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Auber doing it

Having decided I was going to write this week’s blog about aubergines, I started to write down recipe ideas. But before long, I noticed that the main ingredient – that fleshy, squashy, shiny, ovalascent purple globe, as Nigella would no doubt have it – was being rejected by Microsoft Word. It was underlined by the squiggly red-line which appears on the screen to tell you that you’re either less clever or more clever (in the case of ‘figurality’ or ‘narratology’, for example) than your computer. When I asked for suggested alternatives, it gave me ‘aborigines’ and ‘supergenes’, neither of which would be great in ratatouille. Then, like Archimedes in the bath (only less kinky), I realised. It’s because the Americans call it an eggplant! For some strange reason they changed it and now Bill Gates gets to tell me I’m wrong.

But nothing about aubergines – in their delicious purple reality – is wrong. In fact, a whole lot is right. They soak up flavour like a mature student soaks up information in a lecture. And I have it on good authority that they taste better. Great with tomatoey, garlicky flavours and great in curry, they are delicious in pretty much any context and give real body to a meat-less meal.

Plus they began one of the best punning wars this blog has seen since its inauguration, bringing up ‘Auber my dead body’ as well as – a personal favourite – ‘Bridge auber troubled water’. Any other suggestions (aubergine themed or otherwise, the food-pun well is getting dry) would be more than welcome. Hope you enjoy the recipes…

Stuffed aubergines

This sounds like something someone in a blouse who still thinks trifle is the height of sophistication would serve on Come Dine with Me. But it’s ace – very filling, very tasty, very cheap. The aubergines themselves are the most expensive ingredient, so I serve with lots of the filling and on top of brown or white rice.

2 aubergines

2tbsp olive oil

1 onion

1 celery stick

2 cloves of garlic, crushed or finely chopped

1 tsp chopped jarred chillies

2 tsp dried mint

1 pack lamb mince

1 can plum tomatoes

2 eggs

a handful of cheddar cheese

salt and pepper

Preheat the oven to Gas 4, 180°.Chop the aubergines in half and cut or scoop on the middle (depending on how soft the aubergine is). Careful not to cut through the skin if you’re using a knife (although let’s face it, it’s not the apocalypse if you do.) KEEP THE FLESH and place the skins on a roasting tray, drizzle with oil.

Chop the onion and celery (quite finely) and heat some oil in a pan before adding them in. Allow them to cook, stirring to make sure they don’t catch. Once they’re soft add the garlic, chilli and dried mint and allow to cook with the onion until softened. Then add the aubergine innards and the mince and allow to cook for five minutes until the mince starts to brown.

Add in the can of plum tomatoes, salt and pepper and cook over a medium heat for 10-15 minutes. At the same time, place the skins in the oven. After 10 minutes remove the pan from the heat and add in the eggs (it’s best to mix them together beforehand in a bowl to break the yolks) and mix into a gloop. Remove the aubergine skins from the oven and fill the skins with the mixture, cover with some cheese and put into the oven for 10-15 minutes. Serve with rice.

Ratatouille

Serves 2 (generously)

This is a spicy and delicious version of the stuff you get in cans. (Just to get a bit Nigella, it’s great ‘tumbled’ on to baked potatoes and sprinkled with cheese.)

1 onion, sliced thinly

3 cloves of garlic, crushed or finely chopped

2 tsp chopped jarred chillies

2 courgettes

1 aubergine

1 pepper

1 lemon

1 can plum tomatoes

1 tsp sugar

salt and pepper

Chop the vegetables (the courgettes into rounds and the other two any way, as long as they’re about the same size), heat some oil in the pan and fry them. Unless you have an absolutely massive pan, it’s best to do this vegetable by vegetable as over-filling the pan will mean that they won’t fry up until golden. It’s good to get them quite brown, as they will release all the caramelised goodness into the tomatoes and that’s what makes it so delicious. It doesn’t matter if they’re not totally soft, as you’re going to cook them again.

Once they’re done, put some more oil into the pan and fry the onions on a low heat until they’re starting to soften. Add the garlic and chilli and cook for a bit longer. Add the juice of the lemon, the can of tomatoes, followed by the tsp of sugar to remove acidity. Reintroduce the vegetables and mix before covering with a lid or some tin foil (careful doing this) and cook on a low heat for 20 mins. Serve on baked potatoes.

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