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Freddy the Fresher: Part Four

‘Hello? Yes, hi- I’d like to book a table for two. Tonight, at 7 o’clock. That sounds great, see you then!’ He hangs up and gulps. It’s done, he’s committed to it.Freddy is going on a date with Bernadette.

It had taken him three days of studying together before he’d plucked up the
courage to ask her to lunch – in the cafeteria of the social sciences library – and they had both eaten their pizza and chips whilst discussing the relative
merits of the fourth and fifth French republics. The chat had flown as freely as
the Diet Coke.

It took him another few days before he had been confi dent enough to properly ask her out. His prep work had been sound: thorough Facebook stalking to assertain whether or not she was in a relationship, Googling her to look for intimidating personal achievements (‘She’s a former Hampshire 800m district champion!?!’) and then scripting an intricate ‘ask girl out on date’ play.

He had finally plucked up the courage as they had walked back down Jowett
Walk: ‘Would you be free to get a bite of dinner tomorrow?’ She looked at him oddly, ‘A bite of dinner?’ 

Shit! This wasn’t in the script- in his head, he had asked her that, she had, swooning slightly, accepted, and then he would pretend to have a seminar at the American Institute, thus avoiding any potentially awkward conversation.

‘As in, would be free to get dinner with me? My college father told me about this cool place on Little Clarendon Street and I thought-’, he shrugged, ‘-I thought you might like to come with me…’ He leaves the offer there, lingering in the thick, river-basiney Oxford air.

‘Ok. Sure- why not?’ Why not indeed! His heart soars like an eagle and child.

 And that is how Freddy found himself having dinner, in Pierre Victoire, with the cleverest, prettiest, most-privately educated girl he’d ever met. Their shared bowl of mussels is as deep as his passion; their condiments as saucy as their banter; their romantic candle as hot as the thoughts running through his head…

And that night – after leaving the restaurant, via a cocktail bar – Freddy found himself alone in Bernadette’s immaculate college set. Suffice it to say, that night involved inflation and numerous double-dips…

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