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The Ashes: England must make changes

Welcome to Cherwell’s summer cricket coverage! After the engrossing vulgarity of the World T20 tournament, the real business of summer, the Ashes is upon us. I’ll be posting my thoughts on what’s going on periodically over the series, and you are all welcome to agree, castigate, and anything else in
the comments section below.

 

I, like most people, was absolutely thrilled with the result of the First test, although it wasn’t a case of “I’d have taken that at the start.” How to be less toothless when we bowl? First, as I think everyone says, drop Panesar. He is worse than Swann at everything right now, despite his comedy antics. Harmison needs to be brought back pronto. A harder decision is whether to keep Broad

or put in Onions. Of course, if Flintoff doesn’t recover, Broad will have to play, as a quasi-all-rounder, but also because nobody trusts Bresnan against Hughes or Ponting, or Clarke or North. I’d pick Onions. As much as I love Broad for his apparently Sobers-esque batting, and his uncanny resemblance to Robert Chase on the TV show House, he needs to learn to take wickets regularly. Not to guarantee that Onions will be a wicket machine, but he does what he does better than Broad does. Harmsion and hopefully Flintoff can provide raw pace, and Anderson swing. I’d rather have Onions than Broad as the decidedly fourth seamer.

I sympathise a little with Pieterson for that dodgy shot in the first innings. Yes the sweep gets him runs, and the amount of times I’ve got out insisting I can cover drive a leg stump half-volley makes us brothers of a sort. But it’s not like he doesn’t have the reactions or talent to pull out of an obviously wrong shot. Eoin Morgan can do it, and even players as limited as Nick Knight have pulled off that trick. Otherwise, Haurtiz will just bowl really wide of off stump with a short fine leg, a fine leg, a deep backward point for the reverse sweep, and a deep cover for the inside out, and choke the life out of Pieterson.

What of the Aussies? I don’t think there’s any reason to change the side. This was my first time watching Phil Hughes properly. Even if he only got 36, the sight of him cutting the ball like the love child of Lara and Jayasuriya is seared onto my memory. I’ve never seen anyone in test cricket cut the ball like that. It was pretty terrifying, and I don’t care if the Press think he’s weak against the short ball. He’s only twenty. One day, he’ll learn to hook and pull properly, and then he’s going to get thousands of runs. Tuck him up while you can with straight seamers. Its Ashes 2010-2011 where he’ll eat us alive. Brett Lee isn’t fit, and I was impressed by Australia’s unfancied duo of Siddle and Hilfenhaus. Siddle is a keen man, in the mould of Merv hughes, and Hilfenhaus is one of the most English of Australian bowlers. Hauritz bowled ballsily, and even if he’ll struggle on other pitches, I’m happy for him that he showed himself he could operate at the top level. Johnson bowled poorly, but laugh quietly. When he’s on, he can do as much damage to us as Hughes, Clarke, and Ponting. And that, friends, is a lot.

 

Frayn named the next Professor of Theatre

Acclaimed playwright and novelist Michael Frayn has been named the next Cameron Mackintosh Visiting Professor of Contemporary Theatre. Frayn will succeed Kevin Spacey, the noted actor and director, in October.

The playwright has won numerous awards for his prose works and his theatre credits include Donkey’s Years, Copenhagen and Stage Directions, a collection of theatrical writings. Frayn says he “hopes to find something to say about the nature and practice of theatre that has not already been said.”

The Chair of Contemporary Theatre is intended to promote the study and practice of modern theatrical works and methods. It has previously been occupied by figures such as Stephen Sondheim, Alan Ayckbourn, and Patrick Stewart.

Michael Frayn’s inaugural lecture will take place on the 26 October at St. Catherine’s College.

 

Oxford academics honoured by the Royal Society

Four Oxford academics have won recognition from the Royal Society for the excellence of their work.

Professor Sir John Ball was awarded the Sylvester medal for the encouragement of mathematical research. Professor Marcus du Sautoy was “honoured” to receive an award for communicating science to the UK audiences. Previous winners of the award include David Attenborough and Richard Dawkins.

Professor Sunetra Gupta received this year’s Rosalind Franklin award for her her suitability as a role model and her work on pathogen diversity, The award is funded by the government as part of its efforts to promote women in science, technology, engineering and maths.

The Royal Society also chose an Oxford professor to give this year’s Ferrier lecture. Colin Blakemore, Professor of Neuroscience commented, “It will be a particular privilege to give the Lecture as part of the celebrations for the Royal Society’s 350th anniversary.” The Ferrier lecture is a Royal Society talk given every three years on a subject related to the advancement of natural knowledge on the structure and functions of the nervous system.

12 other awards were given this year.

 

Review: Romeo and Juliet

The scene is set for a perfect summer romance: a warm evening breeze whispers through the trees in Wadham Gardens causing the branches to sway dreamily, the audience gaze at the softly lit grassy stage in quiet anticipation. It is peaceful. Suddenly the sound of cries and laughter peal through the air as the cast of Shakespeare’s greatest love story cavort on to the stage from all sides.

Their costumes are so loud I wonder if I will be able to hear them speak their lines; some enter on foot, whilst others glide in on bicycles! And they are carrying instruments… When the cast begin their first musical number, ‘Rip It Up’, I see various male members of the audience visibly flinch. Even I start to feel slightly perplexed by the unexpected musical rendition. If I had read details of the performance on the Oxford Shakespeare Company website I would have known that the show was being advertised as a ‘rock and roll love story’ and that this version of the play was set in 1950’s Oxford. The old ‘twist on a classic’ chestnut is frequently attempted but is more often than not unsuccessful. I was interested to find out how this production would fare.

The cast consists of just eight actors, many of who double up roles throughout the performance, making lightening quick costume and character changes. To their credit, I did not realise until half way through the play that such extensive doubling up was occurring as it was so seamlessly done. The most successful character chameleon was the versatile Chris Jordan who slipped from playing the camp rascal Mercutio to the militaristic Paris with ‘blink and you’d miss it’ ease. Katie Krane was also noteworthy as Juliet’s nurse, delivering the play’s comic lines with great gusto in a production where every opportunity for humour is seized upon.

Even various tragic moments are given comic touches, such as in the scene in which Friar Lawrence tells Romeo (Alex Tomkins) of his banishment from Verona. Tomkins played this scene like a spoilt, lovesick brat and as the friar berates him for his ‘womanish tears’ we are reminded once again that Romeo is a teenage boy as well as a tragic hero.

If someone had told me beforehand that the play was going to be interspersed with 50’s style music and dance I would have expected it to be a bit naff. But it wasn’t. If it had been done badly or attempted in a half hearted way it could have been terrible. But it wasn’t. Once I had gotten over the shock that I was watching Romeo and Juliet with interludes of 50’s song and dance I really started to enjoy the play. The acting and musical performances from the entire cast were top quality. Overall the music enhanced the effect of Shakespeare’s language rather than detracting from it: the songs were mainly used to give the party scenes new life and to cement Romeo’s status as self-indulgent crooner.

The only wildly inappropriate musical number comes at the close of the performance when the lovers have put an end to their troubles and their parents are gathered around their lifeless bodies. Anything moving about this final scene is obliterated when the corpses jump up and start singing Eddie Cochran’s ‘Three Steps to Heaven.’ It was so horribly camp that it made me wonder whether the whole production had been intended to be slightly tongue in cheek. Overlooking this minor blemish, Guy Retallack’s adaptation of Romeo and Juliet carries off the 50’s twist with great success and, complemented by the dreamy natural scenery of Wadham Gardens, is the ideal end to a balmy summer’s day.

4 stars out of 5

‘Romeo and Juliet’ runs until 22nd August in Wadham College’s Walled Gardens, with student tickets priced at £15.

 

Our Man Abroad: Jordan

It was in a half an hour revision break a few weeks ago that I finally decided to fly out to the Middle East to meet up with a friend, currently studying Arabic, and spend a month making our way through Jordan, Syria, Lebanon and Turkey.

I was allowed all of half an hour to sample the limited delights of the capital, Amman, before we were on a distinctly sweaty bus heading for Wadi Musa, the base from which one can explore the ancient city of Petra, probably best known for its inclusion in the finale to the third Indiana Jones trilogy.

Two years ago a chap, apparently from a town in Iraq that is a hotbed for Al-Quaeda, shot up a tourist attraction in Amman, resulting in the death of a Briton and a plummet in the popularity of Jordan for a certain type of tourist. Unfortunately, that type of tourist, besocked and besandalled, seem to be back. However they did not seem so keen on trekking up to the more hard to reach sights, so we found ourselves at some points wandering alone past enormous facades that opened into to caves carved out of the rock faces. The scale of some of these rock carvings need to be seen to be believed and it is understandable why the Bedouin strived for so long to keep it secret.

Whilst it may be spectacular for the sweaty white man, there is in fact a deeper impact of tourism in Petra. The caves used to be inhabited by Bedouin, some of whom had lived there for countless generations. Yet they have been forced to vacate their caves and, whilst some have moved into the lucrative tourism industry, it is a world away from their former existence. No more is this apparent than in the awe inspiring Wadi Rum, home to TE Lawrence during the Arab Revolt. The Bedouin camps are now just places for tourist to base themselves (us included) and to pay a premium for an “authentic” experience.

The increasing influence of the west in Jordanian life can give rise to some rather bizarre scenarios, whether it be a Bedouin inviting us to play “Need for Speed: UNDERGROUND” on his playstation or having shisha with a seemingly cool youth whose ringtone is a latest hit from Miley Cyrus. Yet Jordan still holds on to its most attractive character trait, that being the friendliness of the Jordanian people, whose enthusiasm to help seems limitless, even when they are not selling anything (or, for my female companions, offering marriage proposals).

Jordan is an island of calm in an otherwise turbulent area- whilst one may frolic in the dead sea before topping up the tan (next to the bizarre sight of women in burkah swimsuits), the view on the other side of the water is not so pretty. Jordan borders both Israel and the West Bank, and it is estimated that a third of Jordan’s six million inhabitants are Palestinian refugees. Add to that the refugees of the current conflict in Iraq (which some estimates put upwards of 700,000), and it is clear how important Jordan is as a safe haven within the Middle East. Our taxi driver in Jerash was a Palestinian refugee who left in 1967 and has never been back. Moving to Jordan has allowed him to earn a living and he even has even managed to send his son to study in the UK on a scholarship. Not all refugees are so lucky. Whilst the largest refugee camp, north of Amman, is made of bricks and concrete, we are told by our driver that some are little more that tents of tarpaulin, and have been so since he first came to Jordan.

Whilst the surrounding countries may look at Jordan with suspicion for its relationship with the UK and its dialogue with Israel, the provisions that she has made for her arab neighbours, with little international help, cannot be underestimated. Both as a tourist destination and as a political study, Jordan is fascinating,and it is with the hope of imminent return that we head north into Syria for the next leg of our journey.

 

A Hitchhikers Guide to a Free Ride

Summer is here and having been cooped up in libraries and lecture theatres for the last eight months many of us see the long vacation as a chance to indulge our wander lust and seek out countries new. But getting out of the bubble is not always easy; for students the rising cost of train, bus and plane tickets can seem extortionate. For the eco-conscious student traveller, it’s also difficult to ignore the fact that these gas guzzling modes of transport are incredibly damaging to the environment. Even if you’ve got cash and no conscience, the journey itself is often uncomfortable, smelly and boring. You can wind up being broke, guilty and disaffected, all before you have even reached your final destination. But there is another option: thumbing a lift, catching a ride, taking a free trip…

There are several things that spring into my mind when I think of hitchhiking. On the one hand there is the hazy, idyllic image of Simon and Garfunkel laughing by the roadside on their way to look for America; the happy, expectant faces of those trying to catch a lift from one end of the country to another clutching their destination boards at the side of the motorway. On the other hand I can’t shake the association of Simon Armitage’s poem ‘Hitcher’ in which the psychotic narrator describes how he picks up a free spirited wanderer, beats him to death and then watches his unfortunate victim bounce off the curb as he speeds away, telling him that he can ‘walk from there.’

Aside from poetry and dodgy B movies, there are some very real and terrifying examples that show how hitchhiking can turn into a nightmare.During the 1990’s Australian Ivan Milat murdered at least seven hitchers (five of whom were backpackers visiting the country) in unprovoked attacks which shocked the nation. We know these types of cases are rare, but when they’re catapulted into the media spotlight, they’re certainly unnerving. 

If you want a clearer picture of the reality of hitchhiking, it’s always worthwhile talking to some people who actually do it. Sian, 20, studying at the University of Sheffield is a great advocate of thumbing a ride. “Hitchhiking,” she claims, “if done safely, is an incredible experience. You meet so many different kinds of people; it really restores your faith in humanity.” Andy, 20, at the University of Bradford agrees, saying that the hitching “makes the journey as important as the destination; it makes it into an adventure.” Andy first started hitching short distances whilst in Ireland on holiday with friends, more recently however, he has hitched to France and Italy. He found the idea of encountering all kinds of different people from all walks of life to be an exciting prospect rather than a scary one. As Andy points out, because “you don’t necessarily end up in a car with people who share your world view” the interactions hitchers have with those offering lifts can be very intense. You are walking into a complete stranger’s life and walking out again hours later having left your mark. 

None of the individuals I spoke to had encountered any serious dangers whilst travelling, probably because they had all planned their trips carefully and adhered to some basic safety rules. Kirsty, 21, from London advises first time hitchers to observe the make and registration of the vehicle before getting into it, and “try to sit in the passenger seat if you can” she recommends. Andy continues, “get a good spot to stand where you can be seen, hitch with friends rather than alone and if you don’t feel safe getting into a car then don’t! You tend to get a sense of the people who stop.”

Despite the many positive reactions to hitchhiking, there are some definite downsides. Hitchhiking may save money but it doesn’t necessarily save time: whilst we may be frequently subjected to delays in airports and at train stations, the perfect ride is even less likely to turn up just when you need it. Kirsty agrees that her preferred method of transport can be quite time consuming. She spent her Christmas vacation hitching to Germany and back but ended up being stranded there; eventually arriving home almost a week after her university term had started. Andy concedes that there are downsides to hitchhiking but sticks firmly to the philosophy that “you have to take the rough with the smooth.” Recently whilst hitching Andy found himself in the freezing cold for hours trying to get a lift out of Verona, Italy.  He finally managed to hitch a ride at 3am from a man who had driven past him earlier but decided to turn back and pick him up out of the kindness of his heart. Clearly this sort of experience is touching and it is easy to see why, with cases such as this, hitching can be truly said to reaffirm your faith in people.

Whilst it seems that most people hitching lifts do not encounter any serious dangers, it is definitely not a risk free mode of transport. It certainly shouldn’t be attempted by anyone who has not planned their trip very carefully, and preferably should have discussed it with someone who has experience of this way of getting from A to B. That said, it is environmentally friendly, cheap and can transform a journey. If, at the end of the road, you find that it is difficult to decide whether to give hitchhiking a thumbs up or a thumbs down perhaps it is worth trying it for yourself: in the words of Armitage’s free spirited hitcher ‘the truth… is blowin’ in the wind.’

 

 

Oxford banker falls to death

A 24-year-old City banker and Oxford graduate fell to his death last week as he jumped from the rooftop of a restaurant in London.

Last Sunday, Anjool ‘Jools’ Malde climbed over the railing of the rooftop of the restaurant Coq d’Argent and fell down 80 feet to his death. He was wearing a Hugo Boss suit and held a glass of champagne. The police are not treating his death as suspicious.

Malde, who read Geography at St. Peter’s College, led a vibrant life at Oxford. He was Cherwell’s Business Manager and an Online News Editor. He regularly contributed news stories to both The Oxford Student and Cherwell, during and after his time at the University.

Jools was also on the Standing Committee of the Oxford Union, was involved with the Oxford Entrepreneurs society and worked as a radio presenter for BBC Oxford, for which he interviewed Geri Halliwell. He also moderated the Oxford Gossip website during his time as an undergraduate.

Beyond Oxford, Jools moved into the financial and entrepreneurial world. He worked as a stockbroker for Deutsche Bank, and co-founded AlphaParties, a firm organising club nights in London. Due to have celebrated his 25th birthday last week, Jools split his time between his homes in London and Spain, often describing his life as “living the dream.”

His death came as a shock to those who knew him, with friends quietly flooding the internet with their thoughts and prayers for his family.

His old friend Matt Richardson, who set up OxGoss, called Jools “an exceptionally talented young man.”

“He was a true polymath and he’ll be greatly missed; he was genuinely a tremendous part of everybody’s life”, he added.

“He was clearly very ambitious, but very friendly,” confessed a colleague of Malde to The Sunday Times.

“He’s been portrayed as a party animal, but that doesn’t do him justice. He was a man of integrity, a good guy.”

Naina and Bharat Malde, Anjool’s parents, said they were “devastated” by the death.

A joint statement they issued read, “We are absolutely devastated. Equally we are so touched by the warm words from his many, many friends that alluded both to his tremendous talent and positive, lively spirit. He was an inspiration to so many. He meant everything to us.

“Apparently he donned a Hugo Boss suit with matching designer accessories, treated himself to a glass of champagne at the much frequented, upmarket City restaurant Coq d’Argent, and jumped from an eighth-floor rooftop. Style meant everything to him and that’s how he chose his exit.”

The power of a bag

Mary Poppins knew it – a bag really is all you need. The staple of any stylish wardrobe, an amazing bag can lift an outfit from dull to dazzling in one swipe of a student overdraft-enhanced debit card.

Now, before you get all cynical on me, I am only a recent convert to the bag dream. I floated around for years carrying a Gap brown leather tote (‘just because it’s useful and it goes with everything…’), Asian fakes, a cloth ‘gap year bag’ and everything in between. At one point, I even had a black handbag and a brown handbag to go with different outfits, breaking the first law of fashion: don’t match all your accessories unless you are the Queen or Margaret Thatcher.

I was vocally scathing of my two best friends, with their bags that cost more than, well, a lot of things. I came back from my gap year with ‘experiences’; they stayed at home and earned enough to buy a shoulder ornament. But the more I looked at their bags, the more I saw how beautiful and, dare I say it, functional, they were. It was undeniable that they gave any outfit a bit of class, a bit of style. Somehow, even leggings and a baggy hoodie become slightly cool, slightly off-duty celebrity, when combined with big sunglasses and a gorgeous bag.

So, ready for ridicule, I announced my intention to buy a nice bag. Not outrageous money, but still a distinct investment. Luckily I had expert advice on hand to point me in the direction of some names that ‘you’d probably like’. It’s always good to find a designer that suits you and I did my research quite thoroughly. Starting on somewhere like netaporter.com gives you an overview of what’s around, then you can Google the designers you like the look of. There are a lot of bag blogs out there, as well as forums where you can ask questions about your would-be-purchases.

I found my nice bag. It leapt out at me: shape, colour, material, quietly ostentatious and classic. The very fact that I liked it set off warning bells in my mind, so I quickly forwarded the link to my much more tasteful friends, who confirmed the unthinkable. I had fallen in love with the right one! A few weeks on my favourites list, where it sat, waiting to be clicked during essay-related Wikipedia searches and Facebook sessions, and I knew it was to be mine. Not one for making such an important purchase on the Internet, I waited until I was in London to abuse my bank balance and bought The Bag in Harvey Nick’s, after playing with it in front of the mirror for a few minutes. And within a few short days, it became a part of my life.

There is something undeniably lovely about having a bag that goes with everything and improves any outfit. Whilst you might argue it’s a waste of money to spend a lot on something that could cost next to nothing on the high street, if you get the right one, you will probably have made a wise investment in terms of wears to the pound. A good, classic bag will last for years and will not date like a Topshop equivalent, which everyone has anyway. And you will join the quietly superior club of people who just know that what you’re carrying is a little bit special.

So if you have one expensive item in your wardrobe, let it be a good bag. It really will have the power to do anything – except, perhaps, to hold your hat stand.

Royal Academy Summer Exhibition 2009

Summer wouldn’t feel like summer without the The Royal Academy’s Summer Exhibition. For those not in the know, now in its 241st year, the summer exhibition consists of a huge range of works in different media including painting, photography, sculpture and architecture from both established and unknown current artists. It is this which makes the exhibition so remarkable – a priceless silver Damian Hirst sculpture of St Bartholomew might be exhibited next to a watercolour by your aunt Sally who lives in Bognor Regis – it’s all judged by the same panel.

Every room is like a magnified version of an eccentric grandmother’s house with frame upon frame upon frame cluttering the walls. Each work is labelled with a number that corresponds to a printed list of works, giving it the funny feel of a guessing game at which is the most expensive or well known in the room. As always, there is a lot of chaff among the wheat with derivative Degas-esque ballet dancer sculptures, glorified wallpaper designs and soulless commercial photo-realist paintings. However these add to the authentic feel of an art fair in which every budget and taste is accommodated with works ranging from £70 to £700,000.

There are some charming works of more obscure origins such as Tom Phillips’s A Humument: Scribe the story, (no. 121 in the large Weston room), which uses a page of a mysterious-sounding book, The Human Document, as a canvas, linking various words across the page such as ‘changes made … the book…continue’ by leaving them uncovered in natural-seeming forms. The established gems are also well worth seeing, bold architectural paintings by Tony Bevan, some humorously kitsch works by Tracy Emin including a painting of piglet entitled I want it back, that feeling again (no. 579), and some strangely beautiful cartilage-esque architectural models by Zaha Hadid.

Nevertheless, the exhibition’s 1266 works are much too much to see in one afternoon so if you are to see one thing then the room dedicated to video art is definitely worth a visit. It is the first year that such a room has been included and the 19 short works featured range from Art Attack style arial image-making to digital Pictionary. The film gallery, curated by Richard Wilson, projects each clip onto Wilson’s own installation, which he describes as ‘a wall ripped from another interior space’. This other wall, with its torn edges and slanted position has the effect of removing each film from the context of the room, enhancing the sense of dislocation and surrealism that unite this otherwise disparate collection.

Two short films by Matt Calderwood, Gloss and Strips (Vertical), show the methodical dipping of a light bulb into a pot of black paint at increasing degrees until the light is snuffed out and the systematic smashing of a row of white tube lighting until the lights are all broken and we are left in darkness. The meaning isn’t clear but the effect is eerie and cathartic. With Strips (Vertical) the light fills the frame at the start so that we see a white screen and each time a light is smashed we begin to see lines – it is only near the end that we see in three dimensions and realise what has been shown. This defamiliarisation of quotidian objects creates an unexpected beauty that is simple but poignant. It somehow distils life, the passage of time, beginning and end, much as a Beckett’s Breath does.

This contrasts with the highly polished Surprise by Ben Dodd, which depicts a woman surprising a man with a birthday cake and sparklers at which point he is so shocked he falls backwards and smashes the glass shower guard. This sequence is shown in reverse. As the film goes through the event in slow motion accompanied by dramatic classical music, the initial scene of a man lying in broken glass is explained and shown to be unexpectedly trivial. This again upturns convention by depicting a farcical moment as mysterious and scenic. Guy Oliver’s Boythorn, His Thoughts Can Kill is similarly unexpected and darkly hilarious, but I won’t give away the punch line.

The Summer Exhibition 2009 is open until Sunday the 16th August from 10am -6pm daily (last admission 5.30pm) with late night openings until 10pm on Fridays. Admission is £7 full price and £5 NUS.

 

Open-access rocks

You may have noticed a couple of months back that ‘scientists’ (whoever they are) discovered an extraordinary ‘missing link’ fossil, a strut in the bridge between primates like us and the rest of the mammals. Go on, read about it, it’s brilliant—there’s even a surreptitious deal in a vodka bar to inject a bit of spy-thriller intrigue if finding a spectacular piece of our evolutionary jigsaw isn’t enough for you.

However, rather than further add to comprehensive and generally competent coverage of Ida’s lovely bones, (even my favourite newspaper doesn’t humiliate itself too much), I’d like to talk about the journal in which discoverer Jørn Hurum chose to publish his findings.

Dr Hurum released the study in open-access journal PLoS ONE, which means that you can go and read the paper right now, even if you’re not on a university Internet connection. You may be surprised to learn that this isn’t the norm. Most scientific research—which we all pay for through our taxes—cannot be read unless you have a pricey subscription to the journal it’s been published in, which basically means you have to belong to a rich educational institution in a developed country.

You don’t have to be particularly woolly and liberal to experience the knee-jerk response that this is transparently inequitable. Indeed, my initial reaction upon learning about the open-access publishing movement was to be thoroughly captivated by the struggle to throw off the shackles of the scientific oligarchy and make the sum of human knowledge available to all. Why should Nature and Science get to set the agenda for the rest of the scientific world, and profit handsomely from doing so?

It’s also stupid. Science is an immense part of the sum total of human knowledge, and giving greater access to this knowledge allows it to be built upon, rather than forcing scientists to reinvent the wheel because ‘Cylindrical apparatus to facilitate horizontal motion’ is published in some weird journal the library doesn’t have the subscription to at the moment. What about scientists in developing countries, whose libraries can’t afford any subscriptions at all? Moreover, shouldn’t science journalists have access to the papers they’re writing about, and doctors have access to the latest medical research? The open-access movement makes a compelling case.

However, there’s no such thing as a free lunch—if journals don’t make money from subscriptions, you have to pay for journal administration and publication some other way. ‘Open-access’ is therefore a possibly-glamorised term for a change in business model—what it really signals is a change from ‘pay-to-read’, where the revenues roll in from subscriptions, to ‘pay-to-write’, where authors of papers foot the bill instead.

This alteration does come with some attendant disadvantages: what if the authors can’t afford the fees? It would seem to bias publications towards large collaborations: individual researchers in theoretical fields on personal grants which basically cover a computer and some stationery might be left in the shade. It may also hit those same scientists in developing countries we were worrying about, though some journals will waive their fees if you come from a poor nation. (Pay-to-read journals too could waive their charges in developing countries—though they seem not to.)

Pay-to-write journals may also emphasise the already-pervasive phenomenon of ‘publication bias’—where scientists are less willing to publish negative findings due to a perceived lack of impact—by adding a further financial disincentive to writing up your tedious null result. Further, publishers are no longer compelled to publish good works and maximise their profits by compelling institutions to subscribe to their must-have collection, but merely to publish lots, since they’re paid per paper published.

On the beautifully-symmetric contrary, making writers pay might dissuade them from adding to the already-intractable volume of science being produced: scientists might be encouraged to bundle a few, smaller results together into longer, ‘review’-style articles which may be easier to digest.

If you, like me, are already experiencing crippling cognitive dissonance because the ‘right’ answer seems light on pros, we should probably ask the big question: what benefits will universal access to research afford? Sadly, I’m sceptical. If you did try to read Dr Hurum’s paper, you may have found it a bit, er, intractably dry. Scientific articles are often littered with jargon which, if it doesn’t make a paper unintelligible to the non-nerd, certainly makes it boring. Doctors wouldn’t really find access to cutting-edge studies that helpful, because much new research turns out to be wrong, and there’s simply too much of it to read—what medics really need is a flowchart-like prescription of what to prescribe, based on the best meta-analyses available. Science journalism is probably too jaundiced for access to original papers to help much. Even where research is open-access, there’s little evidence that time-pressured, non-specialist journos do much more than re-word press releases, let alone read or link to the original articles. The key unknown quantity, it seems to me, is how many practising academics cannot access the long tail of less-prestigious journals, either from the developing world or the worse-funded institutions in the west. This number, which I can’t find anywhere (probably because it would be hard to estimate), could be the deal-breaker.

The other key unknown which could come down in favour of open-access is whether the financial incentives in the currently-dominant pay-to-read paradigm do indeed encourage journal editors to pick the best articles any more than they would otherwise. Why would they ever publish anything but the best?

Clearly there are reams of pros and cons—the point is that it’s difficult to know what a shift from reader-pays to writer-pays would do. Worse, it’s very hard to know what is actually desirable—what distribution of paper lengths, publication frequencies and article types allows the fastest, most thorough assimilation by scientists and thus the most rapid progress of their own work? Is that even a precise enough statement of the objectives of scientific publishing? Like many aspects of public policy, you don’t know what a given option’s effects will be and, worse, you don’t know what effects you’d actually want anyway.

The only obvious thing in this whole debate is that it’s clearly wrong for science publishers to effectively siphon public funds—be it via institutions paying to read or individual scientists paying to write—into their own profit. Cutting out the middle-man and making the whole industry public seems not to be on the table—but would an appropriately-incentivised, state-funded, open-access portfolio of journals be the ultimate in Creative Commons free-for-all science goodness?

The beautiful irony of Dr Hurum’s case is that, in spite of his noble choice of journal, his research involved two years’ hush-hush huddling in a bunker with his fossil and a hand-picked team of elite researchers. Maybe science isn’t ready to be thrown wide open just yet.