Tuesday, May 6, 2025
Blog Page 1053

Cameron and Calais: scaremongering about the jungle

0

Tensions have flared up this week as French and British politicians discuss the potential ramifications of Britain’s exit from the European Union. At the centre of the squabble is the expansion of the so-called Calais jungle were the United Kingdom to leave the EU. The Calais jungle is a migrant encampment three miles from the centre of the French town of Calais, close to the Eurotunnel across the Channel. More than 5,000 refugees are thought to have found shelter in France as they attempt to reach the UK by secretly boarding lorries, ferries and trains. Living conditions are poor and the French authorities are finding it increasingly difficult to address humanitarian needs without attracting further migrants.

Until last week, only a handful of observers would have associated the Calais jungle with the Brexit dispute. That is, until Prime Minister David Cameron announced that leaving the EU would expand the Calais jungle until it would ultimately reach the UK. Political pandemonium broke out following his announcement as British politicians from all sides rose to condemn the idea and members of Cameron’s own party accused him of scaremongering.

Judging by the European press, however, the PM may not be far from the truth, and the collapse of European border control agreements may only be the first of a series of negative repercussions that will affect the United Kingdom should it leave the EU following this year’s referendum.

European newspapers were quick to react following the announcement of an EU referendum, demonstrating a blend of indignation, exasperation, but mostly confusion in the face of an ill-timed assault on European stability. Why is David Cameron doing this and why is he doing it now? The Europe Union is painfully overseeing what will be remembered as its toughest stretch in history as it scrambles to manage one crisis after the other. Naturally, between the European debt crisis, the threat of terrorism and the humanitarian crisis at its doorstep – which has triggered an unparalleled surge in immigration – the possibility of a British exit is an unwelcome addition to a pretty disastrous agenda.

Earlier this month, Germany’s Frankfurter Allgemeine ran a piece arguing that David Cameron has put a pistol to the European Union’s chest, as well as to his own, by engaging in a campaign for European reform tied to the threat of possible withdrawal. In response, European leaders will be looking to deter populists who see Brexit as a possible template for their own nationalist ambitions. Such populists include far-right leader Marine Le Pen, whose support is steadily increasing and who has publicly compared Britain leaving the EU to the fall of the Berlin wall. Deterring such rhetoric and protecting its signature projects is why the EU will punish the UK should it leave, even if it goes against its own interests. Restricting border controls between France and the UK is one of many ways in which this can be done.

A potential European backlash is only part of the problem, however, as Scottish nationalists have added themselves to the equation by threatening to press for another referendum on Scottish independence should Britain withdraw from the EU. The September 2014 referendum was closer than many expected, driving Cameron to roll up his sleeves on television in uncharacteristic fashion to convince the Scottish electorate that Britain is better together. However, with Britain out of the European Union, convincing the Scots may be a feat difficult to replicate, potentially breaking up the United Kingdom and further isolating a newly disintegrated nation.

It is therefore vitally important that Cameron obtains solid concessions from Britain’s renegotiation of its EU membership ahead of the referendum, or he may find himself tangled in laborious post-Brexit trade negotiations with displeased European neighbours in addition to fighting an uphill political battle domestically. To the desperation of Eurosceptic backbench MPs, his demands have been very carefully calibrated and some would argue watered down to increase his chances of success.

Nevertheless, no matter how keen Britain’s European partners are to maintain the UK within the Union, some commentators have argued that Cameron has picked a battle he cannot win by asking for concessions that go against principles that are at the very core of the European ideal. Such principles include the free movement of labour and the principle of non-discrimination, threatened by the Government’s call to restrict benefits to EU migrants until they have been in Britain for four years. If that is truly the case, the British Prime Minister must both rectify the UK’s zone of possible agreement and communicate more effectively his predicament to the British public ahead of the EU referendum, or else the Calais jungle will be the least of his worries.

A few home truths about voluntourism

0

After months of frenzied discussion, no consensus has prevailed on the question of the Cecil Rhodes statue. Debates held in St Anne’s JCR last weekend about whether to condemn the Rhodes Must Fall Oxford Campaign, as well as conflicting opinions voiced across a whole range of media channels – from Facebook to nationals like The Telegraph – show that opinion remains divided about the future of the statue perched on the High Street facing building of Oriel College. Regardless of your opinion on the campaign itself, it’s hard to argue that the issues these debates have raised – questions about institutional racism, colonialism and social immobility – are not pertinent beyond the scope of the campaign. The very existence of an Equality and Diversity policy at the University of Oxford, for example, is at once an admission of and a commitment to tackling discrimination based on age, disability, gender, race, religion and sexual orientation at the university.

The work done by many of the exhibitors at Oxford’s International Careers Fair can be interpreted similarly. If – unlike me – you weren’t feeling too fragile after the first essay (or two) of term, you may have headed to the event at the Careers Service on Banbury Road last Saturday. Among the exhibitors were NGOs of all shapes and sizes – from organisations looking for volunteers, to the international employers like the Red Cross – acknowledging the existence of and committing themselves to tackling social inequality in a number of sectors, from education to gender and race. I couldn’t help but think this reflected a very different type of university to the one uniquely for white men reflected in the portraits in Exam Schools, where the fair was held last year.

Fast-forward two days, and the scene is cast in a different light. A friend who’s promoting an international volunteering project aiming to improve access to education writes me a Facebook message: “My two friends who I asked to post the event on their JCR pages both said ‘no’ – they were worried about getting a backlash and being called racist.” Being part of a movement to improve access to education far from being discontinuous with the racist, sexist world represent- ed by the portraits of the Exam Schools, it was implied rather that this international volunteering project was continuous with it.

This is not without reason. It’s pretty easy to find critiques of ‘voluntourism’ – projects that masquerade as promoting equality but actually really represent a holiday and selfie opportunity for volunteers and displace local labour. Spending two weeks ‘building classrooms’ in an orphanage in Tanzania, as a friend did on a gap year, may have given them some interesting stories, but ultimately the claim that an unqualified school leaver really does the manual jobs they set out to do is belittling and, in many ways, disquieting. In this case, it overlooked the existence of local, qualified workers – people who could have done a much better job. In other words, the project relied on a belief in Western superiority that stood at odds with its expressed purpose; namely, working towards a fairer, more equal world – in this case, by trying to help give children somewhere safe to live.

Be that as it may, I was troubled by my friend’s Facebook message – having worked with the organisation it was promoting, Education Partnerships Africa, she seemed to have received a knee-jerk reaction dismissing international volunteering. The merits of the project itself didn’t seem to have been considered. After all, if providing a service no one local could provide (time, more than anything, perhaps? You could send money), working in partnership with local stakeholders to develop a deep understanding of, and then solutions to, specific issues rather than to a rigid, preconceived model, international volunteering doesn’t have to be predicated on an idea of Western superiority, but can instead promote intercultural dialogue and collaboration. I therefore think it is important to consider the issue on a case-by-case basis. It’s time to put an end to generalisations. Facing up to the reality of ‘voluntourism’ would be a valuable step in that ‘decolonising’ direction.

Debate: Should queer spaces be for LGBT people only?

0

Yes: Molly Moore

“Why are there so many gays here?” “Are you really gay?”

These are but two of the strange utterances I have overheard and been asked whilst sweating glitter and dancing my queer butt off at Plush. “Plush is a gay club?” I hear you whisper, to which I reply, “Plush is a proudly queer space.” As such, it is no surprise that as a club it hosts LGBTQ+ Society’s Tues-gay club night, nor is it a shock that people of the same gender can regularly be found making out on the premises. Indeed, at the entrance you’re even greeted with a sign explicitly informing you that you are about to enter a queer space. I greatly admire the steps taken by Plush to create an environment which makes people aware of the nature of the establishment they’re about to enter. What I don’t quite understand is the volume of people who seem surprised that there are LGBT folks in Plush once they have walked through the door.

I kissed my girlfriend at MNB (shock horror) once. We were harassed and assaulted by at least three diff erent guys, including one who made the absurd assumption that somehow, by kissing, my girlfriend and I were inviting him to join in with us. The worst part is that in a club widely regarded as ‘very straight’, my girlfriend and I were then essentially told in no uncertain terms by our heteronormative society that we should expect this kind of thing, that it is in some way normal, and the perpetrators of acts of violence should not be held responsible. We weren’t in Plush, after all. And maybe two girls were only 
kissing for the bantz? But would you believe me if I told you the same thing happened to me in the recently-deceased Babylove – yesteryear’s LGBT space of choice? Or that in Plush, a guy once told me he would fi nd it sexy to watch me make out with another girl?

Queer spaces are not void of lurid behaviour, leery guys, and the lingering threat that someone of a diff erent gender might attempt to chirpse you. However, those responsible for carrying out disrespectful actions in queer spaces towards queer people seem almost unanimously to be cisgender and heterosexual. As an out queer woman, I choose to wear my identity as armour. I inhabit my own queer space. Yet all too often, my personal space comes under attack from people who don’t respect the nature of queer spaces, or neglect to understand how rare such environments are.

I challenge any non-queer Oxford student to name the spaces they would consider to be inherently queer. Did someone say Plush? LGBTQ+ Society Drinks? Well aside from internalised college meetups, liberation campaigns and drinks events, queer spaces are almost non-existent in Oxford and beyond. With that in mind, I’m sure it’s easier to understand why LGBT people so value the right to have our own spaces, free from invasion by non-queer people. When LGBT charities are dropping like fl ies due to government cuts, like anti-domestic violence charity Broken Rainbow or LGBT mental health charity PACE, it becomes increasingly more important to preserve the environments in which queer people are told we matter, are valued, and can have our voices heard. While such spaces are rapidly decreasing, non-queer people seem to be feeling the overwhelming need to invade our safe spaces simply for the sake of a good night, or because it’s in some way their right.

Cisgender, heterosexual people are at the top of the social food chain, and growing up, the world assumes that everyone adheres to these ‘norms’ unless otherwise stated. Maybe in a world in which queer people don’t have to ‘out’ ourselves I’ll be receptive to non-queer people entering LGBT spaces. The unfortunate reality is that the world doesn’t appear to be changing fast enough for such a thing to happen. The issue is a complex one after all, as queer identities are nonbinary, diverse, innumerable, and outside of the defi nitions societal hegemony has constructed. Queer people may visibly appear to be ‘straightpassing’. For example, they may appear to fit the definition of a typic a l ‘heterosexual’ couple. But how are we to know if that’s really the case? We know that it is impossible to enforce policing of anyone’s sexuality or gender, and I don’t believe that is something LGBT people should be advocating. Our bodies and identities are policed already; our bodies are property; our bodies are toys, objects to be judged and laughed at.

The safety of LGBT people is paramount, and as Women’s Welfare Rep for the LGBTQ+ Society and Christ Church JCR’s LGBTQ+ Welfare Offi cer, my main aim is to protect the right for queer people to be safe. Sadly, this is not possible when non-queer people assume the right to enter queer spaces. LGBT people shouldn’t have to give evidence for our identities. Instead, we should be able to trust that the people around us aren’t cishet and easily off ended by queer culture. Our identities are fetishised and mocked in places we are told belong to us, and we’ve had enough.

I’m not asking for segregation when I say that only LGBT people should be allowed in queer spaces. I’m demanding respect for our identities, alongside the preservation of our culturally signifi cant and vital spaces. Yes, we know Plush is a great night out. But it’s our night out. I’m tired of hearing tales of stray heterosexuals wandering into the Plush toilets to vent in fury at “all the gays” they’ve seen on the dancefloor. However, until society ceases to spew its ingrained heteronormative and cissexist values, there is no room for non-queer people in queer spaces – especially when I have to battle through hordes of horny straight men just to be able to kiss my girlfriend safely. My identity is no one’s plaything, and so many LGBT people depend on exclusively queer spaces just to feel valid, visible and alive. Queer only spaces are our lifeline.

No: Jack Schofield

With increasing LGBT liberation, a trend of rising LGBT positivity among young people in particular, and let’s face it, better music and a fun culture, it is not surprising that straight people wish to be part of queer spaces, be that genuinely out of support, just to have a good time, or to make them feel good about themselves as allies, without actually doing anything. Whether the queer community should provide for that inclination is a complex debate, and should be argued asking what will be best for the LGBT community, as that is all that matters here.

Firstly, tempting though it may be to claim, society is not so unsafe that we need to create an entirely separate community for members of the LGBT community. Rather, those of us who can should seek to be members of society precisely like anyone else, in such a way as to show cis, straight people just how common queerness is, and how it has no impact on a person’s ability to work hard and be a fun person that anyone would wish to be around. Nice as it would be not to be dependent on our homophobic society, we simply cannot cut ourselves away from it, and so we must allow cishet people into our spaces to show that queer people are not different, but a normal and valuable part of our society.

Furthermore, it is directly through allowing cis straight people into our spaces that they are most likely to become all the more sympathetic to the cause of LGBT liberation, which in turn will help improve society. I would certainly wager that the more queer friends one has, the less likely it is to be an issue for them. It is a well known fact that humans fear the unknown; anti-immigrant views are most prevalent in areas where no immigrants are to be found, for example. In this way, letting cishet people in ‘normalises’ queerness and thus reduces the need for safe spaces.

A further important point is that the LGBT community has something of a duty to help closeted queer people. Until you come out as lesbian, gay, bisexual or trans, you evidently claim to be cis and straight, and so it simply cannot be assumed that all professedly cisgender, straight people going to Plush, gay bars, or attending LGBTQ+ Society drinks are not, in fact, queer. In my own experience, occasionally attending LGBTQ+ Society drinks while closeted massively helped to give me the confidence to come out, and I believe we would be doing a great disservice to other people if we were to knowingly make that painful process even harder.

Keeping events open allows queer people to have the broadest possible support network if and when they do come out, which is invaluable. Similarly, some queer people might want a friend to accompany them to their first few queer events, and that friend might not be queer themselves. This too should be borne in mind; consider the negative impacts that restricting entry could have on the very people such a policy would be supposed to help. I do, however, recognise that there are some queer spaces which should not be open to nonqueer people, such as support groups, whether online or in person. While a discussion group, such as NoHeterOx, should be open to all, there are other circumstances where LGBT people rightly want to talk openly only to those in the very best position to understand and help them in the right way, and that is those in the same boat as them.

In any case, while I strongly believe queer spaces should generally be open to all, this does not mean that anything goes. In queer discussion forums which are open to all, no cis, straight person should talk over a queer person, and generally speaking, cis, straight people should be there to listen and learn, and yes, to contribute a bit too. There is a simple reason for this: society at large is geared towards cishet lives and voices. Queer spaces must therefore remain places in which queerness prevails and queer people feel entirely safe to express themselves, however they wish. So if a straight man is hit on by a gay man in a queer space, they do not get to be off ended or awkward about it; queer people are allowed to assume any random person in a queer space is queer (in some way) while still accepting that they aren’t necessarily, because there is nowhere else in our lives that this assumption can be made.

Naturally, any person who is being homophobic or transphobic in a queer space should be required to leave, as the right of any person to enjoy queer spaces only goes so far. Regarding the controversy over the ever-popular Queerfest at Wadham last term, I agree it is unfair that an LGBT person wishing to attend a celebration of queerness and queer culture should miss out to swathes of cis, straight people, and that those ‘allies’ should reflect on their actions.

With this said – and I think cis, straight people wishing to make use of queer spaces would do well to have taken particular note of the last paragraph – I wish to convey a positive message that queer culture is something to be celebrated and something which can truly liberate us all. With gender roles in society seeking to limit every single one of us, queer and non-queer people alike benefit enormously from an increasing right to ‘be yourself’ beyond such things. Everyone would benefit hugely from coming to accept just how diverse humanity is and that there is creativity in and much to be learnt from the range of personalities which we all would naturally have, if we were given the message that being who we are, as we are, was fine.

Such a cultural change in society at large will make (and is already making) it easier and easier to come out as LGBT. As our relationship with labelling and fear of the Other reduces, queer identities will become less and less of an issue. This will only come about through openness on our part and our subsequent increasing visibility as everyday members of society

Luminaries: William Shatner

0

Canadian-born Shatner’s career can only be summed up by reference to the Queen lyrics he reads out (it would be wrong to say he actually sings them) in a recent advert for a travel agency: “is this the real life or is this just fantasy?” The utterly surreal nature of his glittering film, television and spoken word career has no bounds. It is almost Lynchian. You can practically imagine him as a character in Twin Peaks.

If you look at some of the great cult television programmes, he appears. He is there. Often for baffling reasons, or as a joke, but he is there nonetheless. The Twilight Zone. Star Trek. The Simpsons. Family Guy. He is ubiquitous in popular culture.

Generation upon generation has been reared on Shatner. My own first memory of him was less illustrious: his brief foray into Crunchie Nut adverts in the 2000s. But after that I saw him in films like Miss Congeniality, quirky legal dramas like Boston Legaland eventually the second greatest episode of The Twilight Zone, the much-parodied ‘Nightmare at 20,000 Feet’.

But, beyond Star Trek and his Hoff-like meme status in popular culture, he is also a published science fiction novelist, director and spoken-word behemoth. TekWar, his science fiction saga, has given rise to comics, video games and television adaptations. Who can forget his rendition of ‘Rocket Man’? Or ‘Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds’?

Seemingly no-one continues to make as many appearances on television as Shatner. He has hosted numerous awards ceremonies, comedy and panel shows, far beyond his native Canada and the United States. Saturday Night Live and Have I Got News For You are just two institutions where his appearance will be remembered. And for some, remembered in infamy.

To put it simply, there is only one William Shatner. And that is his biggest draw. 

We fought a war for this

0

Dad’s Army has been too many years in the making. If only it took even longer then I would have spent my time more wisely and productively. I could have re-arranged my underpants under the Library of Congress system, or taken up seppuku as a hobby. Either pursuit would have been more productive than casting my eyes on the film equivalent of Martin O’Malley’s presidential bid. It just keeps going on and on, and you want to put it out of its misery. You look through your hands in horror, only to find your fingers have become the bars of the prison that is the auditorium. It is less entertainment than a prison sentence.

If, of course, your prison is also a residential nursing home. It’s as if the entire film has been cynically targeted at the elderly. 10 minutes in, Godfrey pisses on Jones in a ‘subtle’ attempt at humour. As if the geriatric golden shower wasn’t enough, we see Michael Gambon wearing a Hawaiian skirt. What larks! The only conclusion I can come to is that the writer hoped that anyone who remembers the brilliance, the love and the warmth of the original series has gone senile. Judging by the audience in the cinema with me, that might’ve been a canny move. But, amongst the sea of John McDonnell-lookalikes was a lone lady who laughed all the way through. I can only assume she was high from a warfarin overdose.

It does have a great ensemble. Bill Nighy. Catherine Zeta-Jones. Tom Courtenay. Legends of British cinema. But, it amazed me how they managed to assemble such a good cast and use them so poorly. There is only one single logical explanation I can find for the woeful caricatures of the original actors. They’re actually life-size cardboard cutouts. The sort you get peering out of student rooms. The producers have gone on Amazon and looked for cutouts of people who look vaguely like the original cast. If you’ve suffered a botched cataract operation in the last 15 years.

Bill Nighy isn’t playing Sergeant Wilson. He’s playing Bill Nighy. Lynn from Alan Partridge is playing Mrs Mainwaring. And though she’s one of the better characters in the film, she was never seen in the original. Blake Harrison is playing some weird sex-obsessed version of Pike. But of course, this film is seemingly intended to be viewed solely by old ladies who gave birth through asexual reproduction. Hence any innuendo is immediately followed up with a completely unsubtle explanation of why it is not innuendo at all. “I’m on top tonight,” says Mrs Mainwaring, only to then spell out that she’s on top bunk directly afterwards. It’s like William Gladstone has risen from the dead and censored the script with a blue pencil before giving it to Saga Norén for a rewrite.

The sheer frustration I felt watching it. How the hell could they screw it up so badly? They barely played up the nostalgia factor, perhaps the biggest draw for the film, while the comic delivery seemed to have been inspired by Microsoft Sam. I didn’t even attempt to laugh: the amount of energy needed would surely have turned me into dust like the Nazi at the end of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. If there was a straight choice between watching the film again and decomposition, I’d chose the latter. Now that would be choosing wisely.

You know, I’d have given Dad’s Army one star, but that would be unfair on the preceding advert for Butcher’s dog food. Even the ad by the South African tourist board was a better example of cinematography. The special effects team managed to make a pigeon look unrealistic. If British cinema can’t make a good computer generated pigeon when there are literally millions outside a bloody window, then what hope is there for us as a nation? 

Street Sport

0

Photography:  James Alexander Lyon

Hair and Makeup: Brothers Oxford

Creatives: Kim Darrah – Ella Harding – Harry Sampson

Models: Nicole Rayment – Chloé Delanney

 

 

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12923%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12928%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12925%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12929%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12926%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12930%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12927%%[/mm-hide-text]

[mm-hide-text]%%IMG_ORIGINAL%%12924%%[/mm-hide-text]

Astounding concept, flawed execution

0

★★★★☆

Before this evening, I had never seen a live improvised comedy show in my life. I was excited but a little bit worried about the imminent threat of audience involvement, which the Imps were so insistent would be a part of this show. I entered the Simpkins Lee theatre and plucked up the courage to sit at the very front – this turned out to be a very good decision.

The whole concept behind Hyperdrive is to do something genuinely innovative – to take that flourishing medium of improv, with all of its infinitudes of possibilities, and to smash it unrelentingly into the glittering world of internet communication, social media, and the silicon valley age. This show got off to a phenomenal start, with a ‘loading screen’ from three enormous projectors exclaiming that the systems were doing a wide variety of preparatory tasks – ranging from “Inquiring about the ethical standards of Oxford tattoo artists”, “re-evaluating life choices”, “annexing Crimea”, “problematizing gender binaries”, “testing burning jet fuel on steel beams”, and most intriguingly for me, “seducing reviewers”.

One of the driving gimmicks of the show was the promise of setting up a tinder account, to be managed by a member of the audience over the course of the evening. The pictures and bio of the account were decided through a poll, which the audience voted for on their phones; the outcome of which was a picture of a sliced ham, and a description that pertained to Winston Churchill’s penchant for “dank ass kush”.  This tinder account was then entrusted to an unsuspecting audience member, with the promise of building improv around the conversations that ensued; the audience were able to submit opening lines on a rolling feed on the projector screen.

Sadly, despite the 60+ matches that the ham was able to get on tinder, there was a lack of any substance to the ensuing flirtations which could have led to sketches – as one of the imps was forced to concede “well it doesn’t look like that’s going anywhere”. This was the first in a series of technical mishaps, which prevented this show from fully realising its potential. The next bit involved the Imps improvising a serenade over facetime for the girlfriend of an audience member. Sadly, the girlfriend failed to pick up on facetime, so the Imps were left singing and being filmed on a phone – still very funny and impressive, but not quite realising the potential of the show.

The improv sketches got of to a very good start – a series of images sourced using audience contribution and google made the backbone of a ‘what we did on our honeymoon’ sketch – with the married imps completely unaware of what was going to come up next on the slideshow. Similarly, a sketch where one imp had to read alternate lines from a random text conversation, whilst the other desperately forged a narrative out of the ensuing nonsensicality was incredibly impressive to watch.

The bulk of the improv was built around an audience member’s facebook profile, which was projected onto the big screen – all of the joys of profile pictures from 5 years ago, group chat nicknames and context-less timeline posts forming the heart of a series of sketches which careened wildly from a communist Disneyland, to an art exhibition featuring the director of the Imps turning himself into a burrito. An extended bit about Mary Somerville not getting onto the five pound note was enjoyable, until I realised that this Imps line up was comprised of seven white men and one woman – something about glass houses and stones might have been appropriate here.

Overall, this is a very funny show – packed to the gunnels with energy and some very bright ideas. It took the audience a little while to get into the swing of it, but the comedy really shone when the randomness of social media shone the light on little hints of shared understandings and common truths. It’s a shame that the Imps were occasionally let down by the technology that this show is so reliant on, but I hope this company continues to innovate and come up with this sort of exciting and boundary pushing comedy. 

Poetry Bites: HT16 week 4

0

Rain dance by Steve Wright

What a thrill to be out and about in the rain

without socks or shoes or even a mac.

It’s probably unsafe but we can catch our

death of cold together. Look how the drops

dance on puddles like the skin of a drum,

like a pudding left too long in the air.

I went out in a storm when I was six

and lathered my hair with apple and pear.

You should have seen the neighbours stare,

and my mum behind the curtains in creases.

So slap the puddles with your feet,

give the rain something to dance for.

 

Note:

With the frequent February showers Oxford has been experiencing over the past week, Steve Wright finds joy in english weather through poetry. Also contained is a useful life hack for those struggling to make the time to wash in the lead up to fifth week.

Poetry Bites: HT16 week 3

0

A study in urban botany

17/1/16

On the bridge behind the Tescos

Sprouting out from the cracks of the pavement

There’s a small, delicate blue plaque

Pinned tastefully to the railings. It reads:

‘Geranium Robertianum flowered here

From June to October 2014’.

The railings have been lovingly repainted

And the pavement has been recently swept-

There isn’t a weed in sight.

 

In the doorway of a McDonalds

Two homeless men crouch on plastic bags

Discussing where best to spend the night.

 

Author’s note:

This experience with the plaque did genuinely happen to me whilst out running in Oxford one evening last week- it struck me as such an absurd moment that I had to write it down. After writing it I felt it needed something else – whilst walking to a tutorial the next day I saw the homeless on Cornmarket Street, and I realised how the poem had to end. I like the fact that the comparison gives the poem a whole new level of meaning- looking at what really proliferates on our streets, plants or people.

Poetry Bites: HT16 week 2

0

The Arctic Tern’s Prayer

tell the air to hold me in the rushing heart of it

and keep its paths straight

away from home let there be a land that

flows with fish and flies

and let it taste like it tasted at home

home take this salty scent of home from my head

cut away the memory of its last ultraviolet

flash beautiful beneath me

don’t turn me to a twist of salt to fall to

sea’s saltiness if I look back at my home

let me look back just once let me

look back

 

Note:

This poem is published in Flight, an anthology in response to the refugee crisis, which launched on the 1st of February. Artic terns spend summer in the UK and winter in the Antartic. Annual round trips extend up to an estimated 90,000 km.