Jimmy Bullard has a reputation as a great old-fashioned professional, a throw back to the days before agents and Bentleys, when a roast was something the players’ wives cooked on Sunday afternoons.

But the way Bullard has conducted himself regarding his move from Fulham FC to Hull City would shame Ashley Cole.  In September 2006 Bullard collided with Newcastle’s Scott Parker and ruined his knee ligaments.  He didn’t play again for sixteen months – until January 2008.  His return coincided with the arrival of Roy Hodgson, who orchestrated a miraculous escape from relegation.

A strong second half of the season led to a call up to the England squad in August 2008 – although he did not play in either game.  And how did Bullard react to this? By thanking the staff of Fulham FC for spending sixteen months rehabilitating him, which made his call up possible? No – he demanded a new contract with wages an England international (of sorts) deserved.

Roy Hodgson, understanding that his demands were beyond the club’s means, and that Danny Murphy is the true midfield general at Fulham, said no.  So Jimmy Bullard turned his back on Fulham and went up north to Hull City, who met his demands.  While he can claim that he has moved from the tenth placed team to the ninth placed one, Hull are sustained by a freakish run in Autumn but collapsing form since. Fulham, meanwhile, have the fourth best defence in England and one of the canniest managers around.  Only one of those teams risks getting sucked into the relegation mire, and it’s not the Cottagers.

It wouldn’t be a great shock if Hull City find themselves back in the Coca-Cola Championship next season.  And what then for good old fashioned honest pro Jimmy Bullard?

He’s gone feral. Which means he’s back in the news. Governor Rod Blagojevich has continued his recent series of surreal Friday press conferences, this week saying some truly strange things in that same strange way. It’s getting to the point where the best way to describe his approach is beyond parody. This week was just hilarity. But such well-delivered, mock-sincere, confidently-argued hilarity.

Some highlights: Speaking of the Illinois senators who will conduct his impeachment trial:”they’re just hanging me.” Responding to reporters enquiries about how his family was coping, he told them the day he was arrested was “what Pearl Harbour Day was to the United States.” He won’t attend his Senate trial, nor will he send witnesses or even an attorney, saying that to do so would itself be an “impeachable offense.” (Even when half-joking he seems fairly crazy).

And today, the news that, on Monday, he’ll make his first national TV appearance, on ABC’s Good Morning America, followed by an appearance on The View with his wife Patti (for whom it’s hard not to feel pretty sorry).

I can’t find the word: he’s not brilliant, that would be too positive. But there is something special and altogether interesting about someone so brash and defiant after having been (it would seem) so stupid and corrupt. He’ll quote Kipling and Tennyson at you. He’ll claim (as he did yesterday) that, if he’s impeached, it will lead to tax increases for Illinoisans. He’ll drag his poor wife onto The View to be gently assaulted by Barbara Walters, Whoopi Goldberg, et al. You don’t ever really believe he’s innocent, nor do you admire him. But you do think this guy knows how to work a news cycle.

My thought: When you read a bit about Blagojevich, his character and personality, all this stuff makes sense. To him, it’s a strategy. It’s part get your face out there, part say it enough and they’ll believe you’re innocent, part do what’s most ballsy. If nothing else, it’s entertaining (at least for those of us are not governed by him). He’ll be impeached, but somehow I doubt he’ll go away.

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In this new bipartisan Washington, it’s refreshing to find that President Obama hasn’t forgotten that sometimes, when push comes to shove, he has a right to try to get his own way.

Republican congressional leaders had started to get a little irritated by the stimulus package: where particular funds would go, in what form money would be given back to consumers – agreeing in principle of the need for a package but trying to fight for some concessions to report back to the caucus.

The President hosted all the Congressional leaders – Democratic and Republican – for a closed-door meeting in the Roosevelt room, across the hall from the Oval Office. Sources said he listened to their concerns, noted where they disagreed and why. Then he spoke, at length, of the need for the package, of the need to act to avert a “grave situation”.

And then, as he neared the end of his summation, he reminded his opponents matter-of-factly: “I won.”

Nice to see that 70 million popular votes still count for something.

You can tell this is a President with a very handy 68-12 approval rating. In terms of approval, that’s 4 points behind Kennedy’s after his first few days on the job. It’s 10 points ahead of Clinton, 11 ahead of his predecessor, and 17 ahead of Reagan at the same stage. Not bad considering the circumstances.

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Lastly, one for the nerds (myself included, clearly). A reporter at Huffington Post has managed to get a leaked copy of House Resolution 1, the draft stimulus bill. It’s obviously extremely long and boring, but it’s ‘fun’ to at least look at the first few pages of what will very likely become the first piece of major legislation of the Obama era.

When evaluating full backs, it’s easy to get drawn towards attention grabbing attacking play rather than defensive consistency.  The highest profile left back of the modern era – Roberto Carlos – had a reputation founded on this sort of thing.  But whether he was a better defender than Bixente Lizarazu, or even Graeme le Saux, was overlooked.

So in picking the left back for our World XI we have to be wary of such players, whose cavalier instincts distract from their failure to function as an effective roundhead when needed.  This is why Gaël Clichy and Philipp Lahm don’t make the cut.  Similarly with Éric Abidal, whose defensive liabilities have forced Pep Guardiola to dust off the 34 year old Sylvinho in recent months.

This left me with a short list of Ashley Cole, Patrice Evra and Gianluca Zambrotta.  The criteria were defensive reliability, experience, pace and the ability to genuinely hurt the opposition in the final third.  First to go was Zambrotta.  As much as his versatility and reliablity – not to forget his World Cup winners’ medal – counts for, his lost pace puts him behind the Premier League options.

Choosing between Cole and Evra is difficult.  There’s one inch between them in height. six months in age, two Premier League titles each.  They’ve both been exceptional for the last year or so: defensively flawless, incisive in attack, and able to keep competent deputies out of the side – forcing Mikaël Silvestre and Wayne Bridge to move to Arsenal and Manchester City respectively. 

But I’m just going to go for Patrice Evra.  As good as Cole has been, the quality of Evra in the last year or so has been phenomenal.  His pace and energy – ninety minutes of full length pitch sprints twice a week – is reminiscent of the great Cafu.  His runs into the final third – dragging the right back wide – creates the space for Cristiano Ronaldo to gallop into.  And his crossing is better than most top flight midfielders. 

Jack’s Word XI

• Iker Casillas (Real Madrid and Spain)
• Patrice Evra (Manchester United and France)

Government Science Minister Lord Drayson visited Oxford this week, meeting academics and students for a pilot ‘town hall’-style consultation.

The meeting, on Friday 23^rd January in the plush new biochemistry building, was focussed on how the government could facilitate and stimulate scientific investigation with a view to developing intellectual-property–based industries which could help us through the current economic downturn.

Drayson is an unusual minister in that he does have a scientific background—having completed a PhD in robotics, he founded a highly successful spin-off company, PowderJect Pharmaceuticals, which was bought out for $800m in 2003. This grounding seems to have given him something of a prejudice towards business-based solutions, and a drive to generate more, and more profitable, spin-offs from UK university science departments.

I asked the Minister to outline what research had been done or had been commissioned into the economic and social benefits of scientific research and science outreach, in particular whether UK involvement in the European Space Agency’s manned spaceflight programme, for which he has expressed vocal support, represents good value for money as a tool to inspire schoolchildren. He said that an independent investigation into the merits of the manned programme had been commissioned, but conceded that he didn’t have the knowledge to assess the current ‘balance’ of research in different fields. He also believed that having a scientifically-trained Science Minister could not be relied upon, and therefore it was crucial that scientists, not ministers, should be in charge of allocating research funding.

Asked about the post–post-doc career bottleneck, Drayson replied that the fundamental problem of there being too few academic positions was systemic and insoluble. However, he wondered about the capabilities of entrepreneurship and business, saying that more could be done to encourage research careers in industry, or founding of spin-off companies by post-docs.

There was some concern about the difficulties of getting financial support for ‘high-risk’, blue-skies research in a climate where funding bodies are increasingly asking for applications to be listed on grant proposals. He asked the audience whether this was a general feeling. ‘Yes,’ we responded, in unison. Refreshingly free of political obfuscation, Drayson replied simply ‘I’ll look into it.’

First the good news, OxStu’s laying is much tidier and has some proper news this week. Librarian also much funnier.

And for the Stu hacks, managing to run another front page story about Wafic Said (known in OUSU towers as THE DEVIL INCARNATE) must rank up there with Christmas. Not able to blame him for the single-handed destruction of the University and possibly the world, they satisfy themselves with reminding readers about the ‘arms deal’ he organised with Saudi Arabia. Nudge nudge, wink wink.

That said, at least it involved some journalistic research. Cherwell lucked out with the timing of the anti-Israel protest. They also managed to somehow run yet another ‘students may possibly use study drugs’ piece. Could they find anyone willing to admit to using them? No, but one anonymous student could ‘definitely understand’ why people might, occasionally feel like they wanted them. Definitely worth a story then.

Josh interview: LOL. He sounded like a celeb whose just checked into rehab and is now doing a tell-all about those heady drug-addled days. 

Elsewhere, the Stu apparently couldn’t think of an ending to their grad job piece. It finishes “Oxford students just don’t answer the questions properly on ap-…”

It also managed to spin a whole page of news out of ‘controversial’ JCR motions, and an article on the ever-thrilling subject of NUS constitutional reforms. Woop.

The features were a bit more interesting though.

As for interviews, Tim Brabants and Frank Turner anyone?? It’s become painfully obvious how much both rags are relying on the Union for anyone notable.  

Cherwell might be going a bit over-board on the whole international front. Comment, editorial and feature on Israel conflict, and 2 features with Obama’s pretty face. Remeber, you are a student newspaper. Even if some ex-hacksdid manage to buy a plane tickets for the inauguration.

Round 2 to Cherwell. Just.

The Saint. x