doctor’s role, and undermines the doctor-patient relationship. Some individuals are less susceptible to the placebo effect, and withholding proper medicine from these individuals is dangerous. As mentioned, the placebo must be dressed up and priced as genuine medicine, leading to fears that patients could be overcharged for useless, fancy looking skittles. 

However, there are cases where placebos are more useful than genuine medicine. Patients suffering from severe burns cannot be given morphine (due to respiratory problems associated with); a placebo painkiller can be of great relief. Similarly, over prescription of antibiotics can lead to drug resistant bacteria, a problem solved by prescribing placebos to less serious cases.

A placebo need not be administered dishonestly. It has been shown to work where patients were told they would receive pills ‘whose mechanism is unclear’. And whether or not the doctor is truthful to the patient, a doctor’s ultimate role is to aid recovery, and if a placebo is the most effective way of doing so, it should be considered unethical not to prescribe it.

The placebo effect demonstrates the incredible power of the mind over the body. It also asks the question as to whether it is acceptable to deceive patients for with the aim of helping them. The issue comes down to your belief in the role of the doctor; to be honest with the patient or to relieve the patients suffering. Placebos have the unqiue ability to make these two qualities mutually exclusive. 

Carry On…Up The Eiger

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Last week England were left humiliated by one Swissman as an unopposed Sepp Blatter walked into a fourth term as FIFA President having fended off English Football Association Chairman, David Bernstein’s impassioned call to postpone the FIFA Presidential elections. On Saturday that same embarrassment was replicated by a factor of eleven, as a dogged Switzerland dug out a credible draw against a distinctly average England team. England’s lamentable performance may not have been as laugh out loud funny as that of a Carry On film but it certainly displayed its fair share of farce – comical defending, tactical conservatism and selection queries – providing further evidence that the lessons of South Africa are still to be learnt.

First and foremost Capello’s starting XI was wrong. Whilst many point to the omission of Aston Villa winger Ashley Young, who picked up the Man of the Match award in England’s last European Qualification game against Wales and scored the crucial equalizing goal when he came on as a second half substitute on Saturday, with Manchester City midfielder James Milner playing in his place, questions should perhaps be asked about the central defensive pairing of Rio Ferdinand and John Terry, midfielder Frank Lampard’s contribution and Aston Villa striker Darren Bent. Ferdinand and Terry may be the two most experienced central defenders in English football however their lack of pace was clearly exposed by the impressive Swiss midfielders Tranquilo Barnetta (Bayer Leverkusen) and Xherdan Shaqiri (FC Basel) and striker Eren Derdiyok (Bayer Leverkusen) who provided a constant threat down both flanks and from the long ball over the top of the back four. Their communication and general marshalling of the defensive line was poor, no more so than from set pieces. Both players are, perhaps more so Ferdinand, prone to injury and perhaps the constantly impressive Phil Jagielka of Everton and Michael Dawson of Tottenham Hotspur, who demonstrate both pace and aerial ability, should be given more chances.

Indeed, pace was a key element which was missing both from the defence and in central midfield. Whilst young Jack Wilshere – one of the few bright sparks in an otherwise lackadaisical England performance – at the age of nineteen continues to impress, working tirelessly, exhibiting an abundance of creativity and a change in pace, the same cannot be said of his compatriot, Frank Lampard. There’s no doubt that Lampard in a Chelsea shirt has been consistently excellent for a number of years but you feel that his days in an England shirt are numbered. Perhaps the long season caught up with him more so than other England players however the thirty-two year old was left trailing behind the youthful exuberance of the Arsenal midfielder. He was often overpowered by his opposite number – the tall, athletic Swiss Captain Gökhan Inler, linked with a possible summer move to Arsenal. Alongside the former West Ham United midfielder, Valon Behrami, the Udinese man, was commanding, showing a good distribution of the ball to his wide men. He broke up England’s attacks well, especially in the second half, and you wonder how England would have faired with a fully fit Owen Hargreaves to fulfil that same role?

Although England undoubtedly exhibited pace going forward through the likes of Wilshere and Walcott, questions remain about Walcott. Whilst he has a natural burst of pace, I remain concerned about his ability to both deliver a killer through ball to the striker(s) and where his best position is. Predominantly used my club manager Arsène Wenger as an out an out right winger, Walcott has occasionally started up-front playing off the main striker. Unless he does find a regular position, you feel that he could well become a utility player for England. In some ways he boasts the same traits as Tottenham Hotspur winger Aaron Lennon, although Lennon’s final ball has notably improved over the season – something which Walcott must work on. If Capello was looking for delivery from the wide areas, then surely the likes of Manchester City’s Adam Johnson and Aston Villa’s Stewart Downing should have been at the forefront of the Italian’s mind. Downing would have provided the perfect foil for striker Darren Bent with the two of them having developed a good understanding during their time at Aston Villa whilst Johnson, who wasn’t even selected on the England substitute’s bench, has undoubtedly been one of the Barclays Premier League’s most consistent wingers.

Whilst England possess a wealth of midfield players, the same cannot be said of the strikers. Capello named Darren Bent as the lone striker in the 4-3-3 formation flanked either side by Walcott and Milner however Bent once again failed to seize on the opportunity to prove himself on the international stage. He may have finished as the leading English goalscorer in the Barclays Premier League Season but his performance, encapsulated by blowing a golden opportunity to win the game for England in the final quarter of the game, demonstrated both how Bent is yet to make the transition between the domestic and international stage and how badly England missed the suspended Wayne Rooney’s running power and creativity. Furthermore, Capello’s decision to select Bobby Zamora ahead of Peter Crouch, who has scored 22 goals in 42 England appearances, on the substitute’s bench was another show of conservatism and, if reports are to be believed, has prompted the Tottenham Hotspur’s striker to consider his international future. Arguably it has been Capello’s inability to find a suitable strike partner for Rooney, having tried out the likes of Bolton Wanderers’s Kevin Davies and even dropping down into the Npower Championship with Jay Bothroyd from Cardiff City which has been one of the factors which has led him to revert to a 4-3-3 formation – something which he now appears very reluctant to diverge from.

Following the abysmal showing in South Africa, calls were made for England to scrap their inflexible and outmoded 4-4-2 system and change to a more European 4-3-3 system. The change in formation which has since taken place since has bore fruits for England with the midfield three often overpowering the opposition, albeit of a lower calibre, and providing the wingers with a licence to attack and get in support of the lone striker. Nonetheless, the system has its limitations, with the principal concern being that of how to accommodate players in their chosen position? For example, with Rooney expected to be reinstated back into the starting XI, do you play him on the wing and allow him to get in support of the striker or risk playing him up-front on his own knowing that he is not suited to the role of a lone striker? Furthermore, such a system requires keeping possession with intent – something which England were poor at doing on Saturday. They have to learn to not go for the hit and hope long ball option but rather to be patient in possession and in the process wear down the opposition – something which the Swiss did do effectively.

Ottmar Hitzfeld’s team, which famously conquered World Champions Spain at last year’s World Cup, proved that they were no walkovers. They played like a team reinvigorated perhaps as a result of the retirement of some of the old guard, namely record scorer Alexander Frei and strike partner Marco Streller. And whilst doubts still remain in central defence with the Barclays Premier League pairing of Arsenal’s Johan Djourou and Fulham’s Philipe Senderos appearing unconvincing on a number of occasions, it was in midfield where the Swiss particularly impressed. Inler and Behrami, the former in particular, distributed the ball well and made full use of wingers Barnetta and Shaqiri. The young man from FC Basel, Shaqiri, making his eleventh appearance for his country caught the eye with a number of surging runs and was not afraid to test Joe Hart in the England goal. Hitzfeld acknowledges that qualification for next year’s European Championships is virtually impossible and so he has taken this opportunity to blood new players such as Shaqiri into the first team, which has already paid dividends and is something which Capello should be actively considering with the likes of Gary Cahill, Daniel Sturridge and Andy Carroll all looking to follow in the footsteps of the already established Jack Wilshere.

However, it appears that Capello is afraid to make any radical changes to his team, especially in personnel. Perhaps he feels that some of the players in his squad are simply not yet ready to progress to the next level or that the pool of talent from which he has to pick is simply not good enough. All of these are reasonable excuses however the Italian, who possesses a wealth of footballing knowledge, must acknowledge that at times he must be bold. His move to bring on Ashley Young at halftime was brought about both by the context of the game but also a realisation that his conservative approach had failed miserably and that a change of pace and energy was needed. He must also communicate to the players that they should not be afraid to make mistakes and that possession is of a paramount importance when playing the 4-3-3 system. Nonetheless, with communication between the manager and the players appearing to be an ongoing problem, that despite the Italian having three and a half years in which to get to grips with the language, you wonder whether he’ll be able to effectively communicate this message to them before England once again resume their European Qualification campaign in early September.

Capello’s men sit at the top of the group on goal difference thanks to Montenegro failing to take advantage of England’s slip up with a home draw against Bulgaria. England still remain favourites to progress from Group G and onto next year’s European Championships in Poland and Ukraine however two consecutive home draws in their European Qualification matches have made their task just that bit harder. They now face two testing away trips to Bulgaria and nearest-rivals Montenegro in September and October respectively, which will be a real test of the team’s resolve. The FA and, particularly, England fans will be hoping not to see a repeat of the events of 21st November 2007. We all know what happened then.