Wednesday 25th June 2025
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‘Ornamented choral what?’ – your favourite early sacred music like you’ve never heard it before

Anna Cowan
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‘Ornamented choral what?’ – your favourite early sacred music like you’ve never heard it before

Known affectionately among members and fans as ‘Old Document’, Antiquum Documentum was founded in Hilary Term 2022 by Alexander Trowell and Jarek Jankowski whilst sat at a table in the King’s Arms. They were joined shortly thereafter by Daniel Greenway and Iris Oliver and, as conversations in the King’s Arms often go, they observed that Oxford’s niche for ornamented choral polyphony remained bemusingly unfilled. What is ‘polyphony’? I hear you cry. Why is it ‘choral’ and what makes it ‘ornamented’? The group that the five subsequently founded specialises in a distinctive style of singing, which takes the multi-voice music you might hear in your college chapel on a Sunday, and, after intense investigation into the earliest manuscripts of the music to find the most original form of the notes, they essentially sing with frills, adding ululations in certain carefully considered places, and thereby producing a very ancient sound in what are (to choral singers) often familiar pieces. It’s 15th, 16th and 17th century sacred music like you’ve never heard it before! The ‘ornamented’ style of singing declined in the western European church, but remained a significant part of ritual in the church in east Europe, most famously perhaps in Byzantine chant which you might have heard at the Coronation last Saturday. Antiquum Documentum describe themselves as ‘specialising in early sacred vocal music, particularly in historical performance-practice with historical pronunciation, pitch and ornamentation.’ Since the group’s foundation Antiquum Documentum has gained twelve members and performed three successful concerts, although they appear perhaps most proud of their exquisitely detailed posters, which you have probably seen around Oxford. On Tuesday of seventh week last term they performed again in Keble chapel to an audience of around seventy, offering a programme of ten pieces from the Papal Curia (the area of Italy under the jurisdiction of the Papacy), which demonstrated the depth and breadth of talent which the group has fostered over the last year.

The concert began with ‘Improperia’ by Victoria, blossoming out of the silence of the chapel with closely layered harmonies. The tutti (‘all singers’) sections, were beautified by movement in the tenors and altos, and interleaved with solo tenor recitative (‘singing-speaking’), cantored expertly by Jarek Jankowski, then tied cleanly and plaintively with an emphasised ‘responde me’, ‘answer me’. Then followed Josquin DesPrez’s setting of ‘De profundis’, a piece significant in representing the international nature of the Sistine Chapel during the 16th and 17th centuries. The voices rose into sound one after another, mimicking of the vocative theme of the text: ‘Out of the deep have I called unto thee, O Lord; Lord hear my voice’, set low in the ensemble’s registers to create a cavernous quality. The lowest voices, the basses, created rumbling, drone-like lines, which the richly ornamented, Byzantine-sounding tenor lines cut through with higher, plaintive phrases.

This third concert by Antiquum Documentum was set apart from the first two in welcoming Keble’s junior organ scholar Edward Gaut on the chamber organ. Ally explains that the music of their programme is likely to have been accompanied by mellow chamber organ accompaniment, and would have been for certain in the Roman churches under Papal control, other than the Sistine Chapel, notably St Peter’s Basilica. Edward accompanied the sung repertoire and performed two solo pieces by Frescobaldi; ‘Recerdar dopo il credo (Messa della Madonna)’ and ‘Toccata per l’Elevatione (Messa delli Apostoli) later in the programme. Without the pressure-responsiveness of a piano with strings, the piped chamber organ relied on precision and careful articulation to communicate the swelling, emotional phrases of the solo pieces. Edward achieved this to great effect and proved an engaging addition to the choral programme. 

Their next piece, Allegri’s setting of Psalm 51 ‘Miserere’, (‘Have pity on me’) is known to have been composed for the Sistine Chapel in 1638 to be sung as part of the liturgy in Holy Week, the week leading up to Easter, which is the most holy week of the Christian year. Allegri’s ‘Miserere’ has a certain mythology attached to it. Making copies of the piece was forbidden, and all original copies could not be removed from the Sistine Chapel, yet it is said that the piece made it into the outside world via pirate copies made by a young Mozart who could simply remember the whole piece. Antiquum Documentum gave a shimmering rendition of this classic, but in its more original form. The version we know today was in fact based on a copying error which transposed the famous solo line up to a top C, and special mention must be made of soprano Lois Heslop for her crystalline performance of this now iconic accident of transmission. Jarek Jankowski returned with remarkable technical skill cantoring alternate verses with bubbling, flowing ornamentation, between beautiful tutti sections, aching with tension.

The group’s next piece, ‘Ave Regina Cælorum’ (‘Behold the queen of Heaven’) by Victoria, provided a satisfying contrast to the yearning Miserere. Antiquum Documentum brought warmth to the piece’s close, concentric harmonies and concluded with a jubilant ‘gaude’, ‘rejoice’, before moving to their sixth item, Palestrina’s ‘Sicut cervus’ (‘Like as the hart’). This more layered piece was characterised by long drawn-out melodies, admirably sustained by the singers, and melisma, single words drawn out over multiple notes, echoed smoothly between the parts.

To conclude the first segment of the concert, the tempo picked up again with Anerio’s ‘Christus factus est’ (‘Christ became obedient’), the Allegro (‘lively’) sections of which were another engaging contrast and demonstrated the group’s careful attention to keeping the programme fresh throughout.

Then followed a short address from Ally on the theme which characterised final pieces of the concert: the Crucifixion. A chant-like plainsong ‘Agnus Dei’ (‘the Lamb of God’) from the Graduale di Tempore (1614) for two voices, was executed cleanly by tenors Ally Trowell and Jarek Jankowski, and the concert concluded with Palestrina’s immense ‘Stabat Mater’ (‘The sorrowful mother was standing’). The text of this final piece describes the immense grief of the Virgin Mary watching her son Jesus perishing on the Cross. The piece opened out into monumental depth with great quasi-Romantic swells, emotively communicating the pity of the Crucifixion through the great feeling with which the singers imbued the text. The lower voices of the group sang with great richness, over which the duet movement of the upper voices moved to great effect. Ornamentation welled up within the texture, setting it well within the programme as the piece drew the motifs of the concert together. Having looked at over a century of repertoire of Roman polyphony, from Josquin in the late 15th century and Allegri in the early 17th, the Stabat Mater ended the concert at a halfway point – the high Renaissance – which acknowledged both the styles that preceded it and the emerging Baroque that would soon sweep Europe. 

The concert concluded to rapturous applause, which was very well deserved! Overall Antiquum Documentum created an ethereal, transportive atmosphere, with choral music unlike any other in Oxford. I offer Antiquum Documentum my congratulations for such a successful and professional performance, and look forward to hearing them again on Tuesday of 4th Week (16th May) for Choral Evensong in Latin with music by Tallis, Morley and Weelkes. 

What happens at Port and Policy?

Paul Furey
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What happens at Port and Policy?

A crowd of eager onlookers encircle a suited man like they are watching a schoolyard fight. He is giving a port-fuelled passionate advocation for the invasion of France. This is Port and Policy.

Every Sunday of term the Oxford University Conservative Association (OUCA) holds their famous Port and Policy event. Since 1994 it has attracted the most conservative—and some not-so-conservative—minded students from the University to attend. The alumni of OUCA include past Prime Ministers such as Margaret Thatcher, David Cameron, and Theresa May, and high-profile MPs like Jacob Rees-Mogg and the Chancellor of the Exchequer, Jeremy Hunt.

On Facebook OUCA promises “a night of vigorous discussion and plenty of port to go round”. On the first Sunday of Trinity term they hosted a specially themed Port and Policy to mark the eve of Saint George’s Day—suitably patriotic. They had a first motion to match that spirit, “This house would slay the dragon”. Additionally, they advertised “This house would cross the picket lines” and a secret third motion to be revealed on the night. 

The venue is St Giles’ Church on Woodstock Road. Members of the OUCA committee give assurances that they are usually able to procure the Oxford Union and that this was simply a temporary setting. It certainly did not give the impression of the home of Oxford’s nearly one-hundred-year-old conservative association. It was more like a tacky parish hall with board games on display on the shelves. It was no bigger than my tutor’s office.

Arriving slightly after the posted start time of 8:30pm, we are immediately greeted by a very keen treasurer. He is excited to tell us we are paying the first entry fees (£8) under his reign. At this point, it is clear we are the only people here besides the obligated OUCA committee members. It is also clear that I am underdressed compared to the rest of the attendees who have stuck to the lounge suit dress code in a stricter sense. But no paying customer is turned away from OUCA when they have cash in hand.

They are busy folding up tables, clearing the hall, and stocking a makeshift bar with port. At the front of the church hangs a ten-foot Union Jack and a five-foot Saint George’s Cross. In front of them stands a small table with an empty bottle of port and cutting board.

We stand around in groups until a bellowing voice, the voice of a character we would later learn to be the political officer, sounds out: “get some alcohol!” The bar was open. 

OUCA offers three options for port: fine white, tawny, and ruby. We found none to be particularly appealing. Further research priced each bottle at £5 a pop.

Eventually the church hall slowly fills up, and around 80 people end up being in attendance. Shortly after 9pm the proceedings begin. The political officer grabs our attention by using the very sturdy, empty bottle of port as a makeshift gavel and smashing it against the chopping board.

With no microphones in place, Port and Policy relies on the strength of the speaker’s ability to shout to be heard. About half of the people speaking possess this ability, the rest get lost in the chatter between onlookers and the disinterested port enthusiasts.

First are some announcements. These cover the policy of no photos being taken as well as the news of a party to be held that week. The theme—Thatcher’s Golden Years. They also announce the policy on heckling. It is very much encouraged.

For any “good conservative Thatcherites” the crowd is to shout out “sound!”, as opposed to the boos that serve as the response to a “commie Blairite”. If any committee member speaks it is good practice for the crowd to shout “Resign!”.

The first debate begins: Would this house slay the dragon? The political officer bangs his gavel and calls for anyone in the crowd to speak in proposition.

The first speaker gives his interpretation of the dragon and why it should be slain. “The dragon is the Chinese Communist Party – Burn it to the ground!”. He is met with cheers of “sound!”. When he finishes, the political officer pounds his gavel again and then calls for a speaker in the crowd for the opposition. This process repeats itself until the debate finishes. 

Most speeches are no longer than a few sentences, a whole debate seemed to average about half an hour. A key difference between the debates at Port and Policy and, say, those at the Oxford Union, is that no one takes the debate at Port and Policy seriously. Everyone who steps up to speak is, by and large, doing it for a laugh.

A speaker in opposition to the motion proclaims “We should banish the snakes, not slay the dragon – accept Saint Patrick, not Saint George”. He is immediately followed by a speech in proposition, “we are Protestants today” he cries out. “Slay the Antichrist!” Port and Policy debates don’t shy away from current political events. It is suggested that the dragon could represent “a useless civil service that can’t be told to do any work” in solidarity with Dominic Raab.

There were proposals to not slay the dragon, but simply fox hunt the dragon. Or not slay the dragon, but simply slay. However, the most convincing argument seemed to be that the house should not slay the dragon, as what is a dragon if not a Tory? “It just sits on a hoarded pile of wealth”. Nonetheless, the ‘ayes’ took the motion decisively: this house would slay the dragon.

The debate that followed was titled “This house would cross the picket line”. There was now noticeably less interest from the crowd as the chatter grew and the queue for port lengthened. Nearly all speakers were inaudible so we resorted to mingling among the attendees. Most were regulars at Port and Policy. “What else would you do with £8 on a Sunday?”

Indeed, a few were more liberal-minded, who boasted they only came to laugh at and, when they went up to speak, rile up the tories. It was all in the spirit of good fun and much less serious, they told us, than the ‘Beer and Bickering’ at Labour Club. Fittingly, a commotion of ‘boos’ erupted from the debating circle as another speaker exclaimed proudly, “the best thing Margaret Thatcher ever did was die”. 

The second debate ended with another victory for the ‘ayes’: unsurprisingly, this house would cross the picket line.

Finally, it was time for the long-awaited secret third motion to be revealed. It didn’t disappoint. “This house would invade France”, the political officer roared. This was the type of absurd motion that recaptured the full crowd’s attention. It set off the starting gun for a competition for who could make the most outrageous statement and get the biggest roar from the spectators. What proceeded was an onslaught of smears on the French nation advising invasion. 

“They smell and are stupid”. “We’d have a good time doing it.” “F*ck the froggy b*stards.” “We must cross the Channel for the croissant. Seize the croissant!” “This house would invade France because this house is a gamer.” One rallying cry played into the gender makeup of the observers. “We will dominate France, like you would like to be dominated by a woman. Many of you have never seen a woman in the flesh!”

There was concern that the motion did not go far enough. “As has been seen, the Channel is too easy to cross. It should be made wider. Destroy France!” A small contingent maintained throughout that France did not actually exist. “France is a lie propagated by Big Cheese.”

The main stumbling block for OUCA was that a sizable proportion had their hearts set on the restoration of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland. “If we are going to invade a neighbouring republic, let it be the Irish people.”

In the end, the ‘ayes’ won for a third time. This house would invade France.

With the final debate concluded, at almost precisely 11pm, the OUCA committee congregates to the front of the hall and belt out ‘God Save the King’. With that, everyone heads to Spoons to finish the night.

The main feature of Port and Policy is students LARPing as ultra-conservatives for a laugh. Their outrageous declarations always lapped up by the crowd. Nothing is said in seriousness. But as seen in the strong representation of OUCA alumni in UK governments past and present, these people are likely to go on and lead the country in some capacity in the future.

It is a stark realisation that the speeches decried at Port and Policy will inevitably echo into the behind-closed-doors discussions in Westminster offices.

Kevin and Timmy sit in the Old College Gardens

Sean Hartnett
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Kevin and Timmy sit in the Old College Gardens

Honorary degree recipients to include former UN High Commissioner for Human Rights

Andy Wei
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Honorary degree recipients to include former UN High Commissioner for Human Rights

The University of Oxford has revealed the list of eight people who will be receiving an honorary degree this year. Each recipient has demonstrated outstanding achievement in their field, and they will be celebrated at the Encaenia ceremony at the end of Trinity term.

Here are this year’s recipients:

Professor Frances Arnold is an American chemical engineer at the California Institute of Technology. She received the 2018 Nobel Prize in Chemistry “for the directed evolution of enzymes.” On the topic of enzymes, she told Cherwell: “I’m thrilled that Oxford is honouring science, engineering, and evolution—the most powerful, and enduring, of all design processes. And enzymes. Let’s not forget about enzymes, because they are pretty great chemists.”

Michelle Bachelet is an impressive Chilean politician who served two terms as President of Chile and one term as the United Nations’ High Commissioner for Human Rights. As President, she created marine protection areas, expanded social protection for women and children, and promoted renewable energy. She was also the founding Executive Director of the United Nations Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women. 

Lyse Doucet is a Canadian journalist who currently serves as BBC’s Chief International Correspondent. She covers pressing events around the world and presents on BBC Radio 4, BBC News, BBC World Service radio, and BBC World News television.

Professor Stephen Furber is a computer engineer at the University of Manchester. He was previously a principal designer of the BBC Microcomputer and the ARM 32-bit RISC microprocessor, and he now leads research into neural systems engineering. He told Cherwell: “I’m very much looking forward to what I hope will be a sunny summer solstice, falling on the 75th anniversary of the Manchester Baby Machine’s first successful execution of a program stored in its electronic memory. It is, of course, a great honour to receive this distinction from the University of Oxford, which ranks among the world’s greatest universities, and I feel very privileged to have this association with Oxford.” The Manchester Baby was the world’s first electronic stored-program computer and was built at the University of Manchester in 1948.

Professor Paul Gilroy is a cultural and social theorist at University College London. He has made significant contributions to critical race theory and Black British culture. He has authored several books, lectured around the world, and serves as the founding director of the UCL Sarah Parker Remond Centre for the Study of Racism and Racialisation.

Val McDermid is a prolific Scottish writer. Her 39th novel, Past Lying, will be released later this year. Her previous novels have sold over 18 million copies and been translated into more than 40 languages. She told Cherwell: “When I became the first Scottish state school pupil to be accepted at St Hilda’s when I was only 16, I thought that was honour enough. I never dreamed that one day I’d have an Honorary Doctorate conferred on me. To say I’m thrilled and delighted would be an understatement and I’m looking forward to the celebrations.”

Professor Malik Peiris is a Sri-Lankan virologist at the University of Hong Kong. He was the first person to isolate the SARS virus in 2003, helping prevent a pandemic. He has previously advised the World Health Organization and the Hong Kong government on public health.


Professor Sir Simon Schama is a historian at Columbia University. He is also a contributing editor of the Financial Times, the author of 20 books, and the writer-presenter of 60 documentaries on art, history and literature for BBC television. He will be discussing his most recent book, which covers “the history of pandemics, vaccines and the health of nations,” at the Oxford Literary Festival on May 22nd.

Overworked and underpaid: testimonies of Oxford’s scouts

Anandita Abraham
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Overworked and underpaid: testimonies of Oxford’s scouts

The kitchen was scrubbed this morning, but Pam’s* superior runs her fingers across the kitchen walls and holds them up to the light, then says to clean the walls again. I ask Pam about the rash above her wrist and she says it’s the detergent. The scouts I speak to take the early buses into Oxford. They have grandchildren. Some have lived in this country for 35 years, others fled armed conflicts in Eastern Europe to come to the UK. Some are not permitted smoking breaks and are terrified of picking up a call from their kids abroad, fearing that superiors might see them on the phone. 

Only two other British universities have equivalents of the scout system, where housekeeping has to navigate a hazardous student habitat to clean toilets and kitchens, make beds and hoover rooms, serve tea to guests over the vacation, and sometimes act as a welfare checkpoint. At other universities a rota in the kitchen determines who takes out the rubbish that week.

“Money is never enough”

Scouts (or ‘bedders’, as they are known at Cambridge) knock to collect trash and, at some colleges, enter unannounced. Many students find these awkward run-ins embarrassing or bothersome, and are quick to lash out at scouts, who didn’t make the rules. Cleaning the living space of routinely stressed students is a thankless job – and an underpaid one. 

 “[The] money is never enough”, Pam says to me when I ask why a 70-year-old scout with a bad knee can’t retire. Oxford Worker Justice is a student campaign that demands information from colleges about pay and other details in order to generate a ranking of colleges according to their adherence to the Oxford Living Wage (OLW). The OLW, at £10.50 at the time of inquiry earlier in the year, is a “liveable minimum pay” set by the City Council to reflect the high costs of living in Oxford. Eight colleges’ lowest wages were below the OLW and 16 colleges say they do not intend to increase wages to align with the OLW, which as of April is £11.35. Some colleges, including Christ Church and Balliol, have since told Cherwell that they will uplift salaries in line with the Oxford Living Wage this spring.

When Oxford Worker’ Justice requested information on wages in 2021, other colleges justified lower wages by saying staff had non-wage benefits like access to (public) parks or gifted chocolate at Christmas. Only ten colleges have an OLW accreditation, which is a scheme for employers to commit to pay the OLW. It should also be noted that colleges including Christ Church provide some monetary benefits for supplementary work including conference benefits. 

A decentralised system

The poor pay stems in part from the prevalence of subcontractors in hiring Oxford’s scouts. Most colleges use agency staff, with Keble and LMH topping the list of most agency staff employed. This reduces administration costs and makes hiring and firing more flexible, and scouts hired through agencies often experience unique challenges. Lucy, who works with Oxford Worker Justice, says that reporting to chains of authority in both college and the agency may make for a worse work environment. 

When her colleague for the building takes leave, a scout I speak to has to clean four floors instead of two without extra remuneration. There is no direct line through which to express grievances to employers as colleges are not their direct employer. Furthermore, the University does not regulate the hiring practices of colleges because colleges are “independent of the University and are independent employers”.  2021 statistics corroborate the job insecurity subcontracted workers face. Agency staff at Corpus Christi, at that time, rarely stayed in the job longer than three months. Even those who are still in a job are not guaranteed consistent work and pay, as some colleges still employ zero-hour contracts, so staff are left without work for weeks at a time.

Lucy says no college is breaking the law on the living wage, but many do not or cannot provide details on sensitive topics like whether they use agencies, or details of measures taken during the pandemic for health and safety. Oxford Worker Justice launched a petition during the pandemic in response to reports that during the lockdown college staff had to work without Personal Protective Equipment (PPE). Pam experienced this and says she was terrified to have to clean the bathroom a student with COVID was using. 

I ask Pam why in her years as a scout she hasn’t heard talk of unions. “They think there’s no point,” she says. Lucy from Oxford Worker Justice echoes this sentiment. She believes the college system “creates a different dynamic to other [universities] where there is one institution to put pressure on”. The lack of a centralised employer creates an insular environment so scouts have no wider channel of interaction with those at other colleges. Oxford Worker Justice used to run small groups at the now-closed East Oxford Community centre with the hope of directing workers to general unions like IWGB and UNISON that seek to represent college workers. Turnout to these meetings was, however, low. 

Isolation, fear and inequality

When I reach out to friends to get them to put me in touch with their scouts, a common problem is the language barrier. At some colleges less than 30% of the staff are British. A majority of workers at St Anne’s in 2021, for example, were EU citizens. An old Cherwell investigation reported of colleges such as Jesus asking scouts to use Anglicised names, claims that were later denied by the college. I’m told that a college worker who spoke at a rally claimed that the norm of targeting immigrants for jobs emerged because they are least likely to complain, and most likely to fear the repercussions of speaking up. Lucy says it is clear that in more ways than one, “the system is designed for it to be difficult for them to ask for more … to advocate for themselves”.

Up until the 70s, scouts at Oxford were called “servants”. I am struck by anecdotes about vomit in sinks, rotting food dripping through fridges, and Lucy tells me that overwhelmingly, “scouts just wish students just didn’t do sh*tty things that make their jobs more difficult”. An article in the Telegraph by a graduate argues that “the artificial bubble of college life at Oxbridge is perhaps unlike anywhere else in the world for how it compresses privilege and poverty”. Due to language barriers, memories of bad confrontations, and a sometimes fear-fuelled work environment, scouts may find it daunting to even tell residents how hard the students make their work. 

The pay gap at this world-renowned university between the yearly earnings of minimum wage workers (scouts, kitchen staff, porters, maintenance) and maximum wage employees (over £100K/year) will continue to grow if more colleges do not commit to the Oxford Living (subsistence) Wage. For scouts, Lucy suggests that “the knowledge [of better pay at other colleges] is enough to get that increase”. 

Scouts want fairer pay and better treatment. The system needs reform that favours people like Pam, who tells me that all she wants is “some bl**dy respect”. 

*name has been changed for anonymity

Charts created by Oxford Worker Justice

Correction 16/05/2023: Please note that the median salary Mansfield College pays for college cleaning staff is £22,672 (£10.90 ph) and the lowest hourly salary is £10.90.

Netflix and Scroll: Sound Familiar?

Sahar Malaika
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Netflix and Scroll: Sound Familiar?

All findings are taken from the 31 responses to a survey that was released early Hilary Vac 2023.

Before I begin on my journey, exploring the depths of Oxford’s culture of procrastination, I would like to make a confession. This vac, I was supposed to write 2 essays, rewrite 2 collection essays, watch 10 Shakespeare plays and read the Prelude by Wordsworth (a total of 13 books). I spent this vac rewatching Friends for the 3rd time, finishing another fantasy book trilogy, sending self-tape auditions, keeping up with #escapril, baking and writing this article. I say this so that you know, when it comes to procrastination, I am highly experienced and I am, by no means, speaking as an outsider looking in. Because of this chronic issue, I thought that it would be appropriate for the beginning of Trinity Term, to reach out to fellow procrastinators and ask them about their experiences and also to share any advice that they might have that could help us.

The main point, however, is to say to all those who procrastinate, you are not alone. When given the options of 0-1, 2-3, 4-5 and 5-10 hours of procrastination, just over half of the responses to the survey claimed that they procrastinate 2-3 hours a day (56.7%) with no reports of people procrastinating between 0-1 hours. We all have a tendency to procrastinate.

This might not sound like a huge chunk of the day, but this is disregarding the hours of lectures, social commitments and classes we might have. 2-3 hours can feel like a lot with the endless string of things we have to commit to. So what do we do to span the time between being given the assignment and rushing to hand it in? The scene of the crime for most people who responded to the form is the bedroom:

This makes sense, because – despite the desks that most colleges so kindly provide for us – the pictures on the pinboards just look so cute and make us think of that time we spent in France and “oh! Where were the pictures for that again?” or “I wander how much a trip to Spain would cost” or “I should really reply to those messages” (unrelated to the train of thought but a present thought nonetheless”). Social media is also the leading contender as a method of procrastination with 20 out of the 31 responses saying that they use social media to procrastinate – especially scrolling. And your bed does just look so comfy and a perfect place to pursue all of these various trains of thought. Bonus: you’re nice and warm and not stressed! 

A few more fun ways of procrastination included cleaning, baking, and even making playlists. Methods of procrastination even vary if you’re just one person:

“Cleaning/tidying, chatting, doing other things I need to do instead of work, making playlists, lying in bed staring at the ceiling, crying”

Honestly, we are so creative in the ways we choose to procrastinate that “doing other things instead of doing work” really sums it up perfectly. Procrastination is such a beautifully diverse activity that can range in time taken and activities chosen so that we can spend as much time NOT doing work as possible. 

Despite this, 90% of responses also reported that they would say that their procrastination is an issue. So why do we procrastinate?

Simultaneously, 100% of the responses agreed that Oxford burns them out, which is where we can see a common denominator. Something that we can all agree on when we’re talking about the City of Dreaming Spires is that it is, whilst beautiful, VERY hard work. Ironically, being in an environment that’s so academically intensive, procrastination can make us feel so inadequate and we begin to lose faith in our academic ability.  

One response that echoed many others, encompassing the experience of how Oxford might fuel our procrastination was that they often procrastinate when “in situations of immense stress”. Although having some level of pressure might give a well-needed push in the right direction, the stress of our lifestyles is perpetual which means that even if you know that there is a deadline, this makes procrastination worse.

Another said that they are more likely to procrastinate “when I have a piece of work I’m not enjoying”. However, in this TED-Ed Video, they answer the question “Why you procrastinate even though it feels bad?”, they take a more psychological approach to answer why we subject ourselves to the endless cycle that is procrastination? The answer is that it’s because, for a lot of people, we care a lot about the task at hand which means we stress ourselves out and do our best to avoid it (because not trying means not failing) until it’s too late to do our best. This is more echoed by the response that they most procrastinate in situations “When I really care about the work and it’s important to me.”

This intensity causes a frustrating cycle of putting something off, and then being so behind on work that there’s no point in starting it at night when the day is finished so you might as well try in the morning but then it’s 3am and you’re sitting in your room, a 24 hour college library or a creepy computer room trying to finish the essay in time for your 9am tutorial which you know you’re going to be too exhausted to interact with anyway. A few responses also said that they often leave things too late and end up rushing things like essays, which, in turn, leads you to feel inadequate and not completing your best academic work. One person described how procrastination “ends up making my work so much more stressful than it has to be”. 

It also means that the standard of the work you submit goes down:

“I end up rushing work and submitting subpar essays, sometimes past the deadline”

There’s is something deeper in this observation, especially when we talk about Oxford students, who are often already perfectionists before we get here. There is something really terrifying about the aspect of trying your best in a piece of work and being told that it’s still not good enough. Maybe in an essay subject, you spend days researching and working on answering a question, only for your tutor to turn around and say they don’t like it. That possibility is always looming and that’s so disheartening. 

Procrastination means that you don’t give yourself enough time to finish the piece of work, you always have the excuse that you didn’t have sufficient time to do it and there’s no risk that your best work might not actually be good enough. The heavy workload that we are given in the first place lends itself to this cause because we become students that become used to churning out pieces of work that are not actually perfect and will probably not be your best work.

“In this case, it’s important to remember that you’re not procrastinating because you’re lazy, it’s a freeze/flight response from when you’re being put in a situation of intense stress.”

This was one of the best pieces of advice that was given by one of the respondees. This is especially important when we’re considering the role of perfection and the pressure to achieve it causing our procrastination getting worse. My own advice to you would be that this idea of academic perfection is completely artificial. There is always someone that’s going to be better than you at each thing that you strive to do but that’s okay and it doesn’t make your contributions to your subject/society/field any less important.

Some people also highlighted how your procrastination can be used as something helpful:  

“In these cases [when work is boring], use procrastination as a signifier for what you’re not enjoying but also what you probably need to concentrate more when trying to focus.”

In a university when we’re trained to research all topics of our field in depth, it’s helpful to look at procrastination in this way, especially for those of us who are given option papers, so that we can see, through our procrastination, the routes that we really don’t want to be pursuing.

Thankfully for me and, I hope, some of you, the respondees also offered a lot of practical advice. Whilst the bedroom draws you in with the comfort of a warm bed, for many people who responded to the form, going to the library is a popular way for place for them to go to stop procrastinating, or even planning study groups with friends. I can attest to the fact that being around other people who seem to be working so vigorously keeps me accountable for persevering in the work that I need to be doing and stops me from going onto Instagram on my laptop. This person highlighted how to keep yourself accountable in more ways than this:

“Commit to being in a public space where other people can see me, make lists detailing out my tasks, timetable in times to work and also to relax and see other people”

Surrounding yourself with people and making plans with them to study can give a bit of structure to your time and can also help to make sure you commit to leaving time to study because another person is involved. 

If you’re a bit more of an introvert and find it better to be on your own then some others advised the Pomodoro technique or “turn [your] phone off and focus on doing a small task to start! Once I have some momentum going then I might also be able to do the bigger tasks.”

A few of the responses also included people who had ADHD and they also had advice for others: “Try to plan things, remember to take my ADHD meds, use other people to hold me accountable” 

One way of using others to keep yourself accountable, especially if you have ADHD is “Body doubling (have someone around me so it motivates me to study).” Body-doubling is a self-help technique, popularly advertised for those who have ADHD, where someone anchor’s you to your task (by conducting it with you) to ensure you don’t get distracted.

One thing that I would advise against is to “motivate [yourself] through fear and panic”. This is especially important when we can see how a lot of people’s procrastination stems from their fear of imperfection. Using that same fear to push yourself is only going to perpetuate the cycle that we are working so hard to avoid. If you take anything away from this, please remember that you need to give yourself a break and not work yourself into burnout.

“Your brain needs a break, and even though some procrastination like scrolling is probably unhealthy for you, it’s also useful to not be constantly analyzing things or committing to projects (as you do in your degree). Just because you aren’t doing work doesn’t mean your time is wasted or you’re not being productive”

In many ways, procrastination is our brain’s way of saying that we’re overdoing it and that we need to give ourselves a break. This is your reminder to keep telling yourself:

“You’re not lazy and you’re not alone!! You work hard regardless.”

Even “treat yourself after [the work is] done” because you’ll be rewarding yourself for ensuring that you’ve worked hard and it will become something that is a bit less stressful.

Procrastination, whilst the bane of the Oxford education system, is actually something that we can use to our advantage. So, to all of my classmates, friends, and fellow procrastinators, please, take a moment to procrastinate this evening, crochet, bake cookies, reorganise your pin board and…

“Remember why you’re here and doing what you’re doing. Don’t let anything snowball and if you need to be in a moment of procrastination or a moment away from everything allow yourself to! Learn how you best get back on track and don’t keep it or any other pressures to yourself ❤️”

Russian ambassador says Ukrainian students “may return to their country”

Rufus Hall
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Russian ambassador says Ukrainian students “may return to their country”

Speaking at the Oxford Russian Club, the Russian Ambassador to the UK, Andrey Kelin, downplayed the brutality of Russian military action in Ukraine and said that refugees in Oxford who have fled the violence may return home if they want to, but would likely be conscripted into the Ukrainian forces.

Kelin, who is banned from entering Parliament’s Westminster estate, suggested that it is the responsibility of the West to stop supplying the Ukrainian armed forces with weapons before peace can come to Ukraine and refugees can permanently return to their home country. 

“We are not responsible”, Kelin said. “We are trying to diminish the size of the Ukrainian war machine […] either they can continue casualties, or they can stop immediately.” The ambassador continually presented the origins of the conflict in Ukraine as relating to the emergence of “militant [Ukrainian] nationalism” and the suppression of the Russian language. 

When asked about possible resolutions to the conflict, Kelin said that the last time there had been “sensible” negotiations between the two countries was in April 2022, as the team sent by Ukraine had been “prepared for a compromise, especially in security”. But, he claimed, these negotiations had stopped suddenly on the back of US pressure and after the Bucha massacre, which he suggested might have been “artificially staged”. 

As documented by the UN Human Rights Monitoring Mission, 458 bodies, at least 19 of which were children, were recovered from Bucha in April 2022. The massacre came as part of the Russian effort to occupy the town which lies just outside Kyiv, and involved the summary execution of at least 73 civilians. 

Kelin has also been criticised for previously denying that Russia bombed a theatre in Mariupol housing civilians. The Associated Press reported that 600 people died as a result of the strikes on the theatre. A maternity ward, containing children, was also the subject of air strikes in Mariupol. The governor of the Donetsk Oblast said that 17 people were injured in the bombing, including women in labour.

In response to questions concerning the future of Russia’s geopolitical status within Europe, Kelin said that “Russia is a European country”. While “temporarily [Russia] will have to rely on China”, he seemed sure that “sooner or later we will have to reconcile our differences”, although Russia “will not take the initiative” on this. Such a reconciliation would rely on “another European architecture” which would consider “the interests of all on the continent, not just NATO and European Union members”.

The Russian Club event was met with protest from demonstrators who congregated outside the venue, many of whom were draped in the Ukrainian flag. Several held signs and banners, one of which read “Kelin represents murderers”. One protester, Anna Hope, denounced “giving a platform” to Kelin and the Russian government. She also spoke about raising the visibility of the war in Ukraine for those who are not personally connected to it, worrying that “people have learned to tune out news about Ukraine”. 

During the talk, the ambassador continually brushed over the total 9000 civilian deaths that have occurred since the Russian invasion of Ukraine, parrying the suggestion that civilians are being targeted in Ukraine with a reference to NATO bombing in Serbia in 1999. Furthermore, Kelin claimed that Russia was “now rebuilding parts of Ukraine that have been destroyed”, and would “rebuild all areas that stay attached to Russia”.

The event took place in the back living room of a house in North Oxford after two previous venues, a college and a church, cancelled. Kelin was accompanied by his own security detail and there was a police presence outside of the house. A member of the Oxford Russian Club told Cherwell that they thought forums like this with open discussion are very important and expressed frustration that the university community was not more supportive.

The University’s Graduate Scholarship Scheme for Ukrainian Refugees matriculated 26 postgraduate Ukrainian students in October 2022 and plans to fund 18 further scholarships in the next academic year. Oxford city has also welcomed hundreds of refugees since the Russian invasion on 24th February 2022. 

Image Credit: Katy Okuneva for FAR Oxford

The Perfect Tory? Rishi Sunak’s tutors reveal his student persona

Olivia Boyle
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The Perfect Tory? Rishi Sunak’s tutors reveal his student persona

Breaking news: Sunak hasn’t changed much. It’s the late nineties, Lincoln College is awaiting the arrival of an earnest, economically and socially conservative PPEist. Enter Rishi Sunak. Rumour has it that Sunak started his Lincoln years as a perfect Tory, and has remained that way. As is seen in his giddy Commons speeches, addressing striking workers and refugee policy is all still a bit of an academic exercise to Sunak. 

I contacted two of Sunak’s tutors from his time as an undergraduate studying PPE at Lincoln College (1998-2001). With the aim of understanding his head-school-boy parliamentarian manner, my plans were scuppered when both tutors pleaded the fifth under the laws of respectful “privacy” and “confidentiality”. 

Michael Rosen, now professor at Harvard’s Department of Government and then Senior Tutor, even offered an analysis of why Brits have been so hooked on knowing what politicians used to be like. Consolation? Hardly. Rosen stated “I think it’s unfortunate the way that people in Britain look back on what someone was like at University — even, indeed, at school — as if that defined who they are many years later.” 

Yet, surely, to get to the crux of contemporary politics, there is nothing more valuable than peering into the nascent Conservative mind. 

The unintelligible and cataclysmic mini-budget of Kwasi Kwarteng and Liz Truss at the end of last year was explained by their university beginnings. As Ian Hislop told Politics Joe, Truss and Kwarteng were having the same fun and games that they had been having in their Oxford JCRs. 

Tracing the student history of our leaders is precisely what must be done to understand just how politicians masterminded their politics. 

Rosen’s words suggested that, “in twenty years time”, I – and the other young people still left reeling from the question of just how the Conservative government has been through three Prime Ministers in under six months and still believes it’s fit to represent the voice of a people – will appreciate his hope that we cut politicians some slack. But, in twenty years, Sunak’s tenure may well have secured the slow and painful death of the NHS, the welfare state, and the state educational system. Entirely privately educated and now sitting on a staggering £730m (including the estate of his wife, Akshata Murty), it seems that his student years were the ones that nipped any chance of equitable, empathetic policy-making in the bud.

Sunak studied PPE but dropped Philosophy after his first year (perhaps unsurprisingly, say what you will). Professor Max de Gaynesford oversaw some of his first-year learning – Logic and Descartes, as de Gaynesford told Cherwell. No one could deny that Sunak is a man of logic though humane thoughtfulness does not seem to be a strongpoint – take Braverman’s secure position in Cabinet despite a history of ludicrous policy-making. 

De Gaynesford made it clear, however, that Sunak worked hard: “his seriousness, intelligence and hard work were reflected in his First” and he “belonged to a particularly committed PPE cohort who were a joy to teach – there were I think seven Lincoln Firsts in PPE in his year.” On paper, Sunak had his target and reached it. Whether this was an ethically and morally sound target is a fact lost to time. Though, efficiency and targeted action is exactly what it takes to become an oligarch, as George Monbiot described the Premier in conversation with Politics Joe. Plato would agree: oligarchy is the perfect answer for the money-hungry. Not that Sunak would know.

One of Sunak’s targets realised at Oxford was reportedly Number 10 itself. Michael Rosen told Tatler, when Sunak became Chancellor of the Exchequer in 2020, that “fellow students said he wanted to become Conservative prime minister. But I don’t think anyone took that too seriously.” 

In the same piece for Tatler, it is recorded that “his luck has given him the politics of the head boy”. In Office, at Oxford, in the Oxford University Investment Society and at Lincoln College, Sunak followed through on this reputation. Sunak was a mouse at Oxford: his presence was largely unnoticeable, but a few crumbs appeared when he left. During his time here Sunak made his way up the ranks of the Oxford University Investment Society (OUIS). Term cards show he was Treasurer in Michaelmas 1999 and became President of the Society at some point in the following two terms, but there is no evidence of him from Michaelmas 2000 onwards. The OUIS leaflets have an abundance of advertisement from Goldman Sachs, so it wouldn’t be surprising if he secured his placement there and promptly left the society. 

A stickler for the rules irrespective of general good-doing. It was said, probably as a result of this, that “outside of Lincoln College Sunak had no reputation…he was a nobody, much like Blair.” Indeed, following a dusty afternoon of Cherwell-archive-raiding, I felt I had uncovered nothing on Sunak. Other than that he was a “grayman”, a non-entity at Oxford, as the Union librarian told Cherwell. 

Again, Goldman Sachs advertisements filled the Rishi Sunak-shaped void in the Cherwell archives. Sunak left Oxford with a position with the bank in 2001. He didn’t leave the University with quite the same tarnishes as the other chums of Johnsonian Oxford, just a steady, bureaucratic job. He fulfilled the prophecy that his peers had for him as told to Tatler: Sunak’s a “nerdy teetotaller who was just very clearly going into business.” Rishi Sunak’s time at Oxford nourished the fledgling Conservative’s thoroughness, money-focus and, well, dullness. And following his eventful Oxonian predecessors, it appears this was and still is perfect Tory material.

A Beginner’s Guide to Being Single

Anonymous
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A Beginner’s Guide to Being Single

When my relationship ended over a year ago, I was so good at the breakup. I did everything right. I cried (a lot). I thought about texting him (but didn’t). I watched some awful rom-coms (young Matthew McConaughey, anyone?). I did face masks with my friends and ate ice cream, and for a long time, I really thought my heart would never recover. Of course, as it turns out, this is just how everyone feels after a breakup: I wasn’t the first person to feel like that, and I won’t be the last.

Time passed. I dedicated my newfound time to my friendships, my hobbies (all cards on the table: I row), and my degree. I now look back on what could have been one of my worst times as one filled with memories made with my greatest friends. The novelty of singleness led to a hot(-tish) girl summer (although falling short of the Lily-James-as-young-Donna vac of my dreams). I went on dates. I met new people. But as quickly as it came, the novelty wore off and the reality set in: the dating scene at Oxford is awful. 

It didn’t help that I have no idea how to date. My last relationship all but happened to me during sixth form when a guy I got on with like a house on fire and eventually fell in love with came along to begin our on-and-sometimes-off relationship. Sure – there are worse problems to have, but I’m convinced that I’m not the whole problem here. I’m not too proud to tell you I’ve tried dating apps, and they’re a waste of time at best. And yet, meeting someone in person seems like a romantic notion now confined to late-noughties rom-coms. Most people who have tried dating here have had similar experiences. Like them, in the process of exploring the dating scene Oxford has to offer, I have become disillusioned with the great parts about being single; I became one of those people who is far too often talking about how they miss being in a relationship. But I’m a better feminist than that – I’m sure of it. 

If you’re wondering why this has been on my mind so much recently, it comes back to a conversation I had at a formal a while ago with the boyfriend of a close friend of mine. 

“I was really intimidated by you when I first met you, you know.” He told me. 

This surprised me. I didn’t think I was intimidating.

He continued enthusiastically. “Yeah! You’re really intimidating! Like, you seem to have your shit together, and you call me out if I do something wrong – you can be a bit scary sometimes.” He then proceeded to ask all of our guy friends who sat around the table, who confirmed that I was actually very intimidating before they knew me, and that I would therefore never ever date again.

The feminist part of me was going, maybe you should be intimidating. After all, aren’t all the things he listed good things? But a not insignificant part of me – the part which was told I was ‘bossy’ instead of ‘confident’ growing up – felt overwhelmingly frustrated that I couldn’t just be a bit together and self-assured and not intimidate guys I know with it.

So this is the real issue: I might miss some parts of being in a relationship, but I do not want to change myself, to become less good at what I’m doing, to enjoy the things I like less, to take up less space, just to date again. I do not want to lower my standards either, or to expect less of any romantic interests. But from what I can tell, if a relationship was really what I wanted, then I would have to settle or change some of these things. And given that I have no intention of doing that (nor, I think, do I want a relationship that badly), I’m going to remind myself of all of the reasons that I am lucky to not be in a relationship at this point in my life. And there is so much to love – it’s just about finding it. I can’t be the only one who’s not great at being single yet. But I’ll get there.

Oxford University awarded University of Sanctuary status

Olivia Boyle
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Oxford University awarded University of Sanctuary status

The University of Oxford has received an award from the Universities of Sanctuary for its continued commitment to helping those who have been forcibly displaced around the world. 

Oxford is one of 25 universities across the country to have been awarded University of Sanctuary status. They make up a network of higher education institutions supporting people seeking sanctuary.

The University of Oxford follows Mansfield and Somerville Colleges which were awarded College of Sanctuary status in 2021 after establishing fully funded Sanctuary Scholarships for postgraduate students. 

Oxford has been recognised for its Refugee Studies Centre (founded in 1982) and Refugee-Led Research Hub (launched in 2021). More recently, the University’s Ukraine Scholarship scheme has added to its history of offering scholarships to refugees. 

The University has been able to offer scholarships to refugees and other forced migrants since 2016. It began the Refugee Academic Futures scheme this academic year to provide scholarships for graduates. 

The University of Sanctuary award heralds renewed investment in helping refugees. Under its new Oxford Sanctuary Committee, Oxford will now deliver an integrated programme of scholarships, support for students from displacement backgrounds and for the Oxford branch of Student Action for Refugees.

University of Sanctuary Coordinator, Maryam Taher said “we look forward to the University building on its positive work, and developing even closer links with local refugee communities and support groups.”

She continued, “the support of the University in welcoming those seeking sanctuary is vital to ensuring the UK offers a safe and supportive environment for those in need at times of crisis.”

Committed to inclusivity, the Oxford Sanctuary Community orchestrated the city of Oxford’s first Sanctuary Fair to connect refugees, students and locals held at the Town Hall on 11 May.

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