Men’s Premier League Football

Sure to be fiercely contested this season. Reigning champions Christ Church will again be challenged by a St Catz team who missed out on the title by a single point last year. College football giants Worcester must also be considered contenders for the title after they impressively won the first division last year to promote them back to where tradition dictates they belong.

First Division Men’s Rugby

An intriguing battle between teams with rich and successful pasts. Cuppers champions Univ will be confident that they can displace perennial favourites Keble, who dominated last years’ league, from the top spot. Teddy Hall, most successful of all rugby playing colleges, can never be discounted as challengers – but it would be a shock if they managed to take the title this season.

Women’s Premier League Football

Womens’ football in increasingly competitive – last season, Wadham / Green Templeton took the title on goal difference from Mansfield. Both these sides will hope for a similar performance this year but must be wary of the threat posed by an impressive Somerville side. Somerville women won the second division last year at a canter and also took the cuppers title: it is difficult to see past them when predicting where the first division title will go this year.

It has been an impressive season for Oxford University’s Women’s Cricket Team with a series of victories in the warm up matches, including winning their group in the BUCS trophy and enjoying high profile games, such as hosting the MCC in the Parks.

Oxford entered this year’s Varsity match with increased optimism, following a talented intake of freshers to play alongside some OUWCC regulars. The Varsity campaign this season held much more hope than the previous year, with an impressive bowling attack looking dangerous. Held at Lord’s at the same time as the men’s game, the women’s fixture is enjoying increasing support each year, with the nursery ground providing a fantastic venue.

Winning the toss for the 50 over match, Oxford put Cambridge into bat first. Cambridge batted solidly against Oxford’s tight bowling attack throughout their innings, but lost wickets regularly, keeping Oxford in the game. Good middle order support was provided by Bellfield and Lavender, helping Cambridge to a total of 241, all out. Bex Hay and Pim Fitzpayne, both taking 2 wickets at crucial moments, led the Oxford bowling attack, with Captain Sophie le Marchand coordinating the field from behind the stumps.

With 241 as the target, Oxford set out after lunch, optimistically knowing that the total was achievable with a good batting performance throughout the order. Sophie le Marchand marshalled the innings from the top, making an impressive 79, the highest score in the match.
Unfortunately, wickets fell regularly and when Le Marchand was out at the fall of the 6th wicket, Cambridge celebrated knowing that victory was near. Oxford made a total of 133 all out, allowing Cambridge to retain the Varsity title.

Oxford’s own language also extends in to the world of its sport. With this in mind, your benevolent sports team here at Cherwell have decided to help you out with a handy glossary, but don’t blame us when your home friends balk at your stories of croquet cuppers or blades at Torpids.

Blue: The big daddy. Denotes both the first team of any Oxford sport, as well as the award given to any player who takes the field in Varsity matches in sports such as rugby union, football, cricket, hockey and rowing.

Blue tac: Not only a banned substance on college walls, Blue tac is also seen on a Wednesday night in Park End when certain Oxford females will try to bag themselves a Blue, identifying them by their club tie.

Bumps: With the River Isis being too narrow to fit several crews in a line, bumps racing is the principle form of racing at Oxford. Crews line up in divisions one behind the other and try to ‘bump’ the crew in front and start the next day ahead of them in the division. A crew that bumps on every day of the regatta wins blades, a crew that is bumped ever day ‘wins’ spoons.

Cuppers: Inter-College knock out competition. Typically university sportsmen are allowed to compete, making for higher standard matches, and a lot of splinters if you play in one of their positions.

Catching Crabs: When your blade (oar) gets stuck under your boat it is known as catching a crab. This doubles up as a hackneyed punch line of many a rowing joke.

Croquet: Croquet cuppers is supposedly the biggest croquet competition in the world, and is the focal point of what is a surprisingly entertaining summer sport. Find three friends, have a laugh, and then get knocked out by a team that takes it far too seriously.

Iffley: A cover-all term that describes everything at the university sports complex on Iffley road. Site of the running track, university sports pitches, swimming pool and gym.

Half Blue: Awarded to those who compete in Varsity matches in supposedly less prestigous sports. Athletics gets a half blue; so does dancing. Fair? You decide.

Summer VIIIs: Arguably the apogee of inter-collegiate sport, summer VIIIs is a bumps regatta that takes place in the 5th week of Trinity term. Whilst the rowing provides an exciting interlude, the main attraction is Saturday of Eights, where thousands of people flock to the Isis to frolic in the sun and drink Pimm’s.

Vinnie’s: a.k.a. Cassa de Lad, this boys’ only club is the haunt of Oxford’s top sportsmen. You have to be suggested and then approved to become a member, and are allowed no female company before 6 p.m. Perks include cheap food, cheap booze and so many lad points you may need a bigger van to carry them in.

Rugby

Having played rugby at school, it was natural for me to try out for the Merton-Mansfield team. We are currently in the fourth division out of five, so ‘try-out’ is an exaggeration. This is the great advantage of college sport: anyone can give it a go. Our best find has been a Canadian powerlifter (and ex grizzly-bear-wrestler) Jake, who had never played rugby before coming to Oxford as, but now has a habit of single-handedly destroying front rows.

In my second year, I was made captain and was forced to approach the games and training from a different perspective – with an eye to organisation and a very active nexus account. It was a rewarding experience, especially when a training move came off in a match.
The best thing about college rugby is that it has given me the chance to carry on playing where at other universities I wouldn’t be good enough. It perfectly bridges the gap between a friendly kick-about and constant training and protein shakes.

Best Bit: Playing a cuppers, plate or bowl final at the Blues Rugby Stadium in Iffley.

Worst Bit: A tackle from a Canadian Powerlifter…

Cherwell says: With competition for the Blues team making it almost impossible for the casual rugby player to be in with a sniff, college rugby provides a more than suitable alternative.

Rowing

Unless you’re a) American or b) masochistic, then rowing in the first two terms at Oxford might be something to avoid. Whilst it may be sold as the ‘quintessential Oxford experience’, the reality is a combination of blisters, drinking bans and ‘banter’ that’s as omnipresent as it is terrible. But everyone rows at Oxford, right? Yes, but timing is crucial: rowing in Trinity is an entirely different beast. Whilst those serious boaties step up their training for the pinnacle of their lycra-clad careers – Summer VIIIs – a new breed also emerges on to the Isis in Trinity term, typically in the afternoon, and only when it’s not raining: the beer boat.

Whilst over 50% of undergraduates row at some point in Oxford, the majority sensibly decide that the best format for this is in the sun, with a group of friends and where the choice of fancy dress for the race is far more important than the actual training. The reality is you will probably spend Saturday of Summer VIIIs pissed on a balcony but at least you’ll have had a good laugh.

Best Bit: Fancy dress and a large amount of Pimms.

Worst Bit: Possibility of undesirable encounter with lycra.

Cherwell says: Beer boats provide a leisurely introduction to rowing, with most of the gain and none of the pain. And you still get to say you rowed at Oxford.

Football

For many players the most rewarding aspect of college football is the self-delusion of accumulation of stash. The fact that you bought it yourself, for the kind of money you would never spend on actual clothes doesn’t spoil the excitement of looking like a pro at two o’clock every Wednesday afternoon in front of literally several people. After all, how will they know which name to chant unless it’s printed on your back? Proper footballers must sometimes privately acknowledge the joy of seeing in a their initialled kitbag the realisation of an adolescent dream. Apparently, during his playing days Mark Hughes’ passport photo was a Panini sticker of himself.

College football lets you meet your boyhood self at halfway. Happily, there is also an online outlet for this kind of make-believe as OUAFC.com records individual and team statistics and league tables. And sometimes, it actually seems as if somebody other than yourself might care how good you look and how many goals you score.

Best Bit: Official kit, complete with name and number printing. Every football fan’s dream.

Worst Bit: Getting knocked off top spot in the scorer’s table by some upstart hall worker from Christchurch who isn’t even a student.

Cherwell says: The complete footballing experience.

Cricket

In Trinity of first year a JCR email asked if anybody wanted to play in a ‘recreational’ match. I hadn’t picked up a cricket bat since Primary school, but I was assured that this more than qualified me. Our team of 8, including novices like myself alongside someone who had played for Warwickshire Under-15s found ourselves playing a Hertford XI one Friday afternoon. There was lots of ginger cake (not sure why, but thanks nonetheless, Hertford), lots of poor cricket mixed with friendly competition and lots of laughs. I can’t remember the result, to be honest I don’t much care to try; never has it been more true that it was not the winning, but the taking part, the trying something new, that counted.

Be it a new sport, or one you already enjoy, and whether you want to compete nationally, between colleges, or if you just want to go to the pub afterwards, I urge you to throw yourself into Oxford sporting life; you’ll make friends, have fun and maybe, just maybe, you’ll get some cake.

Best Bit: Social Cricket = sporting socials.

Worst Bit: Its’s hard to see any downside to free cake…

Cherwell says: Get involved. There is nothing better than a well earned pint
at the college bar after a ‘hard fought’ victory.

Cuppers Football

Cuppers is an intercollegiate knockout competition that runs throughout the first two terms and means that, unlike normal, all eleven players are obliged to turn up before the start of the match. There are Cuppers competitions in most sports played in Oxford, including croquet Cuppers, but football competition attracts the most participants and is keenly contested. The mens’ competition can be traced back to 1882 and, by the time of the final at Iffley Road sports ground, you can see why the competition is held in such high regard. The chance to experience a cheering crowd and hold a trophy aloft means that success in Cuppers is rightly considered the pinnacle of achievement in college football. Last season Lincoln won the mens’ title and Somerville the womens’ – both teams winning despite not playing in the highest league. The competition won’t be starting for another few weeks, but you can be sure that when it does there will be a flurry of extra training sessions (or the beginning of some training sessions), an insistence that people actually show up on time for games and a general sense of the importance of this tournament (until you get knocked out of course).

Varsity Rugby

Varsity rugby is the showpiece event of the rugby calender and a chance for the blues to earn their status as gods among men. It takes place at the beginning of the Christmas holidays and, despite a series of highly competitive games during the term, anyone with a vague grasp of what sport is all about in Oxford will tell you that Varsity is pretty much the only game that really matters. Anyone without such sporting knowledge will tell you that what’s really important about the varsity match is the opportunity it provides for a post-term, pre-Christmas catch up with friends and copious amounts of alcohol. The first varsity match betwen Oxford and Cambridge was played in 1872, and fans have been flocking to the pubs around the Twickenham ground ever since. Some even watch the match. Last year the dark blues were beaten 31-27 in a pulsating encounter, so some revenge will definitely be sought in this season’s event. The blues rugby season has already begun: the gruelling schedule and hours of work in the gym may seem unappealing at the moment, but if it leads to a Varsity victory at Twickenham – and the spoils of victory afterwards – then all will surely agree that it was well worth it.

Christchurch Regatta

Christchurch regatta has been cancelled twice in the last ten years as a result of appauling weather conditions. Dealing with high winds, driving rain and freezing temperatures will quickly dispel any idea that rowing is a glamourous sport: the Boat Race is hard work and high profile, but Christchurch regatta is just hard work. Fortunately, though, it’s also challenging, rewarding, addictive and even satisfying, and hundreds of freshers every year find out that it’s possible to make it to an early morning outing whilst still drunk and still fancy-dressed. Who cares if it’s dark and raining? Kukui’s dark and damp, too, so just close your eyes and imagine. There are mens’ and womens’ competitons and the standard is impressively varied, so you can indulge your sporting dreams even if you’ve never seen a boat before. And it’s not difficult to sign up: should thoughts of ‘perhaps’, ‘possibly’, ‘maybe one day’ trying rowing even cross your mind, you’ll find that an eager boatclub captain will materialise by your side, with a winning smile and a promise that donning lycra in the early morning really is what floats your boat. They’re like guardian angels, but more masochistic.