Thursday 16th October 2025
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Top 5 Songs to listen to while playing croquet

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Croquet is one of those things that reeks of Oxford. Close your eyes and picture a group in blazers and sun dresses tottering around a lawn. Now lose that image and accept that croquet is just an excuse for day time drinking and procrastination in the sun. 

1. ‘All The Small Things’ – Blink-182

Croquet is, without a doubt, a game for those who like the small things in life.

2. ‘Bitch’ – The Rolling Stones

Playing croquet with frenemies might be cathartic, as you smash their balls to the other side of the lawn.

3. ‘We’re All In This Together’ – High School Musical

Croquet is very much a team game, as expressed by this sickly song.

4. ‘No Need To Argue’ – The Cranberries

Warning: don’t play croquet with your significant other. Arguments will follow.

5. ‘Sunny Afternoon’ – The Kinks

Grab a couple of Stellas and head to your croquet lawn – there are few better ways to spend a sunny afternoon.

Live Review: Years & Years

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Last Monday saw the all conquering Years & Years roll into Oxford, fresh off of chart successes with smash singles ‘King’ and ‘Desire’. Playing to a sold out crowd at Cowley’s 02 Academy, the band showed why they’re amongst the most buzzed about bands in the UK, with a high energy infectious set that remained winsome even whilst the band’s relative newcomer status shone a little brightly.

The band ostensibly comprises three members, but even with an extra joining them for their live set, Years & Years remains essentially a solo act. The star is Olly Alexander, former Skins actor turned pop frontman, who engaged the crowd and seemed to be the main beneficiary of the adoring shrieks coming from the O2’s packed out first few rows. His voice soared across octaves, distinct enough never to get lost amongst the live instrumentation, malleable enough to run the gamut of tempos and emotions his songs cover.

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His performance connected with the excitable electricity within the often sneakily sinister lyrics that make Years & Years’ pop so fascinating. But up on stage, the slight Alexander didn’t entirely command. An endearingly sweet presence, he still seems overjoyed at this point in his band’s success that anybody is responding to them at all. Yet that he didn’t demand the audience’s attention hardly mattered, as his adoring followers gave it to him willingly. Every frenetic dance move or excitable jump elicited a huge response from the hugely game crowd, and his attempts to engage the back of the room were a nice touch. It’ll be interesting to see how long his wide eyed exuberance and humility can be maintained, as Years & Years complete their ascent to the top tier of UK acts.

Nevertheless, they barrelled through a set list that a less generous reviewer may critique as being a little front loaded with familiar hits. But when every song is a crowd pleaser – a position Years & Years fortunately find themselves in – it hardly matters. New single ‘Shine’ went down particularly well, and the band’s older tracks like ‘Take Shelter’ were received rapturously. The band tackled a tricky situation well; with their debut album not coming out until later this month, they’re still playing to crowds that at best can only be passingly familiar with the band’s oeuvre. But the new material sat alongside the prerelease singles nicely, and Alexander’s frequent trips to his sit down keyboard lent further variety to an already well crafted set. Years & Years delivered an immensely promising show from a young band. Despite not having fitted Oxford into their upcoming October tour, Alexander’s frequent expression of joy at the band’s reception suggest they’ll be back sooner rather than later.

Review: Jason Derulo – Everything is 4

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I’ve got to hand it to Derulo. For a man whose music fame is based on singing his own name, he is surprisingly skilled at being consistently mediocre. His songs aren’t bad, but they’re not good either. He caters perfectly for the disappointingly large amount of people who claim they like all music – inoffensive, moderately catchy and generic. Derulo’s latest offering is no exception. His lyrics, which continue to be rather amusing (“get ugly, you’re too sexy for me”), are delivered with his trademark severity.

The lead single, ‘Want To Want Me’, is decidedly bland, even lacking the customary catchy chorus. Others, including ‘Try Me’, sound a bit like Blue with a new lick of 2015 pop paint – unoriginal and uninteresting. Derulo is at a well-established stage in his career where he should be experimenting, perhaps even taking some risks, but instead he has chosen to use the old tried and tested formula, with the resulting album being an easily forgettable piece of pop/R&B.

Saying that, Derulo does make a half-arsed attempt at a ballad, but it lacks the sincerity to be a true success, turning into a upbeat poptastic track half way. I may have approached this album with low expectations but they weren’t even reached. 

Review: DJ Antoine – I Woke Up Like This

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The latest offering from Swiss DJ and producer DJ Antoine is, as we have come to expect, an absolute banger. The single features another artist known as Storm, who no one has ever heard of and probably never will again. Mad Mark also features in an indeterminate role. ‘I Woke Up Like This’ celebrates the “24/7” lifestyle which revolves primarily around the “money money money money money” that continental Europeans seem to aspire to, although the reference to the “premier league” suggests that DJ Antoine is seeking to break into the British market.

While the use of repetition is prevalent, DJ Antoine demonstrates a surprisingly high level of lyrical versatility, with a particular highlight being “I’m drinking coffee and Jack at 6am on my back”. Musically, the single bears similarities to every other eurotrash track that has ever been produced: excessive use of cut off, gratuitous side-chain compression and of course squalid drops. The single features a particularly sordid bass, which is dropped in and out in such a way as to keep listeners guessing.

We can expect the music video to contain bikini-clad women, sand and probably several forms of transport. Is ‘I Woke Up Like This’ as good as the legendary ‘Ma Cherie’? Probably not, but it represents a valuable addition to the corpus of cheeky offerings from across the channel.

Interview: Spector

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When Fred Macpherson starts talking, it’s not quite the ‘Fred’ I’m expecting. I imagine the Fred I saw at gigs in my late teens, flamboyant and ostentatious, willing and ready to whip out a comb and preen himself at any moment on stage with self-conscience pretentiousness. I imagine the nominee for ‘Best Twitter’ and ‘Villain of the Year’ at the 2013 NME awards. But this frontman seems different: the charisma’s all there, but it’s quieter than I anticipated.

Formed in 2011 and nominated for the BBC’s Sound of 2012 poll, Spector’s debut album Enjoy It While It Lasts did pretty well. With new singles ‘All the Sad Young Men’ (premiered as Zane Lowe’s ‘Hottest Record in the World’) and ‘Bad Boyfriend’ out, a second album is imminent. Perhaps Macpherson’s vaguely subdued tone is the result of the pencil-pushing that’s preoccupying the band in the run-up to the release of their as-yet-untitled album. When Macpherson mentions they’re trying to get the artwork sorted I wonder if they’ve ever considered producing something themselves, but he confesses they find it hard enough to design a t-shirt, let alone an album cover. Three years since the release of their debut album, it doesn’t seem that Spector have felt the traditional rush to get a follow-up out.

Having read that the new album is all about honesty, I wonder if that’s made it quite a selfindulgent project. Macpherson doesn’t dismiss the idea, but he argues that something like therapy also indulges the self and in the process might make you a more bearable person. He thinks this album’s more honest than its predecessor and explains that he finds it easier to be honest through lyrics than talking, maybe even with a close friend.

Our conversation moves to talk of Macpherson’s hometown, London. Whilst he says he’ll always feel like a Londoner, it’s clear that he feels a growing dissatisfaction, even disillusionment with his city, “It does feel like it’s being socially-cleansed and all of the fun bits of it are being closed and phased out.” He highlights how London’s once vibrant musical culture is being marginalised to make way for the expensive, often empty flats of the corporate elite. Looking ahead to five years under a Tory government, Macpherson seems pretty bleak.

Responding to suggestions from some of his contemporaries that they have no interest in politics, he wrote an article for Q Magazine in the run up to the general election arguing that even if musicians do not wish to be overtly political in their music, they should not discourage their fans from voting. I wonder if Spector’s music is going to become more political. Fred agrees it hasn’t been so far (“perhaps that’s the indulgence”) but it hasn’t been a conscious decision.

He doesn’t feel a responsibility to write about anything other than what he feels like writing about, but politics has been increasingly playing on his mind. “I think that this generation musically needs to be more politicised and I think it should be a conversation that’s happening and I’ve only just realised in the last two years that that’s where the responsibility might be, just to keep the conversation going for young people and make people realise it’s relevant if they aren’t already aware of it.”

So much of Spector’s music so far seems to have involved reliving their youth and a romanticisation of the past. Macpherson admits he does feel time slipping away from him, but reasons that as soon as you write about something it’s in the past and that music itself adds an instant melodrama. He mentions older lyricists like Nick Cave and Tom Waits and his hopes still to be making music in his 60s when it will make more sense and not just be about, ‘Oh, I went to this party, I met this girl’.

Talking to Macpherson, I’m excited about Spector’s new album. But perhaps I’m even more interested to see what they do further down the line. Macpherson’s great self-awareness and reflection is charming. As he puts it, “There’s more to write about, I’m just only starting to experience it”.

Plush faces racism allegations

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On Friday of 6th week, black student Khomosto Moshikaro was refused service at The Plush Lounge by the bar staff. Moshikaro claimed that the denial of service was racially motivated.

Kameel Premhid, Moshikaro’s friend who was with him on the night in question, recounted the events in an affidavit he sent to the nightclub, complaining about his friend’s treatment by bar staff, stating, “I attempted to buy drinks for my friend Khomotso Moshikaro and myself. Upon receiving my drinks order, [the staff member serving me] proceeded to inform me that I was able to order drinks [for myself] but no longer able to order drinks for my friend. The justification offered by said staff member… was that my friend was ‘too drunk’ and did not need any more alcohol. After said bar staff member made such pronouncement as to the state of sobriety of my friend, she proceeded to serve me subsequent rounds of drinks with little or no regard to my state of being.

“At no [other] point was any concern raised directly and/ or indirectly about the state of sobriety of myself or my friend. In fact, no issue was made as to our continued presence at Plush other than when the bar was approached. In the absence of any concern being raised, I would like to know upon what basis – if any – any judgment was made with respect to the sobriety of my friend.”

The Plush Lounge issued a statement in response to the alleged racial discrimination, stating, “Plush Oxford is owned and operated by members of a minority community with an equally diverse workforce. Our aim is to provide a safe and inclusive environment regardless of sexual orientation, age, gender, race or colour of skin. The suggestion that institutional racism exists within our organisation is strongly denied and upsetting.

“As an experienced and responsible licensed retailer of alcohol, we take very seriously our obligations in respect of the sale of products to members of the public deemed to be intoxicated. The law places requirements on both the premises management and serving staff, both of which could face criminal proceedings for failing to observe the law. We will not comment on specific situations, but can confirm that a recent matter has been brought to our attention and we are now in dialogue with the individual concerned regarding this matter.”

Premhid responded, “How does Plush refute claims that its staff exercise, whether directly or indirectly, racially discriminatory policies against those discernibly identifiable as black given the unjustified discrepancy in treatment by its own bar staff of non-black and black patrons on two different occasions?

“Oxford is by and large a liberal, progressive, and tolerant place. We would be fooling ourselves to think, however, that all forms of prejudice have been eradicated, even in places we would otherwise be happy to consider to be safe.”

Marc Shi, an Oxford student, commented to Cherwell, “While I see that this is just an allegation, it unfortunately wouldn’t surprise me at all if this turned out to be true, and also wouldn’t surprise me if the club continues to deny that anything ‘racist’ was happening.

“I think living in a society in which racism and colonialism are entrenched in almost every system and social interaction means that along with coming out in obvious, violent ways, it also comes out in these subtle, easy-to-miss ways.”

Pembroke students slam LA Fitness advert’s "sexism"

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Pembroke students are complaining about the alleged sexism of an advert for gym chain LA Fitness located near the College.

A written complaint was submitted to LA Fitness by Pembroke JCR’s Gender Equality Rep Ronni Blackford on Monday, criticising the national advertising campaign which includes the slogan, “We guarantee to lose your baggage this summer”, believed by the students to be specifically targeted at women through the depiction of women’s swimwear.

LA Fitness Oxford is located directly behind Pembroke College, whose students are offered discounted membership. Controversy started when Pembroke fresher Imo Watson posted a photo of the poster on Facebook last Thursday captioned, “Because only women have baggage to lose apparently… #lafitness #lafuckoff”, receiving 80 likes.

Blackford told Cherwell, “I’m very disappointed by LA Fitness’ current advertising scheme. It is a blatant display of sexism, suggesting women use the gyms for the sole purpose of losing weight and completely ignoring the many other reasons for which many women go – from gaining and increasing fitness, to training for a new challenge, or simply using it as stress relief especially during a busy Oxford term.”

She added, “Perhaps the worst issue for me is that any part of anyone’s body might be deemed ‘baggage’ – self-love and self-care are so important in a society that pressures young people, especially young women, into hating their bodies, and this campaign actively subscribes to such an unkind and unhealthy culture.”

Blackford threatened to involve the Advertising Standards Agency in her complaint. Cherwell understands that a motion of condemnation will be submitted to the JCR on Sunday.

Rule 4.1 of the UK Code of Non-broadcast Advertising states, “Marketing communications must not contain anything that is likely to cause serious or widespread offence. Particular care must be taken to avoid causing offence on the grounds of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, disability or age.”

Watson said, “LA Fitness should know better – rather than shaming women into exercising by suggesting they have ‘baggage’, they ought to be encouraging confidence and self-appreciation. By focusing on what people can gain from exercise (strength, fitness, health etc) rather than on what they should be losing (‘baggage’), the gym would create a much healthier view towards body image, and a much more positive atmosphere compared to how it is currently.”

She added, “For the past year or so I’ve struggled with getting the right balance between exercising and over-exercising (at one point I went to the gym for 2.5 hours every day) and to have posters such as this outside the gym really does not help!”

LA Fitness is yet to respond to Blackford’s complaint and to Cherwell’s request for comment.

Profile: Alexandra Shulman

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Having studied Social Anthropology at university, Alexandra Shulman has long understood the importance of fashion in society. “It’s a way of saying what tribe you belong to. It’s a way of saying what message you want to give out at that particular point.” She pauses. “On the other hand, I do think that if you make a decision not to be interested in what you wear, that is a decision that you are making too.”

We both laugh. Not interested in fashion is exactly how Shulman appeared to some people when she was appointed Editor-in-Chief of British Vogue in 1992, and indeed to this day people still marvel over the fact that she doesn’t look like a Vogue editor. “It’s kind of hard to remember,” she says of that period, “because it was 23 years ago now.” And therein lies all the rebuttal one needs, she doesn’t look like a Vogue editor, she looks like the longest-standing British Vogue editor. She continues, “I didn’t come from a culture where anyone would think like that and so I had no idea that anyone would think like that.” She did expect, however, that they would think that she didn’t have much experience in fashion, which she says was “frankly nothing but the truth”.

“You wouldn’t believe how little I knew,” she says quite seriously. She may have understood the importance of fashion, but she didn’t understand fashion at all. “It does seem very odd now,” she continues, “a lot of people who go into fashion have very much decided to do so. I’m unusual in having come at it from another route.” Shulman’s particular route took her from her degree in Social Anthropology, via two jobs at her dream workplace of record labels, both of which she was fired from, only to come full circle to her parents’ career of journalism, writing for various magazines before she became editor of GQ and then Vogue.

This route may not have afforded her much experience in fashion, but next year she will have edited Vogue for twice as many years as she did everything else before. She is now not only very much interested in fashion, but she wants to encourage other women to be so too. She wants them not to be afraid of appearing “in a fashion construct”. It has become something of a “hobbyhorse” of hers, so much so that when I bring it up she nods, “Yes, I was just talking about this over supper,” as she launches into the issue again quite happily for my sake. “In America, you will have a politician and they will absolutely accept that they will get dressed up in a Donna Karen dress and be photographed for the cover of Vogue. Our female politicians find it really hard to get dressed in fashion and be photographed and be put in the magazine with fashion pictures. They are concerned that it trivialises them in some way. It’s so important to change that. We’re finding it is improving, but it is slow, there is no question about that.”

As the conversation turns to the fashion industry itself, it is clear that there too progress can be slow, especially when Shulman is one of the only voices consistently calling for change. We’re talking about what Shulman calls “extreme thinness”. In 2009, she wrote to a number of high profile designers asking them to make larger sample sizes to send to Vogue for shoots, as the ones they were supplying were increasingly “miniscule”. The letter provoked little reply- let alone change. “I can’t change it alone” she says with a sigh. “I think the fashion industry really lets itself down by not doing something about it. I think it’s unrealistic, I think it’s unhelpful, and I think it’s unattractive.”

Although she assures me that Vogue takes it really quite seriously, she reminds me that it isn’t only a fashion problem. “It’s in showbiz, films, television. I mean you look at women on television who aren’t models, they’re grown women and they’re tiny.”

Meanwhile, the fashion industry, and particularly fashion magazines, face other problems. If it’s the creative whims and fancies of designers she’s up against when it comes to size, its cold, hard economics she’s fighting when it comes to race. “If I put a smiley blonde girl on the cover of Vogue, she’ll sell more magazines than a dark haired model, let alone a black model.” Again, she insists change is happening, but she admits that it’s slow and due perhaps to the nature of the expanding Asian market with India and China (two places the industry is very excited about at the moment, along with Istanbul).

“We really are in the last stages of the American empire,” she says, “At the moment, China is following a western model. Real change is going to come when the Chinese start using Chinese models, Chinese designers, Chinese photographers, and then we’re going to start wanting Chinese fashion too.”

This eastern shift has been promised since the dawn of the digital age, which brings with it a looming threat to print media. What, I am by no means the first person to wonder, does this mean for British Vogue? “In the short term, or in fact in the medium term, I think that the print will really hold up,” Shulman assures me. “We are holding up really, really well.” By which she means there has been an increase in the magazine’s monthly circulation to 200,000 copies in the 20 years that Shulman has been overseeing it. However, as to the print magazine’s future in another 20 years she admits she simply doesn’t know.

What she does know and can tell me is that she has been looking at what Vogue is. “Vogue is an idea about something, an idea that is fashion, beauty and contemporary culture. We’ve been looking at what we can do with that thing that is Vogue apart from the magazine. There’s more and more of that, whether that’s Vogue videos, which we’ve just started filming, whether that’s e-commerce, whether that’s my Vogue Festival, whether that’s an exhibition. There’s a lot going on, but without the magazine, without that print magazine being really solid and being admired it won’t all really work.”

As Editor-in-Chief, Shulman oversees all of “that”. “When I came to Vogue editing the actual magazine was about 80 per cent of my job,” she tells me, “I should think now it’s about 35 per cent of it. It’s really changed.”

I wonder how Shulman, who describes herself as a journalist, has managed not only to cope with, but make a huge success out of, this exponential change and for so many years. Even if some people still don’t think she looks like one, she surely has the unflinching nerves of a Vogue editor? Perhaps not, she’s more than comfortable to tell me about the anxiety she has suffered with on and off since she fell ill with glandular fever at university.

“It happened badly at certain points in my life. I’ve learnt quite a lot of coping mechanisms. I have learnt how to try to switch it off when I see it happening, breathing techniques, I’ve got tranquilizers. But I think it’s very difficult when you’re at university at that age and more and more I see anxiety as being a big issue for people, far more than it was when I was at university.” The other big issue she sees in her young, mostly female, employees at Vogue, is the tension between family and work. It’s one that she faced herself, as a single mother of one. Of course she wishes that she had been able to spend more time with her son Sam, but in the same way she wishes “a whole load of things”, like, she says that she was a good gardener. “It was never going to happen because I was the breadwinner and I was a single mother for a lot of it. But I think we were lucky in lots of ways. I had enough money to have nice nannies I liked having around. I saw a lot of Sam – I only have one child so when I wasn’t working I was with him and so I spent more time one on one with him than probably many people who have a family of three who aren’t working full time.

“I think women have to realise women can’t have it all, because nobody can have it all. It’s nothing to do with women, it’s just unrealistic to think you can have it all. I think that a lot of the pressure that lots of people put on themselves is thinking that you can have it all: you can have a great career, you can have kids, you can look wonderful, you can be thin, you can have wonderful friends, you can have a beautiful home, but you can’t, nobody, nobody can do that.” Note, not even Vogue editors. She continues, “You have to decide what the most important things to you are and I think they change.”

After nearly 25 years signing off on Vogue, I wonder whether her most important things have changed and what that means for her and Vogue. After all, she has already told me that on the day we spoke she has just received the hard copy of her second novel. “I don’t know. I never saw myself doing this and I don’t really know what I’ll do next. I just think it will probably be something different and I’m sure it will be interesting. I feel very excited about the idea of doing something else without having any desire actually to do it.”

Whatever it is, it doesn’t sound like it will be what a Vogue editor should do next. We may be making light of the perceived Vogue ditor persona, but I point out that you cannot deny that personalities matter now in Vogue.

What was once a magazine that wrote about the industry, has now become such an institution within the industry itself, and so have the journalists that create it, whether they like it or not.

Shulman agrees, “There is no question that in a relatively short amount of time, I would say the last five years or so, the personalities involved in the industry and the magazine have become more objects of interest than they were and I mean in some ways it’s flattering, in some ways it’s interesting, and we are kind of creatives so that’s good, but on the other hand I don’t think one’s job is to be an actor or a model, it has to be a by-product of what you do.”

I suppose this is the sort of by-product she wants fashion to become for other women, who whether they are told they look like it or not, are at the top of their game. 

The injustice of this country’s deportation policy

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This week, the UK government ignored calls from students, MPs and campaigners and deported a student to what will probably be his death. Majid Ali was studying at City of Glasgow College when he was called into a Home Office meeting on Friday. He was then detained, and held at Dungavel Immigration Removal Centre over the weekend. On Tuesday, he was flown out of Heathrow at midnight, on a chartered flight to Pakistan.

Ali had appealed for asylum in the UK, after his brother was ‘disappeared’ by the Pakistani intelligence services in 2010. Last month, his family home was raided and his uncle and cousin were both shot and killed. All three, like Ali, are members of Baloch nationalist groups seeking political independence from Pakistan.

Despite a motion in Parliament signed by almost 60 MPs, and thousands of letters sent to the Home Office, the immigration minister James Brokenshire and Home Secretary Theresa May decided to press ahead with the student’s deportation. Ali is now in Pakistan, unable to be contacted by friends in the UK, and certainly fearing that the government that has killed three members of his family will soon come for him.

No one I knew who was involved in the campaign to prevent Ali’s deportation had heard about Balochistan before this weekend, where nationalists have been fighting a guerrilla war against the Pakistani military. Human Rights Watch has reported widespread disappearances of suspected militants and activists by the military, intelligence agencies, and the paramilitary Frontier Corps. These ‘disappearances’ are where authorities take people into custody and often torture them, including beatings with sticks or leather belts, hanging detainees upside down, and depriving them of food and sleep. The ‘disappeared’ are never seen again, and there are hundreds of such cases, like that of Ali’s brother.

That the British government ignored Ali’s plea for asylum, and ignored the calls of parliamentarians, student unions and friends to ensure his safety is an absolute disgrace. His blood will be on the hands of those in positions of power, like May and Brokenshire, who once again upheld the inherent racism of our immigration system and denigrated human rights.

Under the Detained Fast Track System, many people who claim asylum are detained on arrival in the country and imprisoned in a place like Harmondsworth Immigration Removal Centre, which holds up to 3,000 people. Those deported are then taken to private airports late at night, bundled onto planes, never to see the UK again. Human rights groups and newspapers constantly report the abuses, indecency and injustice of this system.

One of the most depressing aspects of Ali’s story is that when he took his seat on that chartered flight, handcuffed, possibly subjected to violence, he was one asylum seeker among many, and the only one we knew about.

Why it’s nonsense to say that education should be free

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For some reason, almost every day I receive a Facebook invitation to a march somewhere in London to protest against austerity and to support free education. I must confess I’ve never been a huge believer in mass street demonstrations. I somehow feel politics should be done deliberately and rationally, not with balaclavas and smoke bombs. Ultimately, though, I don’t really care. I think it is a shame that police attention is diverted and public money unnecessarily spent, but if you want to spend your weekend holding a ‘F*ck the Tories’ banner somewhere in London, go on and have fun. What does interest me, however, is this whole narrative of ‘free’ education.

I don’t think the people who support the ‘Free Education’ movement actually believe education should be free. They probably (hopefully?) realise that building and maintaining lecture theatres costs money, that tutors must be paid and that books and test tubes don’t come for free. So I presume that what they mean is that our tertiary education shouldn’t be paid for by us, the students, but rather from general taxation, that is, from everyone’s taxes. That way, we get a free ride, and someone else ends up paying for our education.

I truly do wonder: what is fairer about a working bloke in the opposite corner of the country paying for my shiny Oxford degree? Or alternatively, what is fairer about borrowing more money, so that my grandchildren (if I were planning on having any) have to pay for it? Sure, having a good degree is by no means all about money, but to deny that studying PPE at Christ Church will probably help me earn some dollar later on would be silly. Does it not make sense I should contribute a little and pay for this comparative advantage myself?

It is also a popular narrative to say that higher tuition fees put a huge number of people off applying. It only takes one brief look at the publicly available data to realise this is simply not true. There was a very small drop in the number of applicants in 2012, but the number grew in 2013 and grew further still in 2014 – there were just under 600,000 applicants, compared to about 450,000 in 2007. What’s really interesting is that the number of applicants from the lowest income bands is growing the fastest. This is because universities can now offer more scholarships and grants to those applicants.

Look at what’s happening in Scotland. Scottish students are being squeezed out by huge numbers of EU applicants who – unlike the English – also get ‘free’ education. Thus, rather than levying fees and directing bursaries and scholarships to able kids from deprived backgrounds, the progressive Nationalists double down in a middle-class giveaway.

Unlike in the USA, the generous public loans in this country mean that no applicant who is smart enough will decline her university offer just because she doesn’t have enough cash. To campaign for ‘free’ education has become a totemic mantra, but frankly I just don’t buy it.

For the time being, I’m glad the government pays for my education, and when I start earning money, I’ll happily contribute my fair share for the enormous privilege of studying at a British university.